Emirati life coach and author Hala Kazim is clearly happy and content as she discusses her new Arabic self-help book, Hala and Life. "I'm over the moon," she says.
But the 53-year-old entrepreneur – who created Journey Through Change, a support programme to empower women through hiking and workshops in 2010 – was not always in such a good place.
About 20 years ago, she was struggling to cope with a socially crippling combination of depression and dyslexia, which affected the way people treated her.
She says it was only when she accepted it was up to her to change her situation that her life turned around. Now Kazim, who published her first book, Hala and Change, in 2015, wants to share her experiences to encourage other people to look inside themselves for the solutions to life's challenges.
“I want to help people change if they are willing to change,” says Kazim, who studied counselling and coaching at City University of London. She is also a certified Neuro-Linguistic Programming coach and practitioner with the American Board of NLP in the United Kingdom.
“There was something that my son told me that pushed me to write the book,” she says. “He told me that I am not only made for them, my children, but that I am made for the world. He asked me to pass on my knowledge to the world.”
Hala and Life, published by Lebanon-based Arab Scientific Publishers, is a guide to identifying limiting thoughts and addressing and eliminating stress factors. It is divided into two sections that focus on reflection and interaction with society.
Conversational in nature, the first section deals with striving for contentment.
“I start with awareness and self-consciousness, understanding being alone and lonely, but also embracing that sadness on our journey to loving oneself,” says Kazim.
In the chapters on community interaction, she discusses a range of topics, from coping with people with double standards to understanding men.
“There are suggestions, like laughing out loud is the best medicine, how to deal with people who give off negative vibes and not being taken for granted,” she says.
There is even a chapter on the joy of revenge – albeit of a benign kind. “It means the best revenge is to live the best you can,” she says. “My revenge is not about getting back at the person who hurt me, but the response would be to live a good life. That’s the best way to say that you have moved on.”
Kazim uses an example from her own life to demonstrate the importance of perseverance.
“No one comes with a booklet that tells you how to lead a happy life,” says Kazim. “I used to be so naive, until life slapped me left and right and I had to learn the hard way. My depression is always something that I talk about. But it was also what triggered me to aim for a better life. Also the challenges of being different, with dyslexia, have definitely helped strengthen my character.”
She got through her low point with the help of a therapist and by embarking on solo nature trips abroad.
“There are several studies that prove that walking in nature is the best counselling session one can have,” she says. “Your blood circulation improves, there is a release of Serotonin, and the fresh air allows you to think straight and positively.”
When Kazim was seeking support, depression and mental-health issues were more of a taboo in Arab society. There is less stigma now, she says, with Arabs generally more open to counselling.
“We have come a long way in talking about our mental-health issues,” says Kazim.
“Social media has changed the whole landscape and the Arab world is very open now. People understand that it is not a big deal to go to a coach or a psychologist if they are struggling with something.”
Kazim says an English translation of her book is in the works.
“I want people to take as much as they can from my experiences and turn any restrictions they feel into opportunities to grow and succeed,” she says.
• Hala and Life is available in bookstores, including Borders, Kinokuniya and Virgin Megastore. For more information about the author, visit www.halakazim.com
aahmed@thenational.ae
