The women’s majlis: Being a woman at work is nuanced

Women hate other women. I often heard this claim from classmates at college explaining why they dropped a course with a female instructor; from friends telling me they wouldn’t take a job if they had a female manager; and from co-workers justifying tense relationships with female ­managers.

I work in a male-­dominated environment, and I’m one of a few women working on my floor; there’s an overwhelming presence of male team leaders, directors and heads of division.

When I encounter women in management positions, I find them to be less friendly and to socialise less with their female employees.

Meanwhile, male managers will go on trips with their employees, which increases trust and strengthens loyalty among the team.

Yet I have noticed how friendship between women in the workplace isn’t encouraged.

If I have breakfast with my female colleagues, it’s something we do almost secretly, because nobody wants their manager to know that she left her office to go and get breakfast with some other women.

“You girls sure never seem to run out of things to say,” was one of the comments I received after going to get breakfast with my friends.

It’s a man’s world. One of my female professors said this to us during one of my final classes at college.

She said we young women were blissfully ignorant to this fact now, but when we enter the workforce, places as leaders or managers are limited, and whether you have the qualifications or the experience, men tend to hire other men.

Managers need to focus on the development of their female employees as much as they focus on their male employees, including them in projects and assigning them new tasks, all of which will increase women’s productivity and efficiency.

Those female managers don’t hate other women – they’re simply trying to fit into this platform, which isn’t welcoming towards their gender.

They can’t be friendly to female employees, because any act of kindness towards them will be viewed as taking the side of her fellow woman; they can’t socialise with them, because it’s seen as a waste of time.

Women don’t hate other women – they’re just trying to succeed in a world that puts them second to men, regardless of their qualifications or experience ­levels.

Fawzia Abdul Rahman works for the Abu Dhabi Government.

If you have a good story to tell or an interesting issue to debate, contact Melinda Healy on [e-mail].