The star of Emmy Award-winning HBO series Big Little Lies is not Reese Witherspoon, Nicole Kidman or Shailene Woodley. Nor is it Meryl Streep, who has joined the cast for season two. No, as everyone knows, the undoubted star of Big Little Lies is the real estate – those sprawling white mansions plonked along the Monterey shoreline with more rooms than a budget hotel (and only marginally more taste).
None of these is more impressive, of course, than the one owned by Witherspoon’s character, Madeline Martha Mackenzie, she of the unforgettable line: “I love my grudges. I tend to them like little pets.”
Where are we going with all this? Well, it turns out that, courtesy of Malibu Luxury Vacation Homes, you can now rent this very property and live out all your Big Little Lies fantasies. Before you all get too excited and crash the server, though, there are two things to note. Firstly, this property is not actually located in Monterey at all; it's on Broad Beach Road in Malibu. And secondly, it costs somewhere between $3,000 and $5,000 per night.
But whatever – you’re just here to have a peek inside, right? So let’s get on with telling you about the place. First up, here are a few basic facts: there is a 60,000 square foot main house and a detached 950 square foot guest house. Overall, there are seven bedrooms and eight bathrooms but 12 people can easily sleep here (helpful for splitting the cost; fill the place up and it works out at around $416 a night per person). “Drift off and wake to the sound of waves from every bedroom,” the website promises. You’d hope so.
Try and bag the upstairs master bedroom if you can, it has a private deck with an outdoor fireplace. By comparison, the downstairs master has two walk-in closets and a steam shower.
What else, what else? There is a breakfast bar, a dining room with an ocean view (obviously), a flat screen television in every room and… two dishwashers (not in every room). There is even a "fully stocked pantry", so you won't have to go and pick up the groceries when you arrive for your holiday.
That’s the interior just about covered but the real action takes place outside, where you will find a private beach, a hot tub and a vast patio, where you can nibble an olive, make snide remarks about your friends and watch the sun dip down into the Pacific Ocean. Just like Madeline Martha Mackenzie.
If all of that appeals, you can apply to rent this property at www.malibuluxuryvacationhomes.com. Otherwise, you'll just have to make do with watching the show from the (relative) comfort of your own pokey little home.