My corporate employers are very much into charity stunts to help market the company. As a result, I have done the ALS ice bucket challenge as part of a group and a number of other charity events such as three-legged races, fancy dress days and team sports events. Now I am being asked to take part in a wet sponge challenge as part of a charity fun day. This will involve my colleagues throwing wet sponges at me for 15 minutes, while my head and hands are locked in stocks. As a senior-level manager, I find this slightly inappropriate so how can I wriggle out of it without looking like a party pooper. ND, Dubai
For me there are two things to consider here. The first is whether you should try to wriggle free, and the second is, if you decide to do so, how you achieve that ambition without being revealed as a party pooper.
Let’s deal with the matter of principle first. Should you do it? Not too many of us like to have our sense of personal dignity undermined – but funnily enough it can be very valuable to show a more human face to colleagues and employees.
This particular stunt is risk-free, presumably for a good cause, unlikely to be too uncomfortable or demanding, and even reasonably brief in duration.
I am tempted to say get over yourself and get on with it. You won’t come to harm, and you may well positively affect attitudes towards you.
If you do avoid this challenge and the vast bulk of your colleagues participate, those who avoid will be noticed and noted by the employees, with potentially far worse consequences than a dampening experience and a brief challenge to your personal dignity.
These charity stunts are certainly becoming more popular. Some of them can be quite fun to do, even giving us a chance to experience something which normally we wouldn’t encounter.
But others are silly, inconsequential and – even if briefly – uncomfortable. But don’t underestimate the effect on the organisation’s sense of comradeship.
In today’s busy world, we get very few opportunities to interact with colleagues and employees on a purely social basis.
Don’t underestimate how valuable these occasions can be.
A brief conversation, an exchange of pleasantries, a chance to ask after someone’s family – all these can be valuable bricks in the wall of an inclusive organisational culture.
Conversely, if senior level managers are absent from such occasions, all you do is create a bigger gap between executives and other staff – a gap you may come to regret helping to create when you find yourself really needing a rapport with the rest of the organisation.
So my first top tip is this: steel yourself, get on with it and try to wring some enjoyment from those damp sponges. If, despite all this, you decide you want to wriggle free, then you need a plan. Do you want to be absent entirely, or merely avoid the loss of dignity associated with being pelted by wet sponges?
Maybe there is a Master of Ceremonies role you could create or obtain? Or you could offer your services as referee, the maintainer of fair play. That allows you to be involved, but not committed. Which in turn reminds me of the man who, over lunch, was asked to explain the difference between involvement and commitment. He stared at his plate of sliced turkey and scrambled eggs and then said to his questioner “Look at my breakfast and think of how it got here. In creating this breakfast, the chicken which provided the eggs was involved … but the turkey who provided the meat was committed.”
If you choose to wriggle free, you can elect to be principled and explain your reservations to your boss, asking to be excused this stunt as you fear it will undermine your authority.
The risk, of course, is that your boss judges you and finds you lacking. Or you might find a compelling business-based reason to be elsewhere – a client meeting, a new business opportunity, a customer who needs to be pacified.
Doctor’s prescription
Try to make your reason for pulling out real – you don’t want to be caught in a deceit. Or, finally, you can fall strategically ill on the day before the event. Something contagious, perhaps, which makes it inappropriate for you to attend lest you infect others.
Roger Delves is the director of the Ashridge Executive Masters in Management and an adjunct professor at the Hult International Business School. He is the co-author of the book The Top 50 Management Dilemmas: Fast Solutions to Everyday Challenges. Email him at business@thenational.ae for advice on any work issues
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