Nowadays, over lunch and dinner, I make my husband repeat a litany of compliments.
"You look beautiful, my darling," he tells me as I fork in some rice and vegetables. "The broccoli in particular makes your skin glow like the surface of the moon."
And then he loses interest and says, more in character, "Yada yada yada … you know what I mean."
This isn't some new form of torture that I have invented and implemented on my husband. By showering me with compliments he is, in fact, playing the role of supportive spouse. He is helping his wife steer through some clear and present danger.
I speak now, of course, of Deepavali (that's the correct Sanskrit spelling, unlike the anglicised "Diwali"), India's largest holiday, which occurs tomorrow.
Deepavali represents the sum of all my fears, because it - like every other holiday or festival - involves prayer, community, family and, above all, feasting - on highly calorific, ghee-laden sweets.
Every year before the holiday season, I go into a minor panic about how to control my food intake.
I make wild, grandiose resolutions - stop eating dinner, eat only raw food, drink two spoonfuls of virgin coconut oil in the morning - all in the hope of controlling my weight, even losing some.
But these resolutions don't last for more than a day or two.
Finally, I decided to go to the root cause of it all: my discipline or lack thereof.
Thanks to my Dad, I have been blessed with a high metabolism. Growing up in India, I was one of those super-skinny girls everyone pitied. "Oh, poor thing, she looks like a scarecrow," my aunts would say. "Give her raw eggs beaten with some milk every morning. That will round her out a bit," they would advise my mother, who would faithfully follow all their recipes.
Have you ever drunk raw eggs with milk for days on end? If so, you'll know my pain.
Of course, my mother needn't have worried. Age caught up with me. These days, it has rounded me out as my aunts wanted. Nowadays, I have the same problem that everyone does: how to lose weight.
But this year, unlike every other year, I have a plan, which came after I read a book called Willpower. In it, authors Roy Baumeister and John Tierney describe how "ego depletion", or feeling bad about yourself, can cause you to lose your willpower and thereby indulge in a frenzy of chocolates at midnight or pastries by the dining table. Physical tiredness can do the same thing, the book says.
Late in the evening, after an exhausting day, it is harder to resist the clarion call of a triple scoop of ice cream. To resist temptation, you have to be fit and energetic, to feel good about yourself.
I decided to tackle the second component first. Since I am a rather shallow person who depends on the external world for validation, I decided to nab the nearest sucker to conduct this experiment. Ergo, the continual compliments from my spouse.
Since the mate in question is of the strong, silent ilk, I typed out a four-page list of compliments that he merely needed to memorise and spit out.
"I cannot believe how much discipline you have," is one. Variations of "you look beautiful" comprised the bulk of the first page. To write this page, I merely looked in the thesaurus for synonyms of the word beautiful: appealing, ravishing, gorgeous, cute, pretty, resplendent, foxy and, my personal favourite, pulchritudinous. "Honey, you look pulchritudinous."
After four days of listening to my husband's mantras, I can tell you that I feel good. Yeah, I feel good.
Really. That's not a chocolate in my hand - at midnight. It's a date shaped to look like a chocolate. Yes, there's a whole box of them. I've built up so much self confidence that I decided I deserve them.
Shoba Narayan is the author of Return to India: a memoir
Company%20Profile
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Jetour T1 specs
Engine: 2-litre turbocharged
Power: 254hp
Torque: 390Nm
Price: From Dh126,000
Available: Now
Five hymns the crowds can join in
Papal Mass will begin at 10.30am at the Zayed Sports City Stadium on Tuesday
Some 17 hymns will be sung by a 120-strong UAE choir
Five hymns will be rehearsed with crowds on Tuesday morning before the Pope arrives at stadium
‘Christ be our Light’ as the entrance song
‘All that I am’ for the offertory or during the symbolic offering of gifts at the altar
‘Make me a Channel of your Peace’ and ‘Soul of my Saviour’ for the communion
‘Tell out my Soul’ as the final hymn after the blessings from the Pope
The choir will also sing the hymn ‘Legions of Heaven’ in Arabic as ‘Assakiroo Sama’
There are 15 Arabic speakers from Syria, Lebanon and Jordan in the choir that comprises residents from the Philippines, India, France, Italy, America, Netherlands, Armenia and Indonesia
The choir will be accompanied by a brass ensemble and an organ
They will practice for the first time at the stadium on the eve of the public mass on Monday evening
THE SPECS
Engine: Four-cylinder 2.5-litre
Transmission: Seven-speed auto
Power: 165hp
Torque: 241Nm
Price: Dh99,900 to Dh134,000
On sale: now
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Three ways to limit your social media use
Clinical psychologist, Dr Saliha Afridi at The Lighthouse Arabia suggests three easy things you can do every day to cut back on the time you spend online.
1. Put the social media app in a folder on the second or third screen of your phone so it has to remain a conscious decision to open, rather than something your fingers gravitate towards without consideration.
2. Schedule a time to use social media instead of consistently throughout the day. I recommend setting aside certain times of the day or week when you upload pictures or share information.
3. Take a mental snapshot rather than a photo on your phone. Instead of sharing it with your social world, try to absorb the moment, connect with your feeling, experience the moment with all five of your senses. You will have a memory of that moment more vividly and for far longer than if you take a picture of it.
Red flags
- Promises of high, fixed or 'guaranteed' returns.
- Unregulated structured products or complex investments often used to bypass traditional safeguards.
- Lack of clear information, vague language, no access to audited financials.
- Overseas companies targeting investors in other jurisdictions - this can make legal recovery difficult.
- Hard-selling tactics - creating urgency, offering 'exclusive' deals.
Courtesy: Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching
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Company profile
Name: Infinite8
Based: Dubai
Launch year: 2017
Number of employees: 90
Sector: Online gaming industry
Funding: $1.2m from a UAE angel investor
The biog
Name: Greg Heinricks
From: Alberta, western Canada
Record fish: 56kg sailfish
Member of: International Game Fish Association
Company: Arabian Divers and Sportfishing Charters
SPEC%20SHEET%3A%20SAMSUNG%20GALAXY%20Z%20FLIP5
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Herc's Adventures
Developer: Big Ape Productions
Publisher: LucasArts
Console: PlayStation 1 & 5, Sega Saturn
Rating: 4/5