'What you need," the shopkeeper told me critically, scanning my souvenir boxes of Celtic design jewellery, "is a Scottish accent. You'd be much happier in life." I meekly told him I'd try my best to acquire one as soon as possible and he snorted, gazing comfortably down an ample belly. In Edinburgh for a holiday, I'm enjoying - and still getting used to - the friendliness, languid sense of humour and quirks of the people here up north in the land of tartan and the Loch Ness Monster.
In most parts of the world, people consider teenagers, perhaps justifiably, as best neither seen nor heard. The first thing I noticed in Edinburgh, as we took the lift up to the hotel room, was how locals actually want to talk to you, if only about what a rainy summer they're having.
Heading out, it's rather disconcerting to have famous names from history or English lessons jump out at you from plaques or monuments dotted over the city, trumpeting how they lived or died in a street nearby. There's a pub called Rabbie Burns, named after the poet Robert. You don't quite know what to feel when you stumble across the grave of John Napier, the inventor of logarithms, in a parish church. Probably bordering on a vindictive pleasure that the cause of misery for so many teenagers lies dead below your feet.
Rather more exciting were the little restaurants, such as The Elephant House, claiming that it was the birthplace of Harry Potter, JK Rowling having written parts of the series at its tables. For some camera-clutching tourists, this was all too overwhelming. Pointing and shrieking at the sign, they flooded in to absorb some of the aura of greatness presumably still lingering.
Galleries and museums can appear excruciatingly boring, but we teenagers can quite appreciate blood, gore and guts that lurk within. It's fascinating what some of those marauding clans of yesteryear did to each other - creating a guillotine with the delicate title of "the maiden", for example. The Surgeons' Hall Museum revealed the legend of a couple of blokes called Burke and Hare, who took a liking to the practice of murdering people. Considerately, they even had the courtesy to devise a way that left the bodies undamaged. This was so they could sell the cadavers to medical professors who'd use them in dissections and learn all about saving patients. That's the sort of thing they should teach us in school.
I haven't summoned up the courage to try any haggis just yet, although I have enjoyed the lilting music of bagpipes from the plethora of kilted buskers on every street. The trip's almost over, and I know I'll feel a wee bit miserable as we leave these bonnie, bonnie banks, with the moon comin' out in the gloamin' and everything else that's wonderful about the place.
If you go
Where to stay: Courtyard by Marriott Titusville Kennedy Space Centre has unparalleled views of the Indian River. Alligators can be spotted from hotel room balconies, as can several rocket launch sites. The hotel also boasts cool space-themed decor.
When to go: Florida is best experienced during the winter months, from November to May, before the humidity kicks in.
How to get there: Emirates currently flies from Dubai to Orlando five times a week.
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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COMPANY PROFILE
Founders: Alhaan Ahmed, Alyina Ahmed and Maximo Tettamanzi
Total funding: Self funded
Heather, the Totality
Matthew Weiner,
Canongate
The Sand Castle
Director: Matty Brown
Stars: Nadine Labaki, Ziad Bakri, Zain Al Rafeea, Riman Al Rafeea
Rating: 2.5/5
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Dubai Bling season three
Cast: Loujain Adada, Zeina Khoury, Farhana Bodi, Ebraheem Al Samadi, Mona Kattan, and couples Safa & Fahad Siddiqui and DJ Bliss & Danya Mohammed
Rating: 1/5
Jigra
Starring: Alia Bhatt, Vedang Raina, Manoj Pahwa, Harsh Singh
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
match info
Athletic Bilbao 1 (Muniain 37')
Atletico Madrid 1 (Costa 39')
Man of the match Iker Muniain (Athletic Bilbao)
Emergency
Director: Kangana Ranaut
Stars: Kangana Ranaut, Anupam Kher, Shreyas Talpade, Milind Soman, Mahima Chaudhry
Rating: 2/5
Biography
Favourite Meal: Chicken Caesar salad
Hobbies: Travelling, going to the gym
Inspiration: Father, who was a captain in the UAE army
Favourite read: Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki and Sharon Lechter
Favourite film: The Founder, about the establishment of McDonald's
57%20Seconds
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Manikarnika: The Queen of Jhansi
Director: Kangana Ranaut, Krish Jagarlamudi
Producer: Zee Studios, Kamal Jain
Cast: Kangana Ranaut, Ankita Lokhande, Danny Denzongpa, Atul Kulkarni
Rating: 2.5/5
German intelligence warnings
- 2002: "Hezbollah supporters feared becoming a target of security services because of the effects of [9/11] ... discussions on Hezbollah policy moved from mosques into smaller circles in private homes." Supporters in Germany: 800
- 2013: "Financial and logistical support from Germany for Hezbollah in Lebanon supports the armed struggle against Israel ... Hezbollah supporters in Germany hold back from actions that would gain publicity." Supporters in Germany: 950
- 2023: "It must be reckoned with that Hezbollah will continue to plan terrorist actions outside the Middle East against Israel or Israeli interests." Supporters in Germany: 1,250
Source: Federal Office for the Protection of the Constitution
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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The specs
Engine: 3.0-litre six-cylinder turbo
Power: 398hp from 5,250rpm
Torque: 580Nm at 1,900-4,800rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed auto
Fuel economy, combined: 6.5L/100km
On sale: December
Price: From Dh330,000 (estimate)
How to protect yourself when air quality drops
Install an air filter in your home.
Close your windows and turn on the AC.
Shower or bath after being outside.
Wear a face mask.
Stay indoors when conditions are particularly poor.
If driving, turn your engine off when stationary.
KILLING OF QASSEM SULEIMANI
The Greatest Royal Rumble card as it stands
50-man Royal Rumble - names entered so far include Braun Strowman, Daniel Bryan, Kurt Angle, Big Show, Kane, Chris Jericho, The New Day and Elias
Universal Championship Brock Lesnar (champion) v Roman Reigns in a steel cage match
WWE World Heavyweight Championship AJ Styles (champion) v Shinsuke Nakamura
Intercontinental Championship Seth Rollins (champion) v The Miz v Finn Balor v Samoa Joe
United States Championship Jeff Hardy (champion) v Jinder Mahal
SmackDown Tag Team Championship The Bludgeon Brothers (champions) v The Usos
Raw Tag Team Championship (currently vacant) Cesaro and Sheamus v Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt
Casket match The Undertaker v Chris Jericho
Singles match John Cena v Triple H
Cruiserweight Championship Cedric Alexander v tba