Exercising in a gymnasium is always something out of the question for me. It is not because I did not like to exercise, but I disliked going to the gym because I felt constricted, felt that I was doing labour work more than I was enjoying my time, and was never able to keep up with the more physically fit people who ran for 90 minutes on a treadmill or lifted heavy weights. Yes, I have a strong competitive gene.
My friends argued and said that I was making a big deal out of nothing. They told me to just go to the gym, do some cardio exercise, lift a couple of small weights and leave, just like they did, and that I did not need to be an exercise maniac, but use my time there to unwind. "It was not a competition" and I was over-dramatic, they claimed.
Yet my friends failed to convince me to join their gym clan, and instead I decided to focus on horse riding as my way of keeping fit. I love to be around horses. The exercise felt more like an activity, and I enjoyed some nice scenery as I toned up. But even as I did that, I discovered that I did have similar attitude towards it as I did towards exercising in general.
Every time I went to class, I asked my trainer if I could jump higher poles, if he would let me jump double poles, and if I could gallop instead of canter. It was not until he pointed it out that I realised what was really going on in my head.
He told me that I was too focused on the idea of reaching the highest level that I did not enjoy my time at class any more. He would say that I was exactly where I needed to be at the time, that I was doing exceptionally well since the time I joined his class, and that I would get to where I desired to be all in its own time and when I was more than ready for it.
And then it all sunk in. Why was I trying to work at a faster pace when I was not yet ready? Is it so that I felt a sense of accomplishment? Or was it because I did not want to look weak for learning at a slower pace when I was used to achieving so much in a short period?
My trainer's comments served as a wake-up call for me and reflected on my attitude not only towards exercise, but towards my career and small business as well. I wanted to achieve the highest level at my full-time job, and my writing path, and I wanted it fast. When it came to my writing, I compared myself to renowned authors, such as the American author Ernest Hemingway, and wanted to be like him today if not sooner, which was unfair to me, as I ended up stressing myself. And Hemingway himself did not earn his status overnight.
With a slight tweak to my mindset, I developed a new attitude towards my horse riding lessons and eventually my work. I ended up truly "unwinding" as my friends hoped I would when I exercised, and learnt valuable lessons during my time on the saddle:
- Take time to look around and enjoy the place you are in. When you are solely focused on the end goal, you end up losing on the beauty of your journey to get there.
- Accept your current position and pace, and know that you are developing your position and strength, which will yield better future performance once you reached your destination.
- Finally, your desired goal will come much faster and better, when your pace is compatible with your ability.
Being ambitious is great, and is the exact kick people need to reach their desired goals. But patience and doing things at their own pace results in more long-lasting results, with no self-strains and stress along the way.
Accepting your current level and ability does not mean that you should give up or stop yourselves from developing and overcoming your challenges. Instead it means that you should take things slowly and gradually develop your ability, so that when you reach where you want to be, you will be more than ready to take over whatever challenge that pops up.
Manar Al Hinai is an award-winning Emirati writer and fashion designer based in Abu Dhabi. Follow her on Twitter: @manar_alhinai
