After more than two years of trouble-, dent- and scratch-free service, my trusty Volkswagen Scirocco has finally had its first bash. I knew that this would happen eventually; it's a foregone conclusion that the insanity of the UAE's roads will affect you sooner or later. But twice in 24 hours?
The first incident involved driving past a taxi as the rear passenger opened his door to get out. Directly onto a road of fast-flowing traffic. Result? A deep gouge in the 'Rocco's front wing. As I stopped to inspect, assuming that he'd simply clobbered the door mirror, the taxi simply took off without stopping. And no, I didn't have the chance to make a note of the number plate - in fact, I can't even recall the colour of the taxi's roof.
What to do? Call the police, wait around for ages and miss my wife's appointment at the physiotherapist, resulting in her continued agony? Or simply deal with it once we got home? I chose the latter, but first called my insurance company to make doubly sure what they needed me to do. Seemed simple enough - just get a report number from the police so that they can start processing the claim.
It was when I called the police that things started to get a bit complicated, mainly because of the fact that, by the time I picked up the phone, the car had been involved in another scrape. I did what I've come so close to doing so many times, and took a ridiculously tight corner in our underground car park just a bit too tightly. Result? A deep dent, scraped paint and a gouged alloy wheel on the same side as the taxi wound. Simple enough, I reasoned, to explain what happened and get the magic report. What followed, however, was an exercise in madness.
As requested, I drove the car to Jebel Ali police station so it could be inspected. I was then told that the report for the taxi damage would take three days, to give whoever the driver was a chance to come forward and explain what happened. Fair enough. But then I was told to go home and call the police, so that they could visit me and the car at the location of the second incident. Having tried, and failed, to argue that it was better for the police to simply inspect it there and then, I went home to make the call.
When the officers turned up, they initially refused to visit the car park, saying that I had to bring the car to them. Funny, I thought I'd done that when I went to the station. But seeing how busy it was outside, I managed to convince them we'd all be better off going to the car.
As I explained to the officers what had happened, one of them started completing a form (entirely in Arabic except for the words "Traffic violation"), so I asked what it was for. "Accident," came the stern reply. But I had only damaged my own car, on private property, without harming anyone or anything else. How could I possibly be fined for that? So I asked how much it would be, seeing as there was no English wording on the form except, of course, instructions on how to pay. "Four hundred," he shrugged with a smile.
Staggered that I would be kicked while I was already down, I went and reported back to my wife. "They have to pay for the police somehow," she shrugged, and I suppose she's right. But if everyone involved in even the most minor scrapes, never mind serious accidents, in Dubai is fined that much, it's obvious that huge amounts of money are changing hands before cars even get a sniff of a repair shop.
It's luck, not judgement, that has prevented any previous scrapes, so no doubt I'll have to go through this debacle again sometime. But the confusion about what you're supposed to do, who you need to speak to, what you're meant to say and how much you'll end up having to pay in instances such as this is maddening. Surely there has to be a better way, for all our sakes.
khackett@thenational.ae
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What you as a drone operator need to know
A permit and licence is required to fly a drone legally in Dubai.
Sanad Academy is the United Arab Emirate’s first RPA (Remotely Piloted Aircraft) training and certification specialists endorsed by the Dubai Civil Aviation authority.
It is responsible to train, test and certify drone operators and drones in UAE with DCAA Endorsement.
“We are teaching people how to fly in accordance with the laws of the UAE,” said Ahmad Al Hamadi, a trainer at Sanad.
“We can show how the aircraft work and how they are operated. They are relatively easy to use, but they need responsible pilots.
“Pilots have to be mature. They are given a map of where they can and can’t fly in the UAE and we make these points clear in the lectures we give.
“You cannot fly a drone without registration under any circumstances.”
Larger drones are harder to fly, and have a different response to location control. There are no brakes in the air, so the larger drones have more power.
The Sanad Academy has a designated area to fly off the Al Ain Road near Skydive Dubai to show pilots how to fly responsibly.
“As UAS technology becomes mainstream, it is important to build wider awareness on how to integrate it into commerce and our personal lives,” said Major General Abdulla Khalifa Al Marri, Commander-in-Chief, Dubai Police.
“Operators must undergo proper training and certification to ensure safety and compliance.
“Dubai’s airspace will undoubtedly experience increased traffic as UAS innovations become commonplace, the Forum allows commercial users to learn of best practice applications to implement UAS safely and legally, while benefitting a whole range of industries.”
French business
France has organised a delegation of leading businesses to travel to Syria. The group was led by French shipping giant CMA CGM, which struck a 30-year contract in May with the Syrian government to develop and run Latakia port. Also present were water and waste management company Suez, defence multinational Thales, and Ellipse Group, which is currently looking into rehabilitating Syrian hospitals.
Tributes from the UAE's personal finance community
• Sebastien Aguilar, who heads SimplyFI.org, a non-profit community where people learn to invest Bogleheads’ style
“It is thanks to Jack Bogle’s work that this community exists and thanks to his work that many investors now get the full benefits of long term, buy and hold stock market investing.
Compared to the industry, investing using the common sense approach of a Boglehead saves a lot in costs and guarantees higher returns than the average actively managed fund over the long term.
From a personal perspective, learning how to invest using Bogle’s approach was a turning point in my life. I quickly realised there was no point chasing returns and paying expensive advisers or platforms. Once money is taken care off, you can work on what truly matters, such as family, relationships or other projects. I owe Jack Bogle for that.”
• Sam Instone, director of financial advisory firm AES International
"Thought to have saved investors over a trillion dollars, Jack Bogle’s ideas truly changed the way the world invests. Shaped by his own personal experiences, his philosophy and basic rules for investors challenged the status quo of a self-interested global industry and eventually prevailed. Loathed by many big companies and commission-driven salespeople, he has transformed the way well-informed investors and professional advisers make decisions."
• Demos Kyprianou, a board member of SimplyFI.org
"Jack Bogle for me was a rebel, a revolutionary who changed the industry and gave the little guy like me, a chance. He was also a mentor who inspired me to take the leap and take control of my own finances."
• Steve Cronin, founder of DeadSimpleSaving.com
"Obsessed with reducing fees, Jack Bogle structured Vanguard to be owned by its clients – that way the priority would be fee minimisation for clients rather than profit maximisation for the company.
His real gift to us has been the ability to invest in the stock market (buy and hold for the long term) rather than be forced to speculate (try to make profits in the shorter term) or even worse have others speculate on our behalf.
Bogle has given countless investors the ability to get on with their life while growing their wealth in the background as fast as possible. The Financial Independence movement would barely exist without this."
• Zach Holz, who blogs about financial independence at The Happiest Teacher
"Jack Bogle was one of the greatest forces for wealth democratisation the world has ever seen. He allowed people a way to be free from the parasitical "financial advisers" whose only real concern are the fat fees they get from selling you over-complicated "products" that have caused millions of people all around the world real harm.”
• Tuan Phan, a board member of SimplyFI.org
"In an industry that’s synonymous with greed, Jack Bogle was a lone wolf, swimming against the tide. When others were incentivised to enrich themselves, he stood by the ‘fiduciary’ standard – something that is badly needed in the financial industry of the UAE."
Normcore explained
Something of a fashion anomaly, normcore is essentially a celebration of the unremarkable. The term was first popularised by an article in New York magazine in 2014 and has been dubbed “ugly”, “bland’ and "anti-style" by fashion writers. It’s hallmarks are comfort, a lack of pretentiousness and neutrality – it is a trend for those who would rather not stand out from the crowd. For the most part, the style is unisex, favouring loose silhouettes, thrift-shop threads, baseball caps and boyish trainers. It is important to note that normcore is not synonymous with cheapness or low quality; there are high-fashion brands, including Parisian label Vetements, that specialise in this style. Embraced by fashion-forward street-style stars around the globe, it’s uptake in the UAE has been relatively slow.
Gifts exchanged
- King Charles - replica of President Eisenhower Sword
- Queen Camilla - Tiffany & Co vintage 18-carat gold, diamond and ruby flower brooch
- Donald Trump - hand-bound leather book with Declaration of Independence
- Melania Trump - personalised Anya Hindmarch handbag
Dolittle
Director: Stephen Gaghan
Stars: Robert Downey Jr, Michael Sheen
One-and-a-half out of five stars
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
FIXTURES
Saturday, November 3
Japan v New Zealand
Wales v Scotland
England v South Africa
Ireland v Italy
Saturday, November 10
Italy v Georgia
Scotland v Fiji
England v New Zealand
Wales v Australia
Ireland v Argentina
France v South Africa
Saturday, November 17
Italy v Australia
Wales v Tonga
England v Japan
Scotland v South Africa
Ireland v New Zealand
Saturday, November 24
|Italy v New Zealand
Scotland v Argentina
England v Australia
Wales v South Africa
Ireland v United States
France v Fiji
Who's who in Yemen conflict
Houthis: Iran-backed rebels who occupy Sanaa and run unrecognised government
Yemeni government: Exiled government in Aden led by eight-member Presidential Leadership Council
Southern Transitional Council: Faction in Yemeni government that seeks autonomy for the south
Habrish 'rebels': Tribal-backed forces feuding with STC over control of oil in government territory
1,000 Books to Read Before You Die: A Life-Changing List
James Mustich, Workman
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Sam Smith
Where: du Arena, Abu Dhabi
When: Saturday November 24
Rating: 4/5
MATCH INFO
Jersey 147 (20 overs)
UAE 112 (19.2 overs)
Jersey win by 35 runs
In numbers: China in Dubai
The number of Chinese people living in Dubai: An estimated 200,000
Number of Chinese people in International City: Almost 50,000
Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2018/19: 120,000
Daily visitors to Dragon Mart in 2010: 20,000
Percentage increase in visitors in eight years: 500 per cent