Job negativity often betrays inner angst

Analyse your personal life before you blame your misery at work entirely on your job.

I was at a forum a few weeks ago, where the speaker discussed the importance of having a career that you feel passionate about. He looked to his right at me and then told the audience how I am a person who is passionate about my line of work and that it shows on my face.

Later I discovered that he was able to interpret a person’s energy, and thus was able to point me out as a good example of someone who enjoys their chosen career path.

Nevertheless, he was right. I wake up every morning with the drive and energy to build my career and business and, unlike many, I actually look forward to the work tasks I have for the day ahead. A conversation with an acquaintance where she pointed out how we end up loving our lives when we love our jobs highlighted this too.

The number of hours we spend in the office versus the time we spend outside of it can have an effect on our life and overall mood. If someone hates their job, you will see that negatively affect their behaviour, leading them to constantly complain.

Some will moan to anyone they meet about how bad their job is and will openly declare they want a change. “Are you hiring?” is often the first question that escapes their lips the moment they meet a potential employer. Others prefer to suffer in silence. They will not utter a word, but you can sense they loathe their jobs simply from their body language. In either case, they are miserable.

But it is important to understand why they hate the place they work. When some of my friends complain about their jobs, I often dig deeper to find the real reason causing their misery. In some cases, something in their personal life is to blame yet they shift their unhappiness on to their work.

So what can be done to kick that dark cloud of misery away once and for all?

First and foremost, stop complaining if only for the sake of your own psyche. Although some research states it is good to vent to friends and close family members, constant negativity can eat into your valuable personal time, leaving you in a dark mood for longer than you need to be.

Also, if you gossip or moan at work, you do not want to risk your reputation by being labelled as the person badmouthing the company. This could have a negative effect on your promotion and career progression. I have noticed some who relentlessly complain about their work become so caught up in their negative whirlwind, they are unable to say anything positive about their job.

Of course, certain work dilemmas can be so unbearable that you are unable to stay put and not complain about it to your colleagues whom you may consider your second family. But it is important to dig to the root of the problem to find out the real source of the issue, which takes me to my second point.

Be honest with yourself. Sit down and figure out why you really hate your job. Is it because of your work colleagues? Manager? Or is the issue closer to home? Everyone faces problems, and most of these can be very personal. If you have an unresolved issue outside of work, then changing your job may not solve it for you. The change may bring relief at first, but soon enough that relief will wear off and you will be left once more with your misery.

Also, it can be liberating to realise that the cause of the problem has to do with you and your inability to resolve a personal issue. Why? Because that gives you control over the situation.

And this takes us to the final and most important point; once you have realised the cause of your discontent, take control. Working towards an end goal increases your happiness, and you will feel that you have control over your situation. Set a deadline and goal - whether it is for a promotion, career change, or resolving a personal issue that has been bothering you. Surround yourself by motivating people, and work directly towards your goal.

We can all go through a love-hate relationship with our work, sometimes with more hate involved than love. Instead of dwelling on the situation, find out what is really bothering you. It is ironic how sometimes resolving an issue closer to home can unblock the supply of love towards our job.

Manar Al Hinai is an award-winning Emirati writer based in Abu Dhabi. Follow her on Twitter: @manar_alhinai

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