It's never a good thing when everyone on pit row is running towards you screaming. It's even worse if they're carrying fire extinguishers and waving their arms about in mad gesticulations of panic. One's first thought is to wonder whose car is on fire; it's just like when that impossibly beautiful woman smiles at you from across the bar and you crane around to see who she's looking at. The brain - or perhaps it's just my brain - has a way of filtering out impending disaster as well as unexpected joy in equal measure.
Only when those cranial synapses start firing on all cylinders does it dawn on you that it might be you who is aflame. At this point, even the dull-witted will evacuate a car in a hurry. Piloting a massively overpowered car around a racetrack lined with bodywork-crunching steel guard rails has a way of focusing one's attention, but it pales to the sheer singularity of purpose you'll feel if you think the aforementioned automobile's petrol tank is about to explode. Who cares if the car is in park? Who even cares if the car is stopped? Where it might explode is not nearly as important as making sure you're not in it when it does.
Of course, as soon as I exited stage left, it was plainly obvious that something was amiss with my Porsche Panamera Turbo S. Focused as I had been on avoiding the guard rails (I had been greatly concerned about causing any damage to the hyper-expensive Porsche; yes, that's irony), I had somehow missed the great billows of smoke pouring from the Porsche's rear end. And then, just when the shock of all that oily fog subsided, the big V8's quad pipes belched a six-foot plume of flame. I'm pretty sure that wasn't in the brochure.
Said pit crew eventually extinguished the blaze, though not before the right rear plastic bumper cover got seriously singed. After a few minutes of ensuring that no further explosions were imminent, we sat down to that ages-old tradition of bench racing, wondering what the heck had just happened. The blaze may have been extinguished in mere seconds but we ruminated for hours.
What happened, we found out later, is that one of the Panamera's turbochargers (the Turbo S has two) blew a seal, pouring oil into the exhaust system. Unfortunately, the exhaust side of a turbocharger routinely reaches temperatures of 900°C. Since oil burns at 500°C, the result was our impromptu car-b-cue. Covered in the fire retardant from portable extinguishers, clad in melted bumper and dripping hot oil out its tailpipes, the Turbo S was a sorry sight and had to be trailered back to the garage.
"So what's the lesson in this, Dave?" you're asking. "Don't buy a Porsche Panamera Turbo S. Right?"
Well, not quite. In fact, quite possibly the opposite. You see, though, the wonky bearing that caused the turbocharger to go kaput (a German technical term related to rapid dispersement of lubricant), the Panamera's 4.8L V8 was completely unharmed by the conflagration. Despite losing oil for more than half of the 4.03km racetrack I was on (and, yes, I had failed to notice the smokescreen the whole time) with yours truly's foot planted firmly to the metal, the Panamera's internals suffered not a bit.
The reason was simple. Porsche designs all its engines for the worst-case scenarios of racing. One of the byproducts is that the Panamera's engine carries a whopping 9L of oil in its semi-wet sump oil pan, rather than the more common four or five. So, despite my attempt to fog every mosquito in the vicinity, the Porsche never ran out of oil and therefore was never starved of the stuff, which is the primary cause of death in internal combustion engines. Indeed, pretty much any other turbocharged motor would have lunched its engine under the same circumstances.
Instead, the Panamera will get a new turbocharger and exhaust system (it could have been flushed but because the car is brand new, it bears replacing) as well as the repainted bumper cover (even Porsche plastic is tough). It will then drive like brand new (in fact, I am going to drive it post-impeller surgery just to see if the doctors have made it as good as new) as if nothing untoward ever happened.
So the lesson is this: Pray that you never blow a turbocharger. But if you do - and turbocharger failure isn't as uncommon as you might think - hope that you're in a Porsche. Or a car that is equally over-engineered.
Barings Bank
Barings, one of Britain’s oldest investment banks, was
founded in 1762 and operated for 233 years before it went bust after a trading
scandal.
Barings Bank collapsed in February 1995 following colossal
losses caused by rogue trader Nick Lesson.
Leeson gambled more than $1 billion in speculative trades,
wiping out the venerable merchant bank’s cash reserves.
Email sent to Uber team from chief executive Dara Khosrowshahi
From: Dara
To: Team@
Date: March 25, 2019 at 11:45pm PT
Subj: Accelerating in the Middle East
Five years ago, Uber launched in the Middle East. It was the start of an incredible journey, with millions of riders and drivers finding new ways to move and work in a dynamic region that’s become so important to Uber. Now Pakistan is one of our fastest-growing markets in the world, women are driving with Uber across Saudi Arabia, and we chose Cairo to launch our first Uber Bus product late last year.
Today we are taking the next step in this journey—well, it’s more like a leap, and a big one: in a few minutes, we’ll announce that we’ve agreed to acquire Careem. Importantly, we intend to operate Careem independently, under the leadership of co-founder and current CEO Mudassir Sheikha. I’ve gotten to know both co-founders, Mudassir and Magnus Olsson, and what they have built is truly extraordinary. They are first-class entrepreneurs who share our platform vision and, like us, have launched a wide range of products—from digital payments to food delivery—to serve consumers.
I expect many of you will ask how we arrived at this structure, meaning allowing Careem to maintain an independent brand and operate separately. After careful consideration, we decided that this framework has the advantage of letting us build new products and try new ideas across not one, but two, strong brands, with strong operators within each. Over time, by integrating parts of our networks, we can operate more efficiently, achieve even lower wait times, expand new products like high-capacity vehicles and payments, and quicken the already remarkable pace of innovation in the region.
This acquisition is subject to regulatory approval in various countries, which we don’t expect before Q1 2020. Until then, nothing changes. And since both companies will continue to largely operate separately after the acquisition, very little will change in either teams’ day-to-day operations post-close. Today’s news is a testament to the incredible business our team has worked so hard to build.
It’s a great day for the Middle East, for the region’s thriving tech sector, for Careem, and for Uber.
Uber on,
Dara
Seemar’s top six for the Dubai World Cup Carnival:
1. Reynaldothewizard
2. North America
3. Raven’s Corner
4. Hawkesbury
5. New Maharajah
6. Secret Ambition
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Panipat
Director Ashutosh Gowariker
Produced Ashutosh Gowariker, Rohit Shelatkar, Reliance Entertainment
Cast Arjun Kapoor, Sanjay Dutt, Kriti Sanon, Mohnish Behl, Padmini Kolhapure, Zeenat Aman
Rating 3 /5 stars
The five pillars of Islam
COMPANY PROFILE
Company name: Revibe
Started: 2022
Founders: Hamza Iraqui and Abdessamad Ben Zakour
Based: UAE
Industry: Refurbished electronics
Funds raised so far: $10m
Investors: Flat6Labs, Resonance and various others
SPECS
Engine: 1.5-litre turbo
Power: 181hp
Torque: 230Nm
Transmission: 6-speed automatic
Starting price: Dh79,000
On sale: Now
Kamindu Mendis bio
Full name: Pasqual Handi Kamindu Dilanka Mendis
Born: September 30, 1998
Age: 20 years and 26 days
Nationality: Sri Lankan
Major teams Sri Lanka's Under 19 team
Batting style: Left-hander
Bowling style: Right-arm off-spin and slow left-arm orthodox (that's right!)
The specs
Engine: 6.2-litre V8
Transmission: ten-speed
Power: 420bhp
Torque: 624Nm
Price: Dh325,125
On sale: Now
SM Town Live is on Friday, April 6 at Autism Rocks Arena, Dubai. Tickets are Dh375 at www.platinumlist.net
ROUTE TO TITLE
Round 1: Beat Leolia Jeanjean 6-1, 6-2
Round 2: Beat Naomi Osaka 7-6, 1-6, 7-5
Round 3: Beat Marie Bouzkova 6-4, 6-2
Round 4: Beat Anastasia Potapova 6-0, 6-0
Quarter-final: Beat Marketa Vondrousova 6-0, 6-2
Semi-final: Beat Coco Gauff 6-2, 6-4
Final: Beat Jasmine Paolini 6-2, 6-2
Indoor cricket World Cup:
Insportz, Dubai, September 16-23
UAE fixtures:
Men
Saturday, September 16 – 1.45pm, v New Zealand
Sunday, September 17 – 10.30am, v Australia; 3.45pm, v South Africa
Monday, September 18 – 2pm, v England; 7.15pm, v India
Tuesday, September 19 – 12.15pm, v Singapore; 5.30pm, v Sri Lanka
Thursday, September 21 – 2pm v Malaysia
Friday, September 22 – 3.30pm, semi-final
Saturday, September 23 – 3pm, grand final
Women
Saturday, September 16 – 5.15pm, v Australia
Sunday, September 17 – 2pm, v South Africa; 7.15pm, v New Zealand
Monday, September 18 – 5.30pm, v England
Tuesday, September 19 – 10.30am, v New Zealand; 3.45pm, v South Africa
Thursday, September 21 – 12.15pm, v Australia
Friday, September 22 – 1.30pm, semi-final
Saturday, September 23 – 1pm, grand final
Specs: 2024 McLaren Artura Spider
Engine: 3.0-litre twin-turbo V6 and electric motor
Max power: 700hp at 7,500rpm
Max torque: 720Nm at 2,250rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed dual-clutch auto
0-100km/h: 3.0sec
Top speed: 330kph
Price: From Dh1.14 million ($311,000)
On sale: Now
The biog
Born: High Wycombe, England
Favourite vehicle: One with solid axels
Favourite camping spot: Anywhere I can get to.
Favourite road trip: My first trip to Kazakhstan-Kyrgyzstan. The desert they have over there is different and the language made it a bit more challenging.
Favourite spot in the UAE: Al Dhafra. It’s unique, natural, inaccessible, unspoilt.
War
Director: Siddharth Anand
Cast: Hrithik Roshan, Tiger Shroff, Ashutosh Rana, Vaani Kapoor
Rating: Two out of five stars
Simran
Director Hansal Mehta
Stars: Kangana Ranaut, Soham Shah, Esha Tiwari Pandey
Three stars
SPEC SHEET: NOTHING PHONE (2)
Display: 6.7” LPTO Amoled, 2412 x 1080, 394ppi, HDR10+, Corning Gorilla Glass
Processor: Qualcomm Snapdragon 8+ Gen 2, octa-core; Adreno 730 GPU
Memory: 8/12GB
Capacity: 128/256/512GB
Platform: Android 13, Nothing OS 2
Main camera: Dual 50MP wide, f/1.9 + 50MP ultrawide, f/2.2; OIS, auto-focus
Main camera video: 4K @ 30/60fps, 1080p @ 30/60fps; live HDR, OIS
Front camera: 32MP wide, f/2.5, HDR
Front camera video: Full-HD @ 30fps
Battery: 4700mAh; full charge in 55m w/ 45w charger; Qi wireless, dual charging
Connectivity: Wi-Fi, Bluetooth 5.3, NFC (Google Pay)
Biometrics: Fingerprint, face unlock
I/O: USB-C
Durability: IP54, limited protection
Cards: Dual-nano SIM
Colours: Dark grey, white
In the box: Nothing Phone (2), USB-C-to-USB-C cable
Price (UAE): Dh2,499 (12GB/256GB) / Dh2,799 (12GB/512GB)
Kill
Director: Nikhil Nagesh Bhat
Starring: Lakshya, Tanya Maniktala, Ashish Vidyarthi, Harsh Chhaya, Raghav Juyal
Rating: 4.5/5
The specs
Engine: 3.5-litre V6
Power: 272hp at 6,400rpm
Torque: 331Nm from 5,000rpm
Transmission: 8-speed auto
Fuel consumption: 9.7L/100km
On sale: now
Price: Dh149,000
Moral education needed in a 'rapidly changing world'
Moral education lessons for young people is needed in a rapidly changing world, the head of the programme said.
Alanood Al Kaabi, head of programmes at the Education Affairs Office of the Crown Price Court - Abu Dhabi, said: "The Crown Price Court is fully behind this initiative and have already seen the curriculum succeed in empowering young people and providing them with the necessary tools to succeed in building the future of the nation at all levels.
"Moral education touches on every aspect and subject that children engage in.
"It is not just limited to science or maths but it is involved in all subjects and it is helping children to adapt to integral moral practises.
"The moral education programme has been designed to develop children holistically in a world being rapidly transformed by technology and globalisation."
Bridgerton season three - part one
Directors: Various
Starring: Nicola Coughlan, Luke Newton, Jonathan Bailey
Rating: 3/5
TWISTERS
Director:+Lee+Isaac+Chung
Starring:+Glen+Powell,+Daisy+Edgar-Jones,+Anthony+Ramos
Rating:+2.5/5