Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ll know one of the biggest pop stars alive is descending on Dubai tonight.
Lady Gaga and her 95-strong entourage of make-up artists and hair stylists flew into town on Monday, with her pet French bulldog, Asia, tucked firmly under the singer’s arm.
Did she bring all her wigs? Will she censor her raunchy show, despite her own mantra of breaking taboos and pushing boundaries? And more importantly, will she forget to put on her bottoms (again)?
We can reveal all here about what to expect when the songstress rocks Meydan racecourse tonight with her first UAE show, part of her worldwide ArtRAVE: The Artpop Ball tour.
The show
It’s a rollicking, confetti-blasting, glitter-infested, heart-pumping two-hour rave to which 25,000 people are invited.
Lady Gaga knows how to put on a show – and unlike Madonna, to whom she is often compared (much to Madonna’s chagrin), she is less ice queen and more about the “fan-to-artist” connection, complete with spectacular theatrics to boot.
The singer bursts on stage from below to the sounds of Artpop, the title track from the album that inspired the tour, wearing a spangly bejewelled and bewinged leotard decorated with a blue gazing ball designed by the artist Jeff Koons (the same orb graces the cover of her album).
The setlist veers from new album tracks such as Donatella, MANiCURE and Venus, to old favourites including Poker Face, Paparazzi, Born This Way and Just Dance, which are sure to get the audience gyrating.
Out of deference to her host country, she is likely to tone down the – how can we put this delicately – more suggestive moves accompanying songs such as Do What U Want.
“It will not be censored but it will not be 100 per cent provocative either,” says a diplomatic Marco Rios, the chairman and chief executive of AMI Live, the entertainment firm bringing Lady Gaga to the Middle East.
He admits the show has been tweaked to "respect the local laws". So for all those looking forward, with all the prurience of a Victorian peep-show audience, to the singer's costume change on stage before launching into Bad Romance, you will be sadly disappointed. Lady Gaga will not be getting her kit off in public.
The venue
It has played host to Elton John, Sting and Jennifer Lopez. Now Meydan has been transformed for the arrival of Mother Monster, although our sources tell us she will not be staying in the adjoining hotel.
Without giving an exact figure – but no doubt his wallet is feeling a bit light at the moment – Rios admits that AMI has spent a “massive” amount on preparations for Lady Gaga, which is akin to saying Madonna is getting on a bit.
A 345-strong crew has been working furiously to get the stage ready in time, with 100 tonnes of equipment, from lighting tools to props – and that is in addition to Lady Gaga’s own entourage.
The stadium has been completely overhauled, with two stages connected by catwalks made of translucent Lucite, allowing concertgoers to walk underneath while still watching the show. The main stage resembles a white cave or igloo, which has been compared to Atlantica from The Little Mermaid, with a backdrop of digitised stars.
The outdoor arena will be fully air-conditioned, which will be a blessed relief to all those fans fearing sweltering in the late-summer humidity.
Tickets were still available this week and the venue looks far from sold out. In comparison, tickets for Gaga’s UK dates were reportedly snapped up within five minutes of going on sale.
The outfits
Octopuses can breathe easy – no molluscs will be harmed in the making of this show (we’re not counting the backstage buffet).
Lady Gaga’s infamous latex polka dot outfit with tentacles has been ditched from the Dubai show. Rios says it was logistically impossible to bring everything from previous shows in Australia, the US and South Korea.
Luckily, it was just one of about seven get-ups that become increasingly bizarre as the night went on, from a seashell bikini top and oversized wig to a range of masks and headpieces – and, of course, the anime-inspired atrocity with multicoloured furry leg warmers and dreadlocked bunches to match.
It wouldn’t be Gaga without a unique twist on fashion. Offstage, she has had a propensity of late to forget to dress her bottom half (see every outing in Sydney; Korea and the New York Mets game, where she turned up in her underwear and a leather jacket).
We would expect nothing less though from the princess of pop, who infamously wore a meat dress with a matching jaunty hat made entirely of the flesh of dead animals at the 2010 MTV Video Music Awards.
The fans
According to the Urban Dictionary, Little Monsters “live and breathe Lady Gaga. We make clothes out of random household materials and spend hours learning her dances”.
Being a little wacky and off-kilter is no bar to joining this unique clan – in fact, it’s positively welcomed. Mother Monster embraces high-school geeks and techy nerds alike with a mantra of feeling the love.
We blame her for encouraging her fans’ obsession. Previous concerts have featured her inviting fans who throw stuffed toys embedded with such poetic messages as “I love you sooooo much!” at her to join her on stage or backstage. So if you pelt her with a heartfelt letter about how you were snubbed at the age of 4 or are depressed about losing your toy bear Snuggles, there’s a good chance you might get a private audience.
Some fans’ insane devotion has even landed them a mention in the newspapers. Ian Clark, for example, named his daughter after the star, while Jo Muir spent six days camping outside the Langham hotel in London, where Lady Gaga was staying, just for a glimpse of the singer.
“My friends and family all think I’m crazy,” Muir laughed manically, “but I think it’s worth it.”
The rider
No pop legend can earn her diva stripes without a few extreme demands. In 2009, before hitting the big time, Lady Gaga contented herself with a few cans of Dr Pepper.
These days her rider extends to 14 pages, which include demands for Bran Flakes and Special K without berries or raisins, organic teas, peanut butter with flax seed, sprouted grain tortillas and homemade guacamole.
She also insists on white leather sofas, fresh white, yellow or lavender roses, black-satin drapes and a mannequin with a puffy pink wig, according to court papers during a 2012 lawsuit involving her former assistant Jennifer O’Neill. Expect more explosive revelations when O’Neill publishes her tell-all book.
The critics
Reviews of the show so far – the tour has already covered much of the US and Canada and will go on to Europe after Dubai – have been a bit of a mixed bag.
August Brown of the LA Times says: "Gaga, once at the vanguard of high fashion, feminism and deliciously low-brow electro-pop, seems to have thrown her lot in with a contemporary EDM [electronic dance music] culture that was already kind of a cliché on arrival."
Jon Caramanica of The New York Times felt she was "still a fearsome singer when she chooses to be, which is to say rarely on records but often in concerts".
Alexis Petridis of The Guardian wrote: "Informing the world in 2013 that you've birthed the idea to blend visual art with pop music feels a bit like grandly announcing you've had a brainwave to mix jazz and funk, or thrash and metal.
“The urge to take Lady Gaga gently by the arm and explain to her that a few people had actually come up with the idea before was hard to suppress.”

