JoJo Smith formerly worked as a journalist. Courtesy JoJo Smith
JoJo Smith formerly worked as a journalist. Courtesy JoJo Smith
JoJo Smith formerly worked as a journalist. Courtesy JoJo Smith
JoJo Smith formerly worked as a journalist. Courtesy JoJo Smith

Health woes and career tears led to a life of laughs for British comic JoJo Smith


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It's a little ridiculous to hear JoJo Smith describe ­herself as "old". She is vibrant, self-­deprecatingly funny, easy to chat with and ­completely aware of who she is: ­experienced, worldly and a veteran of the comedy circuit, but not "old".

"Well, I was already old when I started – I was 33 when I began doing stand up ­comedy," the 56-year-old says.

Despite appearing to be born to do this, comedy was not Smith's first career choice. The Brit – originally from Preston, a small city in Lancashire, England – had spent 15 years building a thriving career in journalism, and had reached a point where she was feeling burnt out and unduly stressed. She was working 12 hours a day, terrified to take a day off, glued to a keyboard until she could "barely pick up a toothbrush" because of the pain in her wrists.

Mired with these health ­concerns, which forced her to take a year off, Smith ­attempted to recuperate and reassess what she really ­wanted to do.

"I was off for a year, then I got fired," she recalls. "It was great I had a full year of feeling sorry for meself. And people used to go: 'You're funny, you should be a comedian.' I certainly had no burning desire to do that; I knew nothing about it. I didn't know how to learn lines. I didn't know a thing."

Still, Smith is not the sort to shy away from a challenge, even though her beginnings in comedy were rocky.

"Those first few gigs, I'd say my name and then go blank," she remembers. "I had never appeared on stage before. It was new and brilliant."

When she sat down to write material for her first few gigs, she filled four pages of A4 paper and still went blank on stage when it came time to deliver. That is when she began to ­understand how different ­writing stand-up comedy was compared to the ­journalistic writing she had been ­accustomed to.

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"I didn't realise how much writing I needed to do to fill 10 minutes on stage," she says. "I wrote those first four pages and easily read them in 10 minutes, but to perform them would take an hour. That's why I used to go blank; it was so much trial and error in the beginning."

It's hard to imagine Smith ever freezing on stage, ­considering how naturally she manages to elicit a ­genuine laugh. She's part of The ­Laughter Factory's September line-up, performing in venues across Dubai and Abu Dhabi.

She has been doing stand-up comedy for 24 years now, all over the world. And regardless of who her audience might be, there is still the potential for laughs, because as Smith puts it, "life and human experience is the root of our similarities".

"If I've learnt one thing, it's that it doesn't matter where you've gone in the world; we all have similar experiences," she explains. "I've gigged in ­Bangkok, ­Cambodia, ­Australia, ­Scotland, The Hague, weird little places you wouldn't even think of, and I've never been shocked by the audience, because basically we're all the same. We might not speak the same language or look alike, but we all go through emotions and broken hearts."
Despite an early reputation for ­outrageous material, Smith insists that she doesn't change her routine when she comes to the UAE, and rarely had to censor herself these days.

"To be honest, I don't really change very much because most of my material is about myself," she says. "I'm bitter and twisted wherever I am – I don't need to change anything."

Her material, whether she is joking about going through menopause or likening ­relationships to job interviews, is easy to relate to.

"I'd gone through quite a huge chunk of my life ­thinking only I feel like this, then you realise once you find the guts to say something out loud on stage and see people ­nodding – well all right," she says. "At the risk of sounding like Mother ­Teresa, comedy can be quite good for you [and it] shows you you're not alone – you're not the only one to think those thoughts and feel those ­feelings. I'm not trying to change the world, but just help other outsiders feel less outside."

Smith says she knows a little bit about being an "­outsider" herself. When she first started, she says there were only half a dozen or so other women on the comedy circuit in Britain who were making a living and ­perhaps one of two in ­Australia.

"I used to get work just because I was a woman, when whoever was offering me a gig wanted to be politically correct," she says. "Times have changed now, and that's good."

One thing that hasn't changed for her, though, is why she does this in the first place.

"I never earned much from comedy," she says. "I was ­making an incredible salary as a journalist, walking around with my Amex card. That's not what it's like in comedy at all.

"But I've met some ­incredible people and ­travelled all around the world, and I get paid to say what I think. I'm ­unemployable in the real world because ­nobody would pay you to do this."

She relies on her bluntness – a trait common to ­people from the north of England, Smith says – that gets her through a gig and, indeed, life.

"I know who I am," she says. "I've made all the mistakes. I've made enough to laugh about. I know how ridiculous it all is, this thing called life. And I know how to laugh about it."

The Laughter Factory's ­September shows begin on Wednesday, September 6, at the Park Rotana, Abu Dhabi, from 8pm. Tickets are from Dh140 at thelaughterfactory.com

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How Voiss turns words to speech

The device has a screen reader or software that monitors what happens on the screen

The screen reader sends the text to the speech synthesiser

This converts to audio whatever it receives from screen reader, so the person can hear what is happening on the screen

A VOISS computer costs between $200 and $250 depending on memory card capacity that ranges from 32GB to 128GB

The speech synthesisers VOISS develops are free

Subsequent computer versions will include improvements such as wireless keyboards

Arabic voice in affordable talking computer to be added next year to English, Portuguese, and Spanish synthesiser

Partnerships planned during Expo 2020 Dubai to add more languages

At least 2.2 billion people globally have a vision impairment or blindness

More than 90 per cent live in developing countries

The Long-term aim of VOISS to reach the technology to people in poor countries with workshops that teach them to build their own device

QUARTER-FINAL

Wales 20-19 France

Wales: T: Wainwright, Moriarty. Cons: Biggar (2) Pens: Biggar 2

France: T: Vahaamahina, Ollivon, Vakatawa Cons: Ntamack (2)

Analysis

Maros Sefcovic is juggling multiple international trade agreement files, but his message was clear when he spoke to The National on Wednesday.

The EU-UAE bilateral trade deal will be finalised soon, he said. It is in everyone’s interests to do so. Both sides want to move quickly and are in alignment. He said the UAE is a very important partner for the EU. It’s full speed ahead - and with some lofty ambitions - on the road to a free trade agreement. 

We also talked about US-EU tariffs. He answered that both sides need to talk more and more often, but he is prepared to defend Europe's position and said diplomacy should be a guiding principle through the current moment. 

 

Who has been sanctioned?

Daniella Weiss and Nachala
Described as 'the grandmother of the settler movement', she has encouraged the expansion of settlements for decades. The 79 year old leads radical settler movement Nachala, whose aim is for Israel to annex Gaza and the occupied West Bank, where it helps settlers built outposts.

Harel Libi & Libi Construction and Infrastructure
Libi has been involved in threatening and perpetuating acts of aggression and violence against Palestinians. His firm has provided logistical and financial support for the establishment of illegal outposts.

Zohar Sabah
Runs a settler outpost named Zohar’s Farm and has previously faced charges of violence against Palestinians. He was indicted by Israel’s State Attorney’s Office in September for allegedly participating in a violent attack against Palestinians and activists in the West Bank village of Muarrajat.

Coco’s Farm and Neria’s Farm
These are illegal outposts in the West Bank, which are at the vanguard of the settler movement. According to the UK, they are associated with people who have been involved in enabling, inciting, promoting or providing support for activities that amount to “serious abuse”.

The specs

Engine: Four electric motors, one at each wheel

Power: 579hp

Torque: 859Nm

Transmission: Single-speed automatic

Price: From Dh825,900

On sale: Now

Sunday's fixtures
  • Bournemouth v Southampton, 5.30pm
  • Manchester City v West Ham United, 8pm
The specs

AT4 Ultimate, as tested

Engine: 6.2-litre V8

Power: 420hp

Torque: 623Nm

Transmission: 10-speed automatic

Price: From Dh330,800 (Elevation: Dh236,400; AT4: Dh286,800; Denali: Dh345,800)

On sale: Now

The specs

Engine: Dual 180kW and 300kW front and rear motors

Power: 480kW

Torque: 850Nm

Transmission: Single-speed automatic

Price: From Dh359,900 ($98,000)

On sale: Now

The specs
Engine: 2.7-litre 4-cylinder Turbomax
Power: 310hp
Torque: 583Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh192,500
On sale: Now
How much do leading UAE’s UK curriculum schools charge for Year 6?
  1. Nord Anglia International School (Dubai) – Dh85,032
  2. Kings School Al Barsha (Dubai) – Dh71,905
  3. Brighton College Abu Dhabi - Dh68,560
  4. Jumeirah English Speaking School (Dubai) – Dh59,728
  5. Gems Wellington International School – Dubai Branch – Dh58,488
  6. The British School Al Khubairat (Abu Dhabi) - Dh54,170
  7. Dubai English Speaking School – Dh51,269

*Annual tuition fees covering the 2024/2025 academic year

ICC Women's T20 World Cup Asia Qualifier 2025, Thailand

UAE fixtures
May 9, v Malaysia
May 10, v Qatar
May 13, v Malaysia
May 15, v Qatar
May 18 and 19, semi-finals
May 20, final

THE SPECS

Engine: 6.75-litre twin-turbocharged V12 petrol engine 

Power: 420kW

Torque: 780Nm

Transmission: 8-speed automatic

Price: From Dh1,350,000

On sale: Available for preorder now

UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
MOUNTAINHEAD REVIEW

Starring: Ramy Youssef, Steve Carell, Jason Schwartzman

Director: Jesse Armstrong

Rating: 3.5/5

Cinco in numbers

Dh3.7 million

The estimated cost of Victoria Swarovski’s gem-encrusted Michael Cinco wedding gown

46

The number, in kilograms, that Swarovski’s wedding gown weighed.

1,000

The hours it took to create Cinco’s vermillion petal gown, as seen in his atelier [note, is the one he’s playing with in the corner of a room]

50

How many looks Cinco has created in a new collection to celebrate Ballet Philippines’ 50th birthday

3,000

The hours needed to create the butterfly gown worn by Aishwarya Rai to the 2018 Cannes Film Festival.

1.1 million

The number of followers that Michael Cinco’s Instagram account has garnered.

Real estate tokenisation project

Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.

The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.

Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.

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The specs

Engine: 1.5-litre turbo

Power: 181hp

Torque: 230Nm

Transmission: 6-speed automatic

Starting price: Dh79,000

On sale: Now

The Good Liar

Starring: Helen Mirren, Ian McKellen

Directed by: Bill Condon

Three out of five stars

The specs

Engine: Turbocharged four-cylinder 2.7-litre

Power: 325hp

Torque: 500Nm

Transmission: 10-speed automatic

Price: From Dh189,700

On sale: now

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Wicked
Director: Jon M Chu
Stars: Cynthia Erivo, Ariana Grande, Jonathan Bailey
Rating: 4/5
Abu Dhabi traffic facts

Drivers in Abu Dhabi spend 10 per cent longer in congested conditions than they would on a free-flowing road

The highest volume of traffic on the roads is found between 7am and 8am on a Sunday.

Travelling before 7am on a Sunday could save up to four hours per year on a 30-minute commute.

The day was the least congestion in Abu Dhabi in 2019 was Tuesday, August 13.

The highest levels of traffic were found on Sunday, November 10.

Drivers in Abu Dhabi lost 41 hours spent in traffic jams in rush hour during 2019

 

Cryopreservation: A timeline
  1. Keyhole surgery under general anaesthetic
  2. Ovarian tissue surgically removed
  3. Tissue processed in a high-tech facility
  4. Tissue re-implanted at a time of the patient’s choosing
  5. Full hormone production regained within 4-6 months
Napoleon
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%20Ridley%20Scott%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%20Joaquin%20Phoenix%2C%20Vanessa%20Kirby%2C%20Tahar%20Rahim%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%202%2F5%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Hamilton profile

Age 32

Country United Kingdom

Grands Prix entered 198

Pole positions 67

Wins 57

Podiums 110

Points 2,423

World Championships 3

Star%20Wars%3A%20Episode%20I%20%E2%80%93%20The%20Phantom%20Menace
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDeveloper%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Big%20Ape%20Productions%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPublisher%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20LucasArts%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EConsoles%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20PC%2C%20PlayStation%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%202%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A

Women’s World T20, Asia Qualifier

UAE results
Beat China by 16 runs
Lost to Thailand by 10 wickets
Beat Nepal by five runs
Beat Hong Kong by eight wickets
Beat Malaysia by 34 runs

Standings (P, W, l, NR, points)

1. Thailand 5 4 0 1 9
2. UAE 5 4 1 0 8
3. Nepal 5 2 1 2 6
4. Hong Kong 5 2 2 1 5
5. Malaysia 5 1 4 0 2
6. China 5 0 5 0 0

Final
Thailand v UAE, Monday, 7am

APPLE IPAD MINI (A17 PRO)

Display: 21cm Liquid Retina Display, 2266 x 1488, 326ppi, 500 nits

Chip: Apple A17 Pro, 6-core CPU, 5-core GPU, 16-core Neural Engine

Storage: 128/256/512GB

Main camera: 12MP wide, f/1.8, digital zoom up to 5x, Smart HDR 4

Front camera: 12MP ultra-wide, f/2.4, Smart HDR 4, full-HD @ 25/30/60fps

Biometrics: Touch ID, Face ID

Colours: Blue, purple, space grey, starlight

In the box: iPad mini, USB-C cable, 20W USB-C power adapter

Price: From Dh2,099

Formula Middle East Calendar (Formula Regional and Formula 4)
Round 1: January 17-19, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 2: January 22-23, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 3: February 7-9, Dubai Autodrome – Dubai
 
Round 4: February 14-16, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 5: February 25-27, Jeddah Corniche Circuit – Saudi Arabia
THE%20SPECS
%3Cp%3EEngine%3A%203-litre%20V6%20turbo%20(standard%20model%2C%20E-hybrid)%3B%204-litre%20V8%20biturbo%20(S)%0D%3Cbr%3EPower%3A%20350hp%20(standard)%3B%20463hp%20(E-hybrid)%3B%20467hp%20(S)%0D%3Cbr%3ETorque%3A%20500Nm%20(standard)%3B%20650Nm%20(E-hybrid)%3B%20600Nm%20(S)%0D%0D%3Cbr%3EPrice%3A%20From%20Dh368%2C500%0D%3Cbr%3EOn%20sale%3A%20Now%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
WandaVision

Starring: Elizabeth Olsen, Paul Bettany

Directed by: Matt Shakman

Rating: Four stars

John%20Wick%3A%20Chapter%204
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Chad%20Stahelski%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Keanu%20Reeves%2C%20Laurence%20Fishburne%2C%20George%20Georgiou%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E4%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A

The Gentlemen

Director: Guy Ritchie

Stars: Colin Farrell, Hugh Grant 

Three out of five stars

Financial considerations before buying a property

Buyers should try to pay as much in cash as possible for a property, limiting the mortgage value to as little as they can afford. This means they not only pay less in interest but their monthly costs are also reduced. Ideally, the monthly mortgage payment should not exceed 20 per cent of the purchaser’s total household income, says Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching.

“If it’s a rental property, plan for the property to have periods when it does not have a tenant. Ensure you have enough cash set aside to pay the mortgage and other costs during these periods, ideally at least six months,” she says. 

Also, shop around for the best mortgage interest rate. Understand the terms and conditions, especially what happens after any introductory periods, Ms Glynn adds.

Using a good mortgage broker is worth the investment to obtain the best rate available for a buyer’s needs and circumstances. A good mortgage broker will help the buyer understand the terms and conditions of the mortgage and make the purchasing process efficient and easier.