• An Afghan boy in Kabul holds a red rose as he looks for money before Valentine's Day. AP
    An Afghan boy in Kabul holds a red rose as he looks for money before Valentine's Day. AP
  • An Afghan boy sells Valentine's Day balloons on a street in Kabul. AP
    An Afghan boy sells Valentine's Day balloons on a street in Kabul. AP
  • A man in Kabul buys heart-shaped balloons from a street vendor before Valentine's Day. AP
    A man in Kabul buys heart-shaped balloons from a street vendor before Valentine's Day. AP
  • An Afghan street vendor waits for customers before Valentine's Day in Kabul. AP
    An Afghan street vendor waits for customers before Valentine's Day in Kabul. AP
  • An Afghan street vendor waits for customers before Valentine's Day in Kabul. AP
    An Afghan street vendor waits for customers before Valentine's Day in Kabul. AP
  • People in Kabul celebrate Valentine's Day in 2019. Reuters
    People in Kabul celebrate Valentine's Day in 2019. Reuters
  • Valentine's Day in Afghanistan. AP
    Valentine's Day in Afghanistan. AP
  • A woman holds a bouquet of roses as she leaves a flower shop in Kabul last year. AP
    A woman holds a bouquet of roses as she leaves a flower shop in Kabul last year. AP

Separated on Valentine's Day: the Afghan lovers with only bittersweet memories


  • English
  • Arabic

Since the first time they met in 2017 in India, Afghan couple Sara Rahimi, 26, and Mohammad Haroon Rahimi, 27, were inseparable.

“We dated for a few years, and after returning to Afghanistan, we got engaged about a year ago. Initially, my family resisted because he is from a different tribe, but after meeting him and his family, we were able to convince them,” Ms Rahimi said.

Both of their first names have been changed but the couple are identified as Mr and Ms Rahimi, which is the name they had planned to engrave on their door after their wedding that they had planned for September last year.

As a young couple in a conservative society, they pushed cultural boundaries.

“Compared to India where we had a lot of freedom, dating in Kabul was a struggle,” Mr Rahimi said.

“The first thing we did was save money between us and purchased a car so we could travel together. We would drive around Kabul, go to cafes and restaurants. You name a restaurant in Kabul, and we have been there,” he said, smiling as he recalled the fond memories

But as fate would have it, the Taliban seized Kabul just weeks before their wedding.

As a development professional working with a USAID project on empowering women, Ms Rahimi’s life came under extreme threat from extremists.

“I come from a very conservative province and my family faced a lot of threats and opposition when I started work,” she says, referring to her struggle during the 20 years after the US-led invasion and subsequent Taliban insurgency.

“But because my family continued to support me I was able to continue my work,” she said, adding that now with the Taliban in power, threats against her were more real than before.

“They see me as an American puppet, and used to call us infidels.”

Afghan women defy the Taliban - in pictures

  • Zakia, an economics student who had to abandon her studies when the Taliban took control of Afghanistan in August, at her home in the capital Kabul, where women are coming together to stand against the hardline regime. All photos: AFP
    Zakia, an economics student who had to abandon her studies when the Taliban took control of Afghanistan in August, at her home in the capital Kabul, where women are coming together to stand against the hardline regime. All photos: AFP
  • She is part of a growing group that started with 15 activists, mostly women in their 20s who already knew each other. Now a network of dozens of women work in secret to organise protests.
    She is part of a growing group that started with 15 activists, mostly women in their 20s who already knew each other. Now a network of dozens of women work in secret to organise protests.
  • Hoda Khamosh, a published poet and former NGO worker who organised workshops to help empower women, vets newcomers to the group to ensure they can be trusted.
    Hoda Khamosh, a published poet and former NGO worker who organised workshops to help empower women, vets newcomers to the group to ensure they can be trusted.
  • One test she sets is to ask them to prepare banners or slogans at short notice - she can sense passion for the cause from women who deliver quickly.
    One test she sets is to ask them to prepare banners or slogans at short notice - she can sense passion for the cause from women who deliver quickly.
  • Other tests yield even clearer results. Hoda says one potential recruit was given a fake date and time for a demonstration. The Taliban turned up ahead of the supposed protest, and all contact was cut with the woman suspected of tipping off officials.
    Other tests yield even clearer results. Hoda says one potential recruit was given a fake date and time for a demonstration. The Taliban turned up ahead of the supposed protest, and all contact was cut with the woman suspected of tipping off officials.
  • A core group of the activists use a dedicated phone number to co-ordinate on the day of a protest. That number is later disconnected to ensure it is not being tracked.
    A core group of the activists use a dedicated phone number to co-ordinate on the day of a protest. That number is later disconnected to ensure it is not being tracked.
  • "We usually carry an extra scarf or an extra dress. When the demonstration is over, we change our clothes so we cannot be recognised," says Hoda.
    "We usually carry an extra scarf or an extra dress. When the demonstration is over, we change our clothes so we cannot be recognised," says Hoda.
  • She has changed her phone number several times and her husband has received threats. "We could still be harmed, it's exhausting. But all we can do is persevere," she says.
    She has changed her phone number several times and her husband has received threats. "We could still be harmed, it's exhausting. But all we can do is persevere," she says.

After nine days under the Taliban regime, with Ms Rahimi staying in hiding, she received a call from her American employers advising her to get to the airport for evacuation.

However, as a single unmarried woman, she could not take Mr Rahimi with her since he was not her legal partner. Compounding the problem, as an NGO worker he was not directly employed by the US and was therefore not eligible to be flown out, despite the threats to his life.

“But he insisted that I leave and he will try to come after me. But it has been over five months and so far we’ve had no luck on getting him here,” she said, breaking down in tears.

“I miss my city. I miss its dusty roads. I miss the food. But most of all, I miss him so much. We have never been separated this long.”

Kabul was our city of love but without her this city is meaningless. I am miserable
Mohammad Haroon Rahimi

In Kabul, Mr Rahimi finds himself connected with her in love and grief. “We loved the life we were building here. Kabul was our city of love but without her this city is meaningless. I am miserable, I lost everything overnight,” he said.

The Rahimis are not alone in their loss; in the chaos of the evacuations that followed the fall of Kabul, many Afghan families, particularly young couples, found themselves torn apart and strewn across the world.

The separation is now taking an emotional toll, Afghan mental health professionals say. “Long distance relationships are hard as it is, but mixed in with the trauma of dealing with the loss of their country, identity and loved ones, it’s bound to take a toll on relationships and individual mental health,” Dr Hadi Rasooli, an Afghan mental health expert, told The National.

Dr Rasooli has many years of experience in counselling vulnerable individuals to cope with trauma endured during conflict in Afghanistan. He stressed the long-term emotional damage separations could cause to a person already undergoing trauma.

“Particularly in the case of Afghans who are culturally conditioned to find comfort in large families, separation from someone they love can cause dissociation, where they struggle to fill the vacuum created by the sudden and unplanned loss,” he explained, adding that he was witnessing similar mental health issues arise among the recent groups of Afghans who were forced to flee.

Separation has been hard on the Rahimis.

Sometimes he cries over the phone and it breaks my heart. I don’t know when we will be reunited
Sara Rahimi

“It is challenging; we cannot always talk because of the time difference. He is emotionally exhausted. He lost his job when the NGO he worked at shut down. Sometimes he cries over the phone and it breaks my heart,” Ms Rahimi said.

She is constantly worried the Taliban might hurt him for his work with foreigners. “I don’t know when we will be reunited. Sometimes I think I made a mistake by leaving him behind,” she said.

However, Mr Rahimi insists they made the right decision. “I am so happy she is out of this country. It is the worst place for a woman to be. It is not easy to live a life like this under the Taliban. But I am happy that at least she is out,” he said.

Dr Rasooli said that in recent years, younger Afghans such as the Rahimis had increasingly been exercising their own agency in choosing their partners, a previously rare practice.

“This was particularly empowering for women who felt they had a say in their lives and built stronger, healthier relationships,” he said.

The Taliban take over of Afghanistan - in pictures

  • A Taliban fighter prays next to a demonstration organised by the Afghan Society of Muslim Youth, demanding the release of frozen international money in Kabul, Afghanistan. AP Photo
    A Taliban fighter prays next to a demonstration organised by the Afghan Society of Muslim Youth, demanding the release of frozen international money in Kabul, Afghanistan. AP Photo
  • A Taliban fighter and a group of Afghan men attend Friday prayers in Kabul. AP Photo
    A Taliban fighter and a group of Afghan men attend Friday prayers in Kabul. AP Photo
  • Taliban soldiers in Bagram Air Base in Parwan. Reuters
    Taliban soldiers in Bagram Air Base in Parwan. Reuters
  • Taliban soldiers Seifatollah and Vasighollah stand in a prison in Bagram Air Base. Reuters
    Taliban soldiers Seifatollah and Vasighollah stand in a prison in Bagram Air Base. Reuters
  • Taliban patrol Kabul. EPA
    Taliban patrol Kabul. EPA
  • Vahdat, a Taliban soldier and former prisoner, stands next to exercise equipment in Bagram Air Base. Reuters
    Vahdat, a Taliban soldier and former prisoner, stands next to exercise equipment in Bagram Air Base. Reuters
  • A Taliban fighter stands guard near Zanbaq Square in Kabul. AFP
    A Taliban fighter stands guard near Zanbaq Square in Kabul. AFP
  • Taliban fighters police a road in Herat. AFP
    Taliban fighters police a road in Herat. AFP

Over the years, since the fall of the Taliban, the culture around dating in Afghanistan evolved, albeit at a very slow pace and largely restricted to the urban centres. It was not uncommon to find Valentine’s Day paraphernalia around the markets and restaurants in Kabul in the days preceding February 14.

The historical Koch-e-Gul-Faroushi (Flower Street) in the heart of Kabul would light up with decorations and thousands of innovative flower arrangements luring the young crowds, to celebrate the western-inspired day of love.

“During Valentine’s Day, we would both take days off and go out for a fancy lunch. And then we would go shopping, and I would shower her with gifts and she would do the same,” Mr Rahimi said.

However, the Taliban, known for their fundamentalist interpretation of Islam, are unlikely to allow an environment that fosters such companionship.

“It takes away the power from the youth, and women and I speculate that we will see many emotional divorces, if not actual divorces in the coming years,” Dr Rasooli said, explaining that emotional divorces are state of mental resignation from the relationship when a person feels hopelessness and lack of control over their lives.

The Rahimis are determined not to let that happen to them.

Ms Rahimi said that she was working to get her partner into the US. However, immigration bureaucracy and strict rules for Afghans had made it extremely difficult for the couple to reunite.

“It might take years before she receives her documents that will allow her to sponsor me, and even then she might not be able to seek a family reunification since legally we do not belong to each other. But emotionally, we are one soul,” Mr Rahimi said.

The biog

Marital status: Separated with two young daughters

Education: Master's degree from American Univeristy of Cairo

Favourite book: That Is How They Defeat Despair by Salwa Aladian

Favourite Motto: Their happiness is your happiness

Goal: For Nefsy to become his legacy long after he is gon

Fixtures

50-over match

UAE v Lancashire, starts at 10am

Champion County match

MCC v Surrey, four-day match, starting on Sunday, March 24, play starts at 10am

Both matches are at ICC Academy, Dubai Sports City. Admission is free.

Company%20profile
%3Cp%3EName%3A%20Tabby%3Cbr%3EFounded%3A%20August%202019%3B%20platform%20went%20live%20in%20February%202020%3Cbr%3EFounder%2FCEO%3A%20Hosam%20Arab%2C%20co-founder%3A%20Daniil%20Barkalov%3Cbr%3EBased%3A%20Dubai%2C%20UAE%3Cbr%3ESector%3A%20Payments%3Cbr%3ESize%3A%2040-50%20employees%3Cbr%3EStage%3A%20Series%20A%3Cbr%3EInvestors%3A%20Arbor%20Ventures%2C%20Mubadala%20Capital%2C%20Wamda%20Capital%2C%20STV%2C%20Raed%20Ventures%2C%20Global%20Founders%20Capital%2C%20JIMCO%2C%20Global%20Ventures%2C%20Venture%20Souq%2C%20Outliers%20VC%2C%20MSA%20Capital%2C%20HOF%20and%20AB%20Accelerator.%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Tearful appearance

Chancellor Rachel Reeves set markets on edge as she appeared visibly distraught in parliament on Wednesday. 

Legislative setbacks for the government have blown a new hole in the budgetary calculations at a time when the deficit is stubbornly large and the economy is struggling to grow. 

She appeared with Keir Starmer on Thursday and the pair embraced, but he had failed to give her his backing as she cried a day earlier.

A spokesman said her upset demeanour was due to a personal matter.

Mercer, the investment consulting arm of US services company Marsh & McLennan, expects its wealth division to at least double its assets under management (AUM) in the Middle East as wealth in the region continues to grow despite economic headwinds, a company official said.

Mercer Wealth, which globally has $160 billion in AUM, plans to boost its AUM in the region to $2-$3bn in the next 2-3 years from the present $1bn, said Yasir AbuShaban, a Dubai-based principal with Mercer Wealth.

Within the next two to three years, we are looking at reaching $2 to $3 billion as a conservative estimate and we do see an opportunity to do so,” said Mr AbuShaban.

Mercer does not directly make investments, but allocates clients’ money they have discretion to, to professional asset managers. They also provide advice to clients.

“We have buying power. We can negotiate on their (client’s) behalf with asset managers to provide them lower fees than they otherwise would have to get on their own,” he added.

Mercer Wealth’s clients include sovereign wealth funds, family offices, and insurance companies among others.

From its office in Dubai, Mercer also looks after Africa, India and Turkey, where they also see opportunity for growth.

Wealth creation in Middle East and Africa (MEA) grew 8.5 per cent to $8.1 trillion last year from $7.5tn in 2015, higher than last year’s global average of 6 per cent and the second-highest growth in a region after Asia-Pacific which grew 9.9 per cent, according to consultancy Boston Consulting Group (BCG). In the region, where wealth grew just 1.9 per cent in 2015 compared with 2014, a pickup in oil prices has helped in wealth generation.

BCG is forecasting MEA wealth will rise to $12tn by 2021, growing at an annual average of 8 per cent.

Drivers of wealth generation in the region will be split evenly between new wealth creation and growth of performance of existing assets, according to BCG.

Another general trend in the region is clients’ looking for a comprehensive approach to investing, according to Mr AbuShaban.

“Institutional investors or some of the families are seeing a slowdown in the available capital they have to invest and in that sense they are looking at optimizing the way they manage their portfolios and making sure they are not investing haphazardly and different parts of their investment are working together,” said Mr AbuShaban.

Some clients also have a higher appetite for risk, given the low interest-rate environment that does not provide enough yield for some institutional investors. These clients are keen to invest in illiquid assets, such as private equity and infrastructure.

“What we have seen is a desire for higher returns in what has been a low-return environment specifically in various fixed income or bonds,” he said.

“In this environment, we have seen a de facto increase in the risk that clients are taking in things like illiquid investments, private equity investments, infrastructure and private debt, those kind of investments were higher illiquidity results in incrementally higher returns.”

The Abu Dhabi Investment Authority, one of the largest sovereign wealth funds, said in its 2016 report that has gradually increased its exposure in direct private equity and private credit transactions, mainly in Asian markets and especially in China and India. The authority’s private equity department focused on structured equities owing to “their defensive characteristics.”

Playing records of the top 10 in 2017

How many games the top 10 have undertaken in the 2017 ATP season

1. Rafael Nadal 58 (49-9)

2. Andy Murray 35 (25-10)

3. Roger Federer 38 (35-3)

4. Stan Wawrinka 37 (26-11)

5. Novak Djokovic 40 (32-8)

6. Alexander Zverev 60 (46-14)

7. Marin Cilic 43 (29-14)

8. Dominic Thiem 60 (41-19)

9. Grigor Dimitrov 48 (34-14)

10. Kei Nishikori 43 (30-13)

Liverpool 4-1 Shrewsbury

Liverpool
Gordon (34'), Fabinho (44' pen, 90' 3), Firmino (78')

Shrewsbury
Udoh (27'minutes)

Man of the Match: Kaide Gordon (Liverpool)

Avatar: Fire and Ash

Director: James Cameron

Starring: Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver, Zoe Saldana

Rating: 4.5/5

THE LIGHT

Director: Tom Tykwer

Starring: Tala Al Deen, Nicolette Krebitz, Lars Eidinger

Rating: 3/5

The Voice of Hind Rajab

Starring: Saja Kilani, Clara Khoury, Motaz Malhees

Director: Kaouther Ben Hania

Rating: 4/5

The biog

Favourite books: 'Ruth Bader Ginsburg: A Life' by Jane D. Mathews and ‘The Moment of Lift’ by Melinda Gates

Favourite travel destination: Greece, a blend of ancient history and captivating nature. It always has given me a sense of joy, endless possibilities, positive energy and wonderful people that make you feel at home.

Favourite pastime: travelling and experiencing different cultures across the globe.

Favourite quote: “In the future, there will be no female leaders. There will just be leaders” - Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook.

Favourite Movie: Mona Lisa Smile 

Favourite Author: Kahlil Gibran

Favourite Artist: Meryl Streep

Baby Driver

Director: Edgar Wright

Starring: Ansel Elgort, Kevin Spacey, Jamie Foxx, Lily James

Three and a half stars

Jetour T1 specs

Engine: 2-litre turbocharged

Power: 254hp

Torque: 390Nm

Price: From Dh126,000

Available: Now

The five pillars of Islam
25%20Days%20to%20Aden
%3Cp%3EAuthor%3A%20Michael%20Knights%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPages%3A%20256%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EAvailable%3A%20January%2026%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Who was Alfred Nobel?

The Nobel Prize was created by wealthy Swedish chemist and entrepreneur Alfred Nobel.

  • In his will he dictated that the bulk of his estate should be used to fund "prizes to those who, during the preceding year, have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind".
  • Nobel is best known as the inventor of dynamite, but also wrote poetry and drama and could speak Russian, French, English and German by the age of 17. The five original prize categories reflect the interests closest to his heart.
  • Nobel died in 1896 but it took until 1901, following a legal battle over his will, before the first prizes were awarded.

Who is Ramon Tribulietx?

Born in Spain, Tribulietx took sole charge of Auckland in 2010 and has gone on to lead the club to 14 trophies, including seven successive Oceania Champions League crowns. Has been tipped for the vacant New Zealand national team job following Anthony Hudson's resignation last month. Had previously been considered for the role. 

How to increase your savings
  • Have a plan for your savings.
  • Decide on your emergency fund target and once that's achieved, assign your savings to another financial goal such as saving for a house or investing for retirement.
  • Decide on a financial goal that is important to you and put your savings to work for you.
  • It's important to have a purpose for your savings as it helps to keep you motivated to continue while also reducing the temptation to spend your savings. 

- Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching

 

 

SPEC%20SHEET%3A%20SAMSUNG%20GALAXY%20S24%20ULTRA
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Diriyah%20project%20at%20a%20glance
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In-demand jobs and monthly salaries
  • Technology expert in robotics and automation: Dh20,000 to Dh40,000 
  • Energy engineer: Dh25,000 to Dh30,000 
  • Production engineer: Dh30,000 to Dh40,000 
  • Data-driven supply chain management professional: Dh30,000 to Dh50,000 
  • HR leader: Dh40,000 to Dh60,000 
  • Engineering leader: Dh30,000 to Dh55,000 
  • Project manager: Dh55,000 to Dh65,000 
  • Senior reservoir engineer: Dh40,000 to Dh55,000 
  • Senior drilling engineer: Dh38,000 to Dh46,000 
  • Senior process engineer: Dh28,000 to Dh38,000 
  • Senior maintenance engineer: Dh22,000 to Dh34,000 
  • Field engineer: Dh6,500 to Dh7,500
  • Field supervisor: Dh9,000 to Dh12,000
  • Field operator: Dh5,000 to Dh7,000

The Vines - In Miracle Land
Two stars

The Bio

Hometown: Bogota, Colombia
Favourite place to relax in UAE: the desert around Al Mleiha in Sharjah or the eastern mangroves in Abu Dhabi
The one book everyone should read: 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It will make your mind fly
Favourite documentary: Chasing Coral by Jeff Orlowski. It's a good reality check about one of the most valued ecosystems for humanity

Disability on screen

Empire — neuromuscular disease myasthenia gravis; bipolar disorder; post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

Rosewood and Transparent — heart issues

24: Legacy — PTSD;

Superstore and NCIS: New Orleans — wheelchair-bound

Taken and This Is Us — cancer

Trial & Error — cognitive disorder prosopagnosia (facial blindness and dyslexia)

Grey’s Anatomy — prosthetic leg

Scorpion — obsessive compulsive disorder and anxiety

Switched at Birth — deafness

One Mississippi, Wentworth and Transparent — double mastectomy

Dragons — double amputee

MO
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LA LIGA FIXTURES

Thursday (All UAE kick-off times)

Sevilla v Real Betis (midnight)

Friday

Granada v Real Betis (9.30pm)

Valencia v Levante (midnight)

Saturday

Espanyol v Alaves (4pm)

Celta Vigo v Villarreal (7pm)

Leganes v Real Valladolid (9.30pm)

Mallorca v Barcelona (midnight)

Sunday

Atletic Bilbao v Atletico Madrid (4pm)

Real Madrid v Eibar (9.30pm)

Real Sociedad v Osasuna (midnight)

GIANT REVIEW

Starring: Amir El-Masry, Pierce Brosnan

Director: Athale

Rating: 4/5

The five pillars of Islam

1. Fasting 

2. Prayer 

3. Hajj 

4. Shahada 

5. Zakat 

GOLF’S RAHMBO

- 5 wins in 22 months as pro
- Three wins in past 10 starts
- 45 pro starts worldwide: 5 wins, 17 top 5s
- Ranked 551th in world on debut, now No 4 (was No 2 earlier this year)
- 5th player in last 30 years to win 3 European Tour and 2 PGA Tour titles before age 24 (Woods, Garcia, McIlroy, Spieth)

The specs

Engine: 4.0-litre V8 twin-turbocharged and three electric motors

Power: Combined output 920hp

Torque: 730Nm at 4,000-7,000rpm

Transmission: 8-speed dual-clutch automatic

Fuel consumption: 11.2L/100km

On sale: Now, deliveries expected later in 2025

Price: expected to start at Dh1,432,000

The biog

Age: 19 

Profession: medical student at UAE university 

Favourite book: The Ocean at The End of The Lane by Neil Gaiman

Role model: Parents, followed by Fazza (Shiekh Hamdan bin Mohammed)

Favourite poet: Edger Allen Poe 

'Worse than a prison sentence'

Marie Byrne, a counsellor who volunteers at the UAE government's mental health crisis helpline, said the ordeal the crew had been through would take time to overcome.

“It was worse than a prison sentence, where at least someone can deal with a set amount of time incarcerated," she said.

“They were living in perpetual mystery as to how their futures would pan out, and what that would be.

“Because of coronavirus, the world is very different now to the one they left, that will also have an impact.

“It will not fully register until they are on dry land. Some have not seen their young children grow up while others will have to rebuild relationships.

“It will be a challenge mentally, and to find other work to support their families as they have been out of circulation for so long. Hopefully they will get the care they need when they get home.”

Updated: February 14, 2022, 7:44 AM