Ask Ali: Why do Emirati men do the grocery shopping?

In this week's Ask Ali we learn about why it seems that mostly Emirati men do the grocery shopping and what a picture of a coffee jug represents in the Gulf?

Dear Ali: I'm a European woman living in Dubai. Every time I go shopping for groceries, I notice there aren't many Emirati women doing the shopping – it's the men. Can you explain this to me? DI, Dubai

Dear DI: In our culture, women are treated as real queens.

It would be strange for a queen to go and do the grocery shopping, wouldn’t it?

OK, enough with my cheesy lines. I’m not going to say that all women don’t go shopping to get groceries – my mother still does it and my older sister still enjoys it.

You see, grocery shopping in our understanding is not an easy task. It takes time, energy and often requires manpower to carry the bags. Moreover, we’re used to comforting our women by allowing them to skip the market crowds so that they can stay at home.

Yes, nowadays our supermarkets have assistants, who help every customer who needs it. If a lady comes to the store, she will get help. But the majority of men still consider grocery shopping to be their own duty.

It’s a matter of care, which hardly anyone can refuse if a male family member offers help by saying: “Don’t bother yourself, I’ll get everything you need from that supermarket.”

I’m sure most women enjoy shopping in general – that’s why you can see many of them in the malls’ fashion boutiques, buying new outfits for themselves, their children and other family members, spending long hours there. And you see men walking with these women at the malls.

Perhaps unlike grocery shops, those shops are designed to make the whole shopping process enjoyable, so we men don’t need to be involved.

Dear Ali: Why is a picture of a coffee jug representative of hospitality in the Gulf? DF, Australia

Dear DF: Traditionally in the Gulf, all guests are greeted with Arabic coffee served in a coffee pot, or dallah as it’s called here.

The coffee or tea that’s served is not necessarily to be drunk, but traditionally guests have to be served it on entry into a house. We inherited this art of hospitality from our past.

When our fathers had no variety of food or drinks, the coffee pot was always filled to treat any person who might come. It became a symbol of Arab hospitality, popular for its warm welcome.

Any place where we see a dallah gives us a warm feeling. That’s why you can see the dallah as a part of the interior decor of public places and even outside in the streets – for example, as a huge sculpture in the middle of a roundabout.

Ali Al Saloom is a cultural adviser and public speaker from the UAE. Follow @AskAli on Twitter, and visit www.ask-ali.com to ask him a question and to find his guidebooks to the UAE, priced at Dh50.