Dear Ali: I used to think that Arab or Muslim men don't have enough respect for women, which I admit is a common stereotype in my country. However, after reading a couple of your previous articles, I noticed how often you mentioned the value of women and the respect that should be shown to them. So I want to ask, what is understood as respect towards women in your culture? DA, Canada
Dear DA: Thank you for asking this question. Honouring women is a very important subject in our culture, not only among Arabs, but also the Muslim world in general.
We’re commanded to respect our mothers more than anyone else. This how we’re brought up. This respect is understood as we shouldn’t say a word against our mother, or even a sigh of tiredness if she asks us to do something. This also goes for our sisters, daughters, wives and so on. It’s really important to make her needs a priority and to comfort her. We have a very powerful saying that the way to paradise lies at the feet of our mother. It teaches us how to honour a mother.
Another understanding of respect towards women in Islam and Arabic culture is protection – to protect her from any possibility of harassment, danger or mistreatment. It’s not only a family duty; every man in our country is responsible for women’s safety, whatever relationship they share. They could be anyone – relatives or strangers, it doesn’t matter.
We always try to remove any burden of difficulty from women’s shoulders, because we pay attention to their comfort, too. It means that she will always have some privileges: when she drives, at work, shopping or just walking in the street. Men will give way to her and try to assist as a priority. When visiting most organisations, she often won’t need to wait in a queue with men, because there will be a separate dedicated area for women. If there’s no such area, then women will probably be allowed to pass forward without the need to wait in turn. So it’s about offering comfort to her in all fields.
As you see, there’s a whole system for that, but what’s really interesting is how in countries such as the UAE it’s a woman’s right to have equal treatment to men. This is the real interpretation of how Islam has taught its followers to show respect to women and give them the value they deserve. This is why today in my beloved country, we tend to witness great achievements, from women being top students and graduating to pursuing their higher-education degrees, to Air Force pilots or in the Army, or engineers in various fields, not to mention excelling in communications, public relations, media, tourism and politics – we have several female ambassadors of the UAE in Europe and other regions.
But most importantly, we truly believe that women aren’t half of the society but all of it, because without our mothers, we wouldn’t exist, so they should always be treated as queens.
Ali Al Saloom is a cultural adviser and public speaker from the UAE. Follow @AskAli on Twitter, and visit www.ask-ali.com to ask him a question.
