Dear Ali: I was shocked when my friend refused to accept a gift of a gold men’s watch. Do men here not like gold gifts? GG, Italy
Dear GG: That’s a generous gift, and I’m sure your friend appreciated your attention, but yes, this isn’t an appropriate gift in our culture.
Even though the UAE is a popular destination for lovers of gold, our religious teachings and culture don’t advise men to wear gold jewellery – it’s a privilege for women only.
Men can own or buy gold for trading or investment reasons, but never for adornment. Many Arab or Asian men do wear gold as part of their own religion or cultural background – for example, some of my Indian friends wear a wedding ring. They come from different religious background, and we respect that, because we understand that in their culture this is acceptable and normal.
When you want to give a gift to a man, a genuine leather wallet would be a more successful choice. But a silver watch would also work – it’s fine to wear silver in Islamic and Arab culture.
Dear Ali: My office is next to mosques, and every time there’s a call to prayer, I see men coming from all over the area, but not usually women. How often do women go to the mosque to pray or are they not allowed? AC, Abu Dhabi
Dear AC: Generally it’s recommended that men complete their daily five prayers at mosques, but it’s also understood that it’s not possible when there isn’t a mosque nearby or when someone isn’t able to make it on time to the prayers each day. There are various opinions from the different sectors of the Islamic community with regard to this subject, but all agree that going to the mosque to pray is essential if you can.
Women aren’t obliged to pray at a mosque. Women in general are busy with children and work at home, so it’s easier for them to pray there. This doesn’t mean women don’t have to pray – praying is a requirement for men and women. Men prefer praying in a mosque – it’s believed that it’s rewarded by blessings in their life.
We do have one day in the week – Friday – when all physically able men have to gather in groups to perform one collective prayer. Our religion allows women to stay at home to perform their prayers, even on Fridays. However, if a woman can leave her home and go to a mosque, it will be positively met.
Some families collectively visit the mosque for Friday prayers. This happens in many countries around the world, not only in Arabia. In the mosque, women pray in a separate area that men aren’t allowed to enter, though women can usually see and hear the men when they’re praying.
Every mosque has separate female praying areas, usually on the opposite side of the mosque to the men’s entrance.
One of the reasons you don’t see women entering the mosque might be that their entrance is on the other side.
Ali Al Saloom is a cultural adviser and public speaker from the UAE. Follow @AskAli on Twitter, and visit www.ask-ali.com to ask him a question.
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