The strong word is that Ralph Hassenhuttl’s number is almost up at Southampton. Safe to say the Austrian, the fourth longest-serving manager in the Premier League, would prefer a different fixture to act as the make-or-break game to decide his future than Saturday’s trip to Manchester City.
At City, Erling Haaland’s numbers are certainly up. And up. And up. After the Norwegian scored his 18th and 19th City goals against FC Copenhagen on Wednesday, it became clear that perhaps this only way to prevent Haaland on current form from scoring a hat-trick in every outing at the Etihad is to restrict him to only 45 minutes of action – or to let the defenders marking him lose their bearings so badly they start doing his scoring for him.
Poor David Khocholava has his name next to City’s third in the 5-0 win over the Danish side, because a loose ball, heading towards a lurking Haaland, ricocheted off Copenhagen’s Denis Vavro before then deflecting off Khocholava for an own goal.
At that point, Kamil Grabara, the luckless visiting goalkeeper, could no longer disguise his exasperation. He made a remark to Haaland’s City colleague, Jack Grealish, that caused Grealish to smile. “I think it was after the third goal, their keeper said to me: ‘This guy’s not human'," revealed Grealish.
The superhuman was taken off at half-time, his goal ratio since he joined City from Borussia Dortmund in the summer by then trimmed to one every 50 minutes of action. Take away his blank competitive debut in the Community Shield at the beginning of August, and he’s averaging a goal per every half-match he has played in the competitions that City value highest: the Champions League and the Premier League.
Man City 5 Copenhagen 0: player ratings
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MANCHESTER CITY PLAYER RATIINGS: Ederson 7 – The Brazilian had nothing to do, facing no shots on target in the 90 minutes played. AFP -
Sergio Gomez 8 – The fullback looked bright going forward, and he saw his shot diverted into the back of the net from a double deflection just before half-time. EPA -
Aymeric Laporte 7 – A solid performance on his return to the side. EPA -
Ruben Dias 8 – Assured in the heart of defence on his 100th appearance for City. The centre-back mopped up any attempted attacks from the Danish opposition. PA -
Joao Cancelo 7 – Put in a disciplined performance and produced the assist for Haaland’s opening goal after just seven minutes. EPA -
Ilkay Gundogan 8 – Outstanding with and without the ball. The midfielder put in a strong display in the absence of Kevin de Bruyne. AFP -
Bernardo Silva 6 – Struck the post after 12 minutes and arguably should have done better from five yards out, as the Portuguese international fired over the bar. Replaced after 66 minutes. EPA -
Riyad Mahrez 6 – Looked confident on the left-hand side, and the Algerian made it four in the 54th minute with a goal from the penalty spot. AFP -
Jack Grealish 7 – A positive performance, but the Englishman was frustrated not to get on the scoresheet, as a heroic performance from Grabara between the sticks denied him a goal. EPA -
Julian Alvarez 7 – A quieter night for the Argentine, but he got his first goal in the Champions League after 76 minutes, converting Mahrez’s cross from a yard out. EPA -
Erling Haaland 9 – Scored after just seven minutes with his first touch of the game, and added a second just after the half-hour mark, nudging home Grabara’s parry from a Gomez shot. The brilliant Norwegian had to settle for a brace after being replaced by Palmer at the break. Reuters -
SUBS: Cole Palmer (Haaland 46’) 8 – The 20-year-old midfielder impressed after coming on at half-time. The midfielder was straight into the action and forced a save from Grabara after just 49 minutes. PA -
Rico Lewis (Cancelo 57’) 6 – The 17-year-old came on just before the hour mark and did not put a foot wrong in his Champions League debut. PA -
Joshua Wilson-Esbrand (Silva 66’) 7 – A comfortable cameo as the 19-year-old was the second teenager to make his Champions League debut off the bench after replacing Silva on 66 minutes. EPA -
FC COPENHAGEN PLAYER RATINGS: Kamil Grabara 8 – A superb performance despite conceding five goals. The Polish keeper made a number of outstanding stops and can only be faulted for the second goal after parrying Gomez’s shot into the feet of an awaiting Haaland. AFP -
Kevin Diks 4 – Deflected Gomez’s shot onto a helpless Khocholava to help City to a third goal before the break. AFP -
Denis Vavro 5 – Struggled with the pace and movement of the City attackers. PA -
Davit Khocholava 4 – Unfortunate to turn Gomez’s cross into his own net, likely denying Haaland another first-half hattrick. PA -
Victor Kristiansen 7 – The fullback worked hard for his side. Had a chance just after the break, but Cancelo just about put him off. EPA -
Marko Stamenic 5 – Gave away a penalty and received a yellow card after dragging down Laporte at the back post in the second half. AFP -
Lukas Lerager 6 – Got back well after 65 minutes to deny Silva a tap-in on the back post. AFP -
Viktor Claesson 5 – Given the run around by a dominant Gundogan in the midfield. EPA -
Isak Bergmann Johannesson 8 – The 19-year-old could have had a chance, but he did not gamble on the far post after Gomez chose to leave Daramy’s cross. PA -
Mohamed Daramy 6 – Looked the greatest attacking threat for his side, but the forward was replaced after 55 minutes. Reuters -
Mamoudou Karamoko 4 – The striker had little impact before being forced off at half-time. Reuters -
SUBS: Valdemar Lund (Karamoko 46’) 4 – Anonymous after his introduction. EPA -
Hakon Arnar Haraldsson (Daramy 56') 4 – The teenager had a tough ask after being thrown on up front with his side 4-0 down. PA -
Peter Ankersen (Diks 66’) 4 – The defender came on with the game out of reach. AFP -
Paul Mukairu (Claesson, 66) 4 – No contribution of note. / Christian Sorensen (Lerager, 79) – N/A. AFP
Imagine for a moment that Haaland finishes the club season with no grave injuries and ends up playing as much as, say Joao Cancelo did in 2021-22, when the Portuguese was seldom rested by City, being so valuable for his versatility and his consistency. He made 51 starts across competitions, and, very rarely taken off, he played 4,622 minutes all told.
Were Haaland to match that level of activity and maintain his astonishing goalscoring form so far, he’d hit more than 90 goals this season.
Far-fetched? It is, but there are special circumstances around this particular campaign that suggest Haaland may be spared some of the wear-and-tear injuries or general fatigue that strikers with his explosive qualities expect at some point each season.
Haaland will not be going to the World Cup in November, because Norway have not qualified, which means he can spend a month focused on physical conditioning, while many of the defenders who will have to face him, from late December, in club football recover from a sapping international tournament in Qatar.
Haaland, it bears reminding, is still only 22, and his record with injury is encouraging. He has a big frame to carry and the bursts of acceleration that are such a crucial part of his game put strain on muscle fibres.
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Phil Foden, right, and Erling Haaland both scored hat-tricks in Manchester City's 6-3 Premier League win over Manchester United at the Etihad Stadium on Sunday, October 2, 2022. Reuters -
Manchester City's Erling Haaland scores their fifth goal and completes his hat-trick. Reuters -
Erling Haaland celebrates scoring City's second goal. Getty -
Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola. EPA -
Erling Haaland celebrates scoring Manchester City's third goal - and his second. PA -
Erling Haaland scores City's third goal. Getty -
City's Erling Haaland celebrates after completing his hat-trick. AP -
Erling Haaland heads home City's second goal. Getty -
Phil Foden celebrates after giving Manchester City an early lead. Getty -
Phil Foden scores City's sixth goal and completes his hat-trick. Reuters -
Manchester United manager Erik ten Hag. Getty -
Manchester City's Kevin De Bruyne sees an early chance saved by David de Gea. PA -
Anthony Martial heads home Manchester United's second goal. Getty -
City's Erling Haaland after a missed chance. Reuters -
Phil Foden puts City 1-0 up. PA -
Antony after pulling one back for Manchester United. Getty -
Phil Foden scores City's fourth goal. PA -
Manchester City manager Pep Guardiola. Reuters -
Phil Foden celebrates scoring his second and City's fourth. Getty -
Anthony Martial scores United's third goal from the penalty spot. Reuters.
But his longest periods of recuperation at Dortmund were never longer than the seven-game stretch he was absent with a hip problem last autumn. He missed 16 games, spread across three injury lay-offs, for Dortmund last season and he still scored 29 times in all competitions, in his 30 appearances.
The City he has joined are more creative, better set up for a long run in the Champions League than Dortmund were, and Haaland has taken into his adventure in Manchester the confidence to aim at some of the more surreal goalscoring targets of the 21st century.
There’s the Lionel Messi landmark of 11 seasons ago. Pep Guardiola, the manager who withdrew Haaland at half-time against Copenhagen – preserving his freshness for Hassenhuttl’s Southampton and cutting short his attempt at a fourth home hat-trick for City – was witness and facilitator of Messi’s historic goal-spree of 2011-2012.
As Guardiola, then the Barcelona manager, steered Messi into a more central position in an outstanding Barca team, the Argentinian, then 24, responded with 73 goals in all competitions. That’s one for every 72 minutes he was on the pitch. Messi may need Haaland to ease off if his historic, epic season is to remain the ultimate modern touchstone for world-class goalscoring.
