With regard to Sarah Khamis's article (We disapprove of adultery in the UAE, but it happens quite a lot, January 29), I believe this is a global issue and not about any single nationality.
To fulfill some men’s need for multiple partners, they quote Islam to say they are allowed four wives. But they should get their facts right – there are indeed some situations where there is an option of getting another wife if the first was infertile or sick, but it did not mean compromising on her welfare but does mean treating her with respect.
I am single and I feel scared about getting married because many men seem untrustworthy. They are with you until they develop a liking for someone else. Men need to understand that the institution of marriage requires life-long trust and commitment.
Many men argue that because women now work, they are rebellious. I disagree. It’s simply a sense of independence. Before, women would tolerate everything for the sake of family honour and their children because they were not educated or independent enough to understand their rights and take care of themselves.
My final words would be to teach young men the value of marriage.
Almas Muhammad Shafiq, Ajman
It seems to me that the reasons behind infidelity are when communication is a problem.
We live in a very gender-individualist culture. However when a man and a woman get married, that individualism should transform and become a single entity for both spouses to co-exist happily.
Good communication is a key factor in any happy marriage. What marriage doesn’t go through a struggle at some point? But when it comes to the point where a spouse would cheat on their life partner then you have a clear boundary.
Contrary to what is happening now, marriage is not something that should be easy to go into and easy to get out of. This issue must be resolved because it is destroying the building blocks of the community.
I believe it begins with pre-marital counselling, including breaking the gender-individualism that exists between men and women.
Name withheld by request
I believe the solution starts with respecting one’s spouse and oneself enough to understand the harm that befalls both in cases of infidelity.
There needs to be education from an early age to teach respect for others, trust within a relationship and control over sexual desires.
We are not cave men or women who are trying to create society – we are already there.
Jen Bishop, Abu Dhabi
As an Emirati, at this point in my life, I’d rather divorce than share my husband.
Noora AlMulla, Malaysia
Domestic abuse calls for action
In relation to your editorial, Time to break the silence on family abuse in the UAE (January 29), I believe the problem arises when people choose to ignore domestic abuse, thinking it to be a private affair.
Even today, countless women are physically abused behind closed doors while their neighbours choose not to get involved.
Instead of reporting these acts of violence or offering help, most of us turn away, which further encourages domestic violence. Such cases should be reported immediately and victims of domestic abuse should come forward and seek help.
Most women do not involve the authorities out of fear this would result in divorce. But it is important these women understand that not fighting against injustice is equivalent to supporting a crime. Domestic abuse should not be tolerated under any circumstances.
Fatima Suhail, Sharjah
There has to be zero tolerance of domestic abuse. If you can’t feel safe in your own home then where can you?
Clare Stephens, Al Ain
Every individual should have the right to protection from domestic abuse, whether it be psychological or physical.
Name withheld by request
Doctor’s gaffe shook my faith
After reading your story, Expats prefer medical treatment outside UAE, survey finds (January 25), it reminded me why my faith in the medical services is so low.
I went to one doctor who touted his American qualifications and sought his opinion about my swollen foot.
He told me my shoe was too tight. My shoe was tight because my foot was swollen, not the other way around.
It turned out I had a fracture, but it left me hesitant to seek medical advice in the UAE.
Name withheld by request
