It can be pretty nerve-racking facing up to the TV cameras and a room full or journalists, even for seasoned professionals. Even the most gnarled manager can feel disarmed by a reporter and a microphone. When put on the spot, it’s easy to say the wrong thing, or blurt out the first thought that comes to mind. It also gives us plenty to look back on and laugh at as well. Here are some of the funniest quotes in football. Beckham was a football superstar, gracing clubs like Manchester United and Real Madrid, and is the only Englishman to score at three consecutive World Cups. But he was prone to the odd gaffe too. When asked once about his relationship with his parents, Beckham responded: <strong>"My parents have been there for me, ever since I was about seven."</strong> And he didn't quite grasp the meaning of ‘christening’ either: <strong>"I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don't know into what religion yet."</strong> The former Barcelona and Brazil striker was one of the greatest finishers of all time, and once claimed to have scored over 1,000 career goals, but he contradicted himself when he became player-manager of Vasco da Gama: <strong>"Will I become a coach in the future? No way, I'd never be able to put up with someone like me."</strong> Italy’s players had extra motivation for wanting to win the 1938 World Cup final, with fascist leader Benito Mussolini’s pre-match pep talk kept to a simple: “Win or die.” Thankfully, for the Italians, they did, prompting Hungary goalkeeper Antal Szabo to reflect: <strong>"I may have let in four goals, but at least I saved their lives."</strong> The former Miami Fusion manager was clearly not in the mood to face media scrutiny following a 5-0 defeat, barking at the assembled press: <strong>"I've got nothing to say. Any questions?"</strong> before promptly storming out. The Northern Ireland midfielder struggled to grasp the concept of international football: <strong>"Germany are a very difficult team to play. They had 11 internationals out there today."</strong> A belting analogy of Scottish journalists from the disgruntled German: <strong>"If people had seen me walking on water, you can be sure someone, somewhere would have complained 'look at that Berti Vogts, he can't even swim'."</strong> The dazzling Watford winger revealed his reverse psychology after dribbling past six Brazilians to score a sensational goal: <strong>"The Brazilians were shocked, and I supposed that's why they didn't tackle me, because they thought there was no way an Englishman is going to do this."</strong> The affable Englishman was notorious for getting players' names wrong, but his sunny disposition let him get away with some serious spin after losing while manager at Newcastle: <strong>"Manchester United dropped points, Liverpool dropped points, Chelsea dropped points, Everton dropped points, so in a way we haven't lost anything at all really, although we dropped all three."</strong> He could be a reporter's nightmare, but the spiky Scot was also witty, too. With a teenage Wayne Rooney set to make his international debut in 2003, Strachan quipped: <strong> "It's an incredible rise to stardom. At 17 you're more likely to get a call from Michael Jackson than Sven Goran Eriksson."</strong> Maths obviously wasn't the former Southampton manager's strongest subject: <strong>"When you are 4-0 up you should never lose 7-1."</strong> Same for Ruud: <strong>"We must have had 99 per cent of the game. It was the other three per cent that cost us the match."</strong> The former Leeds United and Australia striker and logic were uncomfortable bedfellows: <strong>"I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league."</strong> The gangling midfielder was a much-derided figure in English football in the 1990s. His manager at Southampton, Dave Jones, gave this assessment of his player: <strong>"He covers every blade of grass out there … but that's only because his first touch is so crap."</strong> Doesn't do superstition: <strong>"I don't believe in superstitions. I just do certain things because I'm scared in case something will happen if I don't do them."</strong> Doesn't do ritual: <strong>"I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock."</strong> Hitting back at wild accusations: <strong>"One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best."</strong> The former Aston Villa midfielder may need a new atlas: <strong>"I'd like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona."</strong> Goodness knows where he thought he was when turning out to play on loan for Rayo Vallecano.