I cannot work out if it is a good thing or a bad thing, or if it is xenophobic to even query it at all. But what happens if Jonathan Trott and Kevin Pietersen score all of England's runs in the Test series which starts next week, and their adopted nation beat their home nation as a consequence?
Can we Englishmen celebrate, or should we feel embarrassed? At least this time there will be a couple of foreign umpires to make it feel less like a South African provincial game masquerading as international sport.
When Trott and Pietersen batted together in the second Twenty20 last month, with no neutral officials required, all 15 people on the field were South African. Which was about as cringeworthy as Pietersen's attempts to prove his Englishness early in his international career by all but devouring the three lions on his helmet whenever he scored a century.
As much as England's dressing room might have a Afrikaans twang at present, they are not as heavily reliant on importing ready-made players as countries from outside the Test elite.
Consider the case of the UAE. Is it right to claim the sport is prospering here?
Superficially, it appears to be in rude health. Even before the International Cricket Council-backed academy at Dubai Sports City comes on stream, or the link-up between the MCC and Abu Dhabi Cricket Club takes root, the game is widely played, and to a high level.
The national team are also basking in the glow of perhaps its finest win to date in first-class cricket, after they picked Namibia's pocket in their own backyard in the Intercontinental Shield on Tuesday.
Yet calling it the "national" team is somewhat of a misnomer. Mohammed Tauqir, whose five second-innings wickets were vital to the win, is the only UAE national in a side otherwise made up of highly committed expatriate cricketers.
The ICC's rules on the subject are more stringent than many other sports. The majority of the players have to have been resident in the country for at least seven years - by which time most will no doubt have established a strong bond with the place.
In rugby, a player only needs to be a three-year resident before he is eligible for the national team.
The Dubai Rugby Sevens celebrated its 40th birthday this week, making it older than the country in which it was being staged. Thanks to expatriates, the game is firmly entrenched here, yet only very recently have Emirati players started to be enticed into the sport.
The UAE population, as a whole, is obviously expatriate heavy, but if the national football team are peopled solely by Emiratis, why can cricket not find a greater balance?
The statement from the Asian Cricket Council last week that the UAE should not consider sending a side of Emiratis to the Asian Games next year for fear they might suffer "embarrassing" results sent out wholly the wrong message. Why have the body tasked with overseeing the spread of the game here not been more progressive in taking the game to the Arabic community, rather than just dismissing them when they do make an effort?
The fact the facilities here are the envy of the non-Test playing world, and the fact Andrew Flintoff deems it a suitable place to call home, seems to have become an acceptable substitute for a development programme that targets Emiratis. If Flintoff never regains his fitness to the extent he can play for England again, and he continues to base himself in Dubai, within four years he would actually qualify to play for the UAE. Now there is a thought.
pradley@thenational.ae
AIDA%20RETURNS
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ECarol%20Mansour%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarring%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAida%20Abboud%2C%20Carol%20Mansour%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%203.5.%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Other acts on the Jazz Garden bill
Sharrie Williams
The American singer is hugely respected in blues circles due to her passionate vocals and songwriting. Born and raised in Michigan, Williams began recording and touring as a teenage gospel singer. Her career took off with the blues band The Wiseguys. Such was the acclaim of their live shows that they toured throughout Europe and in Africa. As a solo artist, Williams has also collaborated with the likes of the late Dizzy Gillespie, Van Morrison and Mavis Staples.
Lin Rountree
An accomplished smooth jazz artist who blends his chilled approach with R‘n’B. Trained at the Duke Ellington School of the Arts in Washington, DC, Rountree formed his own band in 2004. He has also recorded with the likes of Kem, Dwele and Conya Doss. He comes to Dubai on the back of his new single Pass The Groove, from his forthcoming 2018 album Stronger Still, which may follow his five previous solo albums in cracking the top 10 of the US jazz charts.
Anita Williams
Dubai-based singer Anita Williams will open the night with a set of covers and swing, jazz and blues standards that made her an in-demand singer across the emirate. The Irish singer has been performing in Dubai since 2008 at venues such as MusicHall and Voda Bar. Her Jazz Garden appearance is career highlight as she will use the event to perform the original song Big Blue Eyes, the single from her debut solo album, due for release soon.
Auron Mein Kahan Dum Tha
Starring: Ajay Devgn, Tabu, Shantanu Maheshwari, Jimmy Shergill, Saiee Manjrekar
Director: Neeraj Pandey
Rating: 2.5/5
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: HyperSpace
Started: 2020
Founders: Alexander Heller, Rama Allen and Desi Gonzalez
Based: Dubai, UAE
Sector: Entertainment
Number of staff: 210
Investment raised: $75 million from investors including Galaxy Interactive, Riyadh Season, Sega Ventures and Apis Venture Partners
SPECS
Engine: Two-litre four-cylinder turbo
Power: 235hp
Torque: 350Nm
Transmission: Nine-speed automatic
Price: From Dh167,500 ($45,000)
On sale: Now
THE SPECS
Engine: 3.5-litre supercharged V6
Power: 416hp at 7,000rpm
Torque: 410Nm at 3,500rpm
Transmission: 6-speed manual
Fuel consumption: 10.2 l/100km
Price: Dh375,000
On sale: now
Jigra
Starring: Alia Bhatt, Vedang Raina, Manoj Pahwa, Harsh Singh
Moon Music
Artist: Coldplay
Label: Parlophone/Atlantic
Number of tracks: 10
Rating: 3/5
The Year Earth Changed
Directed by:Tom Beard
Narrated by: Sir David Attenborough
Stars: 4
Thank You for Banking with Us
Director: Laila Abbas
Starring: Yasmine Al Massri, Clara Khoury, Kamel El Basha, Ashraf Barhoum
Rating: 4/5
The specs
Engine: 2.7-litre 4-cylinder Turbomax
Power: 310hp
Torque: 583Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh192,500
On sale: Now
The specs
Engine: 1.5-litre 4-cylinder petrol
Power: 154bhp
Torque: 250Nm
Transmission: 7-speed automatic with 8-speed sports option
Price: From Dh79,600
On sale: Now
COMPANY%20PROFILE%20
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%20name%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAlmouneer%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%202017%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounders%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Dr%20Noha%20Khater%20and%20Rania%20Kadry%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EEgypt%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ENumber%20of%20staff%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E120%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestment%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EBootstrapped%2C%20with%20support%20from%20Insead%20and%20Egyptian%20government%2C%20seed%20round%20of%20%3Cbr%3E%243.6%20million%20led%20by%20Global%20Ventures%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Bharatanatyam
A ancient classical dance from the southern Indian state of Tamil Nadu. Intricate footwork and expressions are used to denote spiritual stories and ideas.
Napoleon
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%20Ridley%20Scott%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStars%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%20Joaquin%20Phoenix%2C%20Vanessa%20Kirby%2C%20Tahar%20Rahim%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3A%202%2F5%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A