Beware a striker scorned. Kenny Miller, somewhat unsurprisingly given the melodramatic nature of these games, scored twice on his return to Celtic Park
today - 12 months after being sold to Derby County amid a crop of accusations of being forced out and sold down the river by the club.
It was a bedraggled Celtic who were left treading water in the season's first meeting of the Glasgow sides.
They wound up losing a man, four goals and some of their stock of personal homepride. More infirm than Old Firm.
There are lots of routes to a 4-2 scoreline, but Rangers finished this match as far ahead of Celtic as Glasgow's Sauchiehall Street is long.
The home team managed to self combust in the second half. Their fans will want to forget these 90 minutes. As far as bad days at the office go, this was horrific. Rangers came, observed and dismantled their city rivals. It is almost 15 years since they last found four goals at Celtic Park.
Rangers had goalscorer Cousin sent off for persistent fouling before Celtic's Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink departed seconds later for a late lunge on Kirk Broadfoot.
They shipped a preventable fourth when the goalkeeper Artur Boruc inexplicably spilled the ball for Miller to tap home.
Miller netted against Rangers at home two seasons ago, but here he was positively raving among a sweltering visiting support. Celtic were marginally better in a cautious opening half but Cousin, a man who seems made for the exacting nature of such matches, bundled his way into the box to give them the lead on 42 minutes, slipping the ball inside Boruc's near post.
Boruc and the left-back Mark Wilson suffered nightmarish afternoons, but Boruc made a fine stop in the closing moments to prevent Miller recording a hat-trick. Rangers celebrated like there was no tomorrow as the troublesome Cousin, and a posse of the visiting players embarked upon the Rangers' assistant manager Ally McCoist after their first of the day.
Georgios Samaras restored parity a minute before half-time, the Greek striker prodding into the net before Celtic went out like a light in the second period.
Miller found the second with a thumping volley, ten minutes later the excellent Pedro Mendes clattered a shot into the corner of the home net with some velocity. Shunsuke Nakamura hit a late consolation with a free-kick, but Celtic were already frowning.
dkane@thenational.ae
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Director: Sriram Raghavan
Producer: Matchbox Pictures, Viacom18
Cast: Ayushmann Khurrana, Tabu, Radhika Apte, Anil Dhawan
Rating: 3.5/5
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RESULTS
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Winner: AF Yatroq, Brett Doyle, Ernst Oertel
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Winner: Nawwaf KB, Patrick Cosgrave, Helal Al Alawi
7.30pm: Handicap (TB) | Dh100,000 | 1,600m
Winner: Treasured Times, Bernardo Pinheiro, Rashed Bouresly
NO OTHER LAND
Director: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham, Rachel Szor, Hamdan Ballal
Stars: Basel Adra, Yuval Abraham
Rating: 3.5/5
David Haye record
Total fights: 32
Wins: 28
Wins by KO: 26
Losses: 4
A MINECRAFT MOVIE
Director: Jared Hess
Starring: Jack Black, Jennifer Coolidge, Jason Momoa
Rating: 3/5
Squid Game season two
Director: Hwang Dong-hyuk
Stars: Lee Jung-jae, Wi Ha-joon and Lee Byung-hun
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The White Lotus: Season three
Creator: Mike White
Starring: Walton Goggins, Jason Isaacs, Natasha Rothwell
Rating: 4.5/5
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Test
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Cast: Nayanthara, Siddharth, Meera Jasmine, R Madhavan
Star rating: 2/5