If Sam Allardyce’s appointment as England manager caused some consternation, from everyone from the fans in the stands to the suits in the boardroom, none could have predicted the ignominy of his departure just 67 days after landing his dream job.
The funk following newspaper revelations last month, in which Allardyce was caught unwittingly advising undercover reporters posing as businessmen asking how they could navigate around the illegal process of third-party ownership of players, still lingers around the corridors of Wembley.
It is hard to blame the English Football Association (FA) then for turning to someone who personifies all they wish to promote as head of the national team: a manager beyond reproach, someone who played at the highest level for both club and country and someone who is unlikely to cause them further embarrassment off the pitch.
More England
• Greg Lea: England v Malta preview – Gareth Southgate gets as good a chance as any for first impression
• Diego Forlan: Sam Allardyce, stings and the other side of the media equation
In Gareth Southgate, they have the antithesis of arrogant gun-slinger Allardyce – a safe pair of hands, someone who knows the inner workings of the FA and has been groomed in its coaching system off and on for five years, first as the head of elite development, from 2011 to 2012, and then from 2013 as manager of the Under 21 side.
His record with England’s young guns reads well: Played 34, won 27, drawn four, lost three with a 79.4 per cent win ratio. But the team’s performance at last year’s U21 European Championship saw them not even good enough to progress from the group stage.
While few expect Southgate’s appointment to last beyond its four-game caretaker remit the former Middlesbrough manager may well have designs on the job long term.
A few winnable 2018 World Cup qualifiers against Malta (on Saturday), Slovenia and Scotland, as well as a friendly against Spain before next summer are on the schedule.
Southgate, capped 57 times as a player, could get a jump on other potential candidates – Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger is linked with the job when his contract ends in 2017 – by winning all of them and leaving the powers that be in something of a quandary.
Do they move for Wenger now through fear of missing out? They could try but the Frenchman is renown for his loyalty to contracts. So any move would have to wait until after the end of the Premier League season. But therein lies another pitfall. What if Arsenal win the title and Wenger, buoyed by the idea of building another dynasty, elects to stay?
For many the ideal scenario is a combination of the both: Southgate enhances his credentials with a successful stint before handing the reins over to Wenger, working and learning under one of the most respected managers of the modern era as his assistant.
You know what they say, though. If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
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Winners
Ballon d’Or (Men’s)
Ousmane Dembélé (Paris Saint-Germain / France)
Ballon d’Or Féminin (Women’s)
Aitana Bonmatí (Barcelona / Spain)
Kopa Trophy (Best player under 21 – Men’s)
Lamine Yamal (Barcelona / Spain)
Best Young Women’s Player
Vicky López (Barcelona / Spain)
Yashin Trophy (Best Goalkeeper – Men’s)
Gianluigi Donnarumma (Paris Saint-Germain and Manchester City / Italy)
Best Women’s Goalkeeper
Hannah Hampton (England / Aston Villa and Chelsea)
Men’s Coach of the Year
Luis Enrique (Paris Saint-Germain)
Women’s Coach of the Year
Sarina Wiegman (England)
The specs
Engine: 2.3-litre, turbo four-cylinder
Transmission: 10-speed auto
Power: 300hp
Torque: 420Nm
Price: Dh189,900
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Killing of Qassem Suleimani
The specs: Rolls-Royce Cullinan
Price, base: Dh1 million (estimate)
Engine: 6.75-litre twin-turbo V12
Transmission: Eight-speed automatic
Power: 563hp @ 5,000rpm
Torque: 850Nm @ 1,600rpm
Fuel economy, combined: 15L / 100km
The specs
Engine: 2.0-litre 4-cyl turbo
Power: 247hp at 6,500rpm
Torque: 370Nm from 1,500-3,500rpm
Transmission: 10-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 7.8L/100km
Price: from Dh94,900
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THE BIO:
Favourite holiday destination: Thailand. I go every year and I’m obsessed with the fitness camps there.
Favourite book: Born to Run by Christopher McDougall. It’s an amazing story about barefoot running.
Favourite film: A League of their Own. I used to love watching it in my granny’s house when I was seven.
Personal motto: Believe it and you can achieve it.
Key facilities
- Olympic-size swimming pool with a split bulkhead for multi-use configurations, including water polo and 50m/25m training lanes
- Premier League-standard football pitch
- 400m Olympic running track
- NBA-spec basketball court with auditorium
- 600-seat auditorium
- Spaces for historical and cultural exploration
- An elevated football field that doubles as a helipad
- Specialist robotics and science laboratories
- AR and VR-enabled learning centres
- Disruption Lab and Research Centre for developing entrepreneurial skills
The biog
Hobby: "It is not really a hobby but I am very curious person. I love reading and spend hours on research."
Favourite author: Malcom Gladwell
Favourite travel destination: "Antigua in the Caribbean because I have emotional attachment to it. It is where I got married."
The Sand Castle
Director: Matty Brown
Stars: Nadine Labaki, Ziad Bakri, Zain Al Rafeea, Riman Al Rafeea
Rating: 2.5/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Our legal columnist
Name: Yousef Al Bahar
Advocate at Al Bahar & Associate Advocates and Legal Consultants, established in 1994
Education: Mr Al Bahar was born in 1979 and graduated in 2008 from the Judicial Institute. He took after his father, who was one of the first Emirati lawyers
Roll of honour
Who has won what so far in the West Asia Premiership season?
Western Clubs Champions League - Winners: Abu Dhabi Harlequins; Runners up: Bahrain
Dubai Rugby Sevens - Winners: Dubai Exiles; Runners up: Jebel Ali Dragons
West Asia Premiership - Winners: Jebel Ali Dragons; Runners up: Abu Dhabi Harlequins
UAE Premiership Cup - Winners: Abu Dhabi Harlequins; Runners up: Dubai Exiles
West Asia Cup - Winners: Bahrain; Runners up: Dubai Exiles
West Asia Trophy - Winners: Dubai Hurricanes; Runners up: DSC Eagles
Final West Asia Premiership standings - 1. Jebel Ali Dragons; 2. Abu Dhabi Harlequins; 3. Bahrain; 4. Dubai Exiles; 5. Dubai Hurricanes; 6. DSC Eagles; 7. Abu Dhabi Saracens
Fixture (UAE Premiership final) - Friday, April 13, Al Ain – Dubai Exiles v Abu Dhabi Harlequins
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What is graphene?
Graphene is extracted from graphite and is made up of pure carbon.
It is 200 times more resistant than steel and five times lighter than aluminum.
It conducts electricity better than any other material at room temperature.
It is thought that graphene could boost the useful life of batteries by 10 per cent.
Graphene can also detect cancer cells in the early stages of the disease.
The material was first discovered when Andre Geim and Konstantin Novoselov were 'playing' with graphite at the University of Manchester in 2004.