Singer-songwriter Tom Lehrer once famously declared that “political satire became obsolete when Henry Kissinger was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize”. Now, Al Murray, a popular British comedian, has put his own spin on the genre by declaring his intention to stand for parliament at the general election in May.
Murray has carved a successful TV career acting out the role of a typically xenophobic, bigoted and small-minded Anglophile. Murray has brought his Pub Landlord act to Dubai on several occasions.
Murray’s decision to stand for election as MP in Thanet South is one of careful calculation. It is the same constituency that Nigel Farage, the leader of the United Kingdom Independence party, is also contesting.
Murray’s manifesto, announced last week, is deliberately designed to lampoon UKIP, a party many accuse of being, like the comedian’s fictional creation, comprises xenophobic, bigoted and small-minded anglophiles.
Among the election pledges is a promise to revalue the £1 coin to £1.10 (“thus giving everyone 10 pence more”) and to brick up the Channel Tunnel to prevent further immigration. Murray also pledges to have the UK withdrawn from the EU by 2020, while unemployment is to be made a crime punishable by imprisonment.
To Mr Farage’s credit, he managed to offer a rictus grin and a stilted word of welcome to his new and unwanted political rival. “The Pub Landlord? Now that’s what I call some serious opposition”, he chirruped on his Twitter account last week.
And in truth, scurrilous fringe political parties have a rich heritage in British politics, ever since showbiz personalities realised it was a cheap way to achieve national exposure. Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, The Official Monster Raving Loony Party was a familiar presence at by-elections throughout the country, usually in the guise of the self-styled Screaming Lord Sutch, a former pop singer turned self-publicist.
A couple of hundred votes at the ballot box and a brief appearance on our TV screens when the result was declared was all Lord Sutch ever craved, and inevitably all he ever got. Indeed, he lost all 40 elections he contested.
More recent examples include the Fancy Dress Party, the Teddy Bear Alliance, and the Bus Pass Elvis Party, each of which have flittered briefly across the political landscape without causing much more than a wry smile from politicians and pundits. They have added to the fun, but little more.
But Murray’s intervention in Thanet South could be more fraught. While Mr Farage may be an object of scorn and derision among many at Westminster, for a wide preponderance of traditional working class voters, especially those in the south-east – where Thanet is located and where Mr Farage has a very real prospect of being elected – he and his party are seen as offering a mouthpiece for local views and concerns.
The people of Thanet may not take kindly to seeing their self-proclaimed champion sent up by the presence of a TV comedian, one who arguably has no place in the political arena. Indeed, when another popular (and populist) celebrity, Russell Brand, took the chance on a recent TV political chat show in the nearby city of Canterbury to savage the UKIP leader to his face, he was stopped in his tracks and roundly condemned by a vociferous reaction from many in the audience, for whom Mr Farage is something of a hero. Having been turned upon so unexpectedly, Brand barely opened his mouth during the rest of the programme.
The incident serves as a warning. However highly Murray’s Pub Landlord is rated as entertainment, the people of Thanet may not want him meddling in their affairs. He may go down a storm on TV, but whether voters will see the funny side of things next May is quite a different matter.
Michael Simkins is an actor and writer usually based in London
On Twitter: @michael_simkins
%3Cp%3E%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thenationalnews.com%2Fbusiness%2Feconomy%2Fislamic-economy-consumer-spending-to-increase-45-to-3-2tn-by-2024-1.936583%22%20target%3D%22_self%22%3EGlobal%20Islamic%20economy%20to%20grow%203.1%25%20to%20touch%20%242.4%20trillion%20by%202024%3C%2Fa%3E%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thenationalnews.com%2Fbusiness%2Feconomy%2Fuk-economy-plunges-into-worst-ever-recession-after-record-20-4-contraction-1.1062560%22%20target%3D%22_self%22%3EUK%20economy%20plunges%20into%20worst-ever%20recession%20after%20record%2020.4%25%20contraction%3C%2Fa%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Ca%20href%3D%22https%3A%2F%2Fwww.thenationalnews.com%2Fbusiness%2Feconomy%2Fislamic-economy-consumer-spending-to-increase-45-to-3-2tn-by-2024-1.936583%22%20target%3D%22_self%22%3EIslamic%20economy%20consumer%20spending%20to%20increase%2045%25%20to%20%243.2tn%20by%202024%3C%2Fa%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Tamkeen's offering
- Option 1: 70% in year 1, 50% in year 2, 30% in year 3
- Option 2: 50% across three years
- Option 3: 30% across five years
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
Another way to earn air miles
In addition to the Emirates and Etihad programmes, there is the Air Miles Middle East card, which offers members the ability to choose any airline, has no black-out dates and no restrictions on seat availability. Air Miles is linked up to HSBC credit cards and can also be earned through retail partners such as Spinneys, Sharaf DG and The Toy Store.
An Emirates Dubai-London round-trip ticket costs 180,000 miles on the Air Miles website. But customers earn these ‘miles’ at a much faster rate than airline miles. Adidas offers two air miles per Dh1 spent. Air Miles has partnerships with websites as well, so booking.com and agoda.com offer three miles per Dh1 spent.
“If you use your HSBC credit card when shopping at our partners, you are able to earn Air Miles twice which will mean you can get that flight reward faster and for less spend,” says Paul Lacey, the managing director for Europe, Middle East and India for Aimia, which owns and operates Air Miles Middle East.
RESULT
Valencia 3
Kevin Gameiro 21', 51'
Ferran Torres 67'
Atlanta 4
Josip Llicic 3' (P), 43' (P), 71', 82'
Specs%20
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Red flags
- Promises of high, fixed or 'guaranteed' returns.
- Unregulated structured products or complex investments often used to bypass traditional safeguards.
- Lack of clear information, vague language, no access to audited financials.
- Overseas companies targeting investors in other jurisdictions - this can make legal recovery difficult.
- Hard-selling tactics - creating urgency, offering 'exclusive' deals.
Courtesy: Carol Glynn, founder of Conscious Finance Coaching
Opening weekend Premier League fixtures
Weekend of August 10-13
Arsenal v Manchester City
Bournemouth v Cardiff City
Fulham v Crystal Palace
Huddersfield Town v Chelsea
Liverpool v West Ham United
Manchester United v Leicester City
Newcastle United v Tottenham Hotspur
Southampton v Burnley
Watford v Brighton & Hove Albion
Wolverhampton Wanderers v Everton
Rock in a Hard Place: Music and Mayhem in the Middle East
Orlando Crowcroft
Zed Books
WHAT IS A BLACK HOLE?
1. Black holes are objects whose gravity is so strong not even light can escape their pull
2. They can be created when massive stars collapse under their own weight
3. Large black holes can also be formed when smaller ones collide and merge
4. The biggest black holes lurk at the centre of many galaxies, including our own
5. Astronomers believe that when the universe was very young, black holes affected how galaxies formed
Zidane's managerial achievements
La Liga: 2016/17
Spanish Super Cup: 2017
Uefa Champions League: 2015/16, 2016/17, 2017/18
Uefa Super Cup: 2016, 2017
Fifa Club World Cup: 2016, 2017
Dengue%20fever%20symptoms
%3Cul%3E%0A%3Cli%3EHigh%20fever%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EIntense%20pain%20behind%20your%20eyes%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ESevere%20headache%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EMuscle%20and%20joint%20pains%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ENausea%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EVomiting%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ESwollen%20glands%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ERash%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3C%2Ful%3E%0A%3Cp%3EIf%20symptoms%20occur%2C%20they%20usually%20last%20for%20two-seven%20days%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Napoleon
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TICKETS
Tickets start at Dh100 for adults, while children can enter free on the opening day. For more information, visit www.mubadalawtc.com.
Lewis Hamilton in 2018
Australia 2nd; Bahrain 3rd; China 4th; Azerbaijan 1st; Spain 1st; Monaco 3rd; Canada 5th; France 1st; Austria DNF; Britain 2nd; Germany 1st; Hungary 1st; Belgium 2nd; Italy 1st; Singapore 1st; Russia 1st; Japan 1st; United States 3rd; Mexico 4th
Pros%20and%20cons%20of%20BNPL
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EPros%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cul%3E%0A%3Cli%3EEasy%20to%20use%20and%20require%20less%20rigorous%20credit%20checks%20than%20traditional%20credit%20options%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EOffers%20the%20ability%20to%20spread%20the%20cost%20of%20purchases%20over%20time%2C%20often%20interest-free%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EConvenient%20and%20can%20be%20integrated%20directly%20into%20the%20checkout%20process%2C%20useful%20for%20online%20shopping%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EHelps%20facilitate%20cash%20flow%20planning%20when%20used%20wisely%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3C%2Ful%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECons%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cul%3E%0A%3Cli%3EThe%20ease%20of%20making%20purchases%20can%20lead%20to%20overspending%20and%20accumulation%20of%20debt%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EMissing%20payments%20can%20result%20in%20hefty%20fees%20and%2C%20in%20some%20cases%2C%20high%20interest%20rates%20after%20an%20initial%20interest-free%20period%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3EFailure%20to%20make%20payments%20can%20impact%20credit%20score%20negatively%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3Cli%3ERefunds%20can%20be%20complicated%20and%20delayed%0D%3C%2Fli%3E%0A%3C%2Ful%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cem%3ECourtesy%3A%20Carol%20Glynn%3C%2Fem%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
How to apply for a drone permit
- Individuals must register on UAE Drone app or website using their UAE Pass
- Add all their personal details, including name, nationality, passport number, Emiratis ID, email and phone number
- Upload the training certificate from a centre accredited by the GCAA
- Submit their request
What are the regulations?
- Fly it within visual line of sight
- Never over populated areas
- Ensure maximum flying height of 400 feet (122 metres) above ground level is not crossed
- Users must avoid flying over restricted areas listed on the UAE Drone app
- Only fly the drone during the day, and never at night
- Should have a live feed of the drone flight
- Drones must weigh 5 kg or less
The Disaster Artist
Director: James Franco
Starring: James Franco, Dave Franco, Seth Rogan
Four stars
Where to donate in the UAE
The Emirates Charity Portal
You can donate to several registered charities through a “donation catalogue”. The use of the donation is quite specific, such as buying a fan for a poor family in Niger for Dh130.
The General Authority of Islamic Affairs & Endowments
The site has an e-donation service accepting debit card, credit card or e-Dirham, an electronic payment tool developed by the Ministry of Finance and First Abu Dhabi Bank.
Al Noor Special Needs Centre
You can donate online or order Smiles n’ Stuff products handcrafted by Al Noor students. The centre publishes a wish list of extras needed, starting at Dh500.
Beit Al Khair Society
Beit Al Khair Society has the motto “From – and to – the UAE,” with donations going towards the neediest in the country. Its website has a list of physical donation sites, but people can also contribute money by SMS, bank transfer and through the hotline 800-22554.
Dar Al Ber Society
Dar Al Ber Society, which has charity projects in 39 countries, accept cash payments, money transfers or SMS donations. Its donation hotline is 800-79.
Dubai Cares
Dubai Cares provides several options for individuals and companies to donate, including online, through banks, at retail outlets, via phone and by purchasing Dubai Cares branded merchandise. It is currently running a campaign called Bookings 2030, which allows people to help change the future of six underprivileged children and young people.
Emirates Airline Foundation
Those who travel on Emirates have undoubtedly seen the little donation envelopes in the seat pockets. But the foundation also accepts donations online and in the form of Skywards Miles. Donated miles are used to sponsor travel for doctors, surgeons, engineers and other professionals volunteering on humanitarian missions around the world.
Emirates Red Crescent
On the Emirates Red Crescent website you can choose between 35 different purposes for your donation, such as providing food for fasters, supporting debtors and contributing to a refugee women fund. It also has a list of bank accounts for each donation type.
Gulf for Good
Gulf for Good raises funds for partner charity projects through challenges, like climbing Kilimanjaro and cycling through Thailand. This year’s projects are in partnership with Street Child Nepal, Larchfield Kids, the Foundation for African Empowerment and SOS Children's Villages. Since 2001, the organisation has raised more than $3.5 million (Dh12.8m) in support of over 50 children’s charities.
Noor Dubai Foundation
Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum launched the Noor Dubai Foundation a decade ago with the aim of eliminating all forms of preventable blindness globally. You can donate Dh50 to support mobile eye camps by texting the word “Noor” to 4565 (Etisalat) or 4849 (du).
Skoda Superb Specs
Engine: 2-litre TSI petrol
Power: 190hp
Torque: 320Nm
Price: From Dh147,000
Available: Now
Pad Man
Dir: R Balki
Starring: Akshay Kumar, Sonam Kapoor, Radhika Apte
Three-and-a-half stars
AS%20WE%20EXIST
%3Cp%3EAuthor%3A%20Kaoutar%20Harchi%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPublisher%3A%20Other%20Press%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EPages%3A%20176%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EAvailable%3A%20Now%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
British Grand Prix free practice times in the third and final session at Silverstone on Saturday (top five):
1. Lewis Hamilton (GBR/Mercedes) 1:28.063 (18 laps)
2. Sebastian Vettel (GER/Ferrari) 1:28.095 (14)
3. Valtteri Bottas (FIN/Mercedes) 1:28.137 (20)
4. Kimi Raikkonen (FIN/Ferrari) 1:28.732 (15)
5. Nico Hulkenberg (GER/Renault) 1:29.480 (14)
Real estate tokenisation project
Dubai launched the pilot phase of its real estate tokenisation project last month.
The initiative focuses on converting real estate assets into digital tokens recorded on blockchain technology and helps in streamlining the process of buying, selling and investing, the Dubai Land Department said.
Dubai’s real estate tokenisation market is projected to reach Dh60 billion ($16.33 billion) by 2033, representing 7 per cent of the emirate’s total property transactions, according to the DLD.
Company%20profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%20name%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EHakbah%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E2018%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ENaif%20AbuSaida%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESaudi%20Arabia%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ESector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EFinTech%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ECurrent%20number%20of%20staff%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E22%20%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInitial%20investment%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E%24200%2C000%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestment%20stage%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3Epre-Series%20A%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EGlobal%20Ventures%20and%20Aditum%20Investment%20Management%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Heather, the Totality
Matthew Weiner,
Canongate
COMPANY PROFILE
Name: Kumulus Water
Started: 2021
Founders: Iheb Triki and Mohamed Ali Abid
Based: Tunisia
Sector: Water technology
Number of staff: 22
Investment raised: $4 million