Why women curtsy and how fashion and royal rules have dictated the show of respect

From Meghan’s crash course in deference to who Kate, Princess of Wales, does and does not have to curtsy to in the royal family…

US actress Angelina Jolie curtsies to Queen Elizabeth II on being presented with the Insignia of an Honorary Dame Grand Cross of the Most Distinguished Order of St Michael and St George, at Buckingham Palace in London, on October 10, 2014. AFP

Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, curtsies to the coffin of Queen Elizabeth II, next to her husband Prince Harry, inside the Palace of Westminster on September 14, 2022. AFP

British actress Julie Christie curtsies to Queen Elizabeth II, in 1965. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II meets French actress Catherine Deneuve at a Royal film Performance, on March 14, 1966. Getty Images

British royals Charles, then Prince of Wales, and his wife Princess Diana greet Sultan Qaboos bin Said of Oman at Al Alam Palace in Muscat, Oman, on November 11, 1986. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II meets American singer and actress Jennifer Lopez backstage at the Dominion Theatre in London after the Royal Variety Performance in 2001. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II meets US pop star and actress Madonna, at the world premiere of the movie Die Another Day, at the Royal Albert Hall, on November 18, 2002, in London. AFP

US singer Lady Gaga curtsies to Queen Elizabeth II following the Royal Variety Performance in Blackpool, England on December 7, 2009. AFP

Prince William holds the hand of his bride, Kate, as they walk down the aisle and greet Queen Elizabeth II inside Westminster Abbey on the couple's wedding day on April 29, 2011, in London, England. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II meets Yoko Ono during a visit to the Museum of Liverpool on December 1, 2011 in Liverpool, England. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II with Joan Collins at a special Celebration of the Arts event at the Royal Academy of Arts on May 23, 2012, in London, England. Getty Images

Queen Elizabeth II meets English actress Carey Mulligan at a reception celebrating the British Film Industry, in Windsor Castle, on April 4, 2013. AFP

Queen Elizabeth II with US actress Uma Thurman during a Reception for the Dramatic Arts at Buckingham Palace in London, on February 17, 2014. AFP

Mike Tindall playfully tries a curtsy prior to the royal arrival on the first day of The Royal Ascot race meeting, on June 16, 2015 in Ascot, England. Getty Images

The then new leader of the UK Conservative Party, Theresa May, kneels as she is greeted by Queen Elizabeth II, in Buckingham Palace in London, on July 13, 2016. AFP

Then UK prime minister Liz Truss curtsies as she arrives to meet King Charles III, at Buckingham Palace in London on September 9, 2022. AFP

Although Meghan, Duchess of Sussex’s overly dramatic curtsy which has caused such controversy in the recent Netflix documentary about Prince Harry and her is clearly done for comedic effect, there’s no denying it’s a skill the duchess would have had to become familiar with when she married into the royal family.

“I didn’t know I was going to meet [the queen] until moments before,” Meghan said in the docuseries. “We were in the car and we were going to Royal Lodge for lunch. And Harry was like, ‘Oh, my grandmother is here. She’s going to be there after church.’ I remember we were in the car, driving, and he’s like, ‘You know how to curtsy, right?’ And I just thought it was a joke.

“Now I’m starting to realise this is a big deal. I mean, Americans would understand this.”

With many rules in place as to who curtsies to whom, the act, which is the female equivalent of bowing, has evolved over the centuries.

How to curtsy

Deriving its name from the word “courtesy”, the motions of the curtsy and the bow used to be very similar up until the 17th century in Britain, when delineation between the genders became more pronounced.

In the Victorian era, due to the floor-length skirts women wore, a ballet-style plie movement — otherwise known as “second position” — was the common way of curtsying with feet and knees pointing outward and the back straight.

When it comes to the modern curtsy, the weight is transferred to one foot, usually the left, while the ball of your other foot is placed behind and just to the outside of the standing ankle. Eye contact should be maintained as the front knee is bent, the torso kept upright and hands remain at your sides.

“Guests should try to be empty-handed, having put down any drinks or bags,” says British etiquette and behaviour company Debrett’s. “Women should curtsy and men should bow from the neck.”

Rules about who the royal women curtsy to and when

Prince William holds his wife Kate's hand as she curtsies to Queen Elizabeth II inside Westminster Abbey on their wedding day on April 29, 2011. Getty Images

Although a curtsy is seen as a mark of respect, traditionally, the curtsy is to the crown as a whole rather than the individual person. Foreign dignitaries, such as world leaders, as well as British commoners are not required to curtsy, even though some choose to do so.

The rules of curtsying within the royal family are quite complicated and depend on the setting and who is present, which decide who curtsies to whom.

Kate was obliged to curtsy to every member of the royal family, including Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie who outranked her as “blood princesses”. However, if Prince William was present, the York princesses would curtsy to Kate as she then outranked them.

Since the change in her title from Duchess of Cambridge to Princess of Wales, Kate no longer curtsies to Beatrice and Eugenie.

The rules, which in classic British royal family style, were observed but largely unspoken, were officially documented in the Precedence Of The Royal Family To Be Observed At Court, which was drawn up by the queen's private secretary in 2005 following then Prince Charles’s marriage to Camilla in order to ascertain who should curtsy to her.

According to The Telegraph, the document was updated in 2012 following Prince William and Kate’s wedding in order to make it clear that she should curtsy to Prince Andrew’s daughters.