Will the Donald Trump talk show be coming to a screen near you soon? (Michael Nagle / Bloomberg)
Will the Donald Trump talk show be coming to a screen near you soon? (Michael Nagle / Bloomberg)
Will the Donald Trump talk show be coming to a screen near you soon? (Michael Nagle / Bloomberg)
Will the Donald Trump talk show be coming to a screen near you soon? (Michael Nagle / Bloomberg)

For The Donald, the Oval Office is slumming it


  • English
  • Arabic

‘Why on Earth would any sane person actually want to be president of the United States?”

I was at lunch recently with an old friend, a longtime television industry executive. He was laying out a complicated but potentially lucrative scenario, in which the current most popular and outspoken figure in American politics, billionaire real estate mogul Donald Trump, drops out of the presidential race to pursue another career path.

“What he needs,” my friend said, “is his own talk show.”

I nodded. My friend is a legendary television producer, a born salesman, with a rat-a-tat-tat speaking style and showman’s delivery right out of old-time show business. I’ve learnt, through experience, not to get in the way of one of his enthusiastic sales monologues.

People like my friend – that is, people who have spent a lifetime in show business – tend to see everything through that lens. Politics, culture, sport, science, religion – to them, all of those things are just extensions of the entertainment industry. There’s no real difference to a true Hollywood veteran between a political leader, a movie star, the Pope and a television chat show host. They’re all just communicators trying to connect to an audience.

"Think about it. Think about it! Who's more influential in this country? The president? Or Jon Stewart (the former host of The Daily Show)? Or even Oprah? You want to really have an effect on the country? You want to change things? Don't waste your time in politics. Don't run for office. Nothing happens in the White House. I'm telling you ..."

He lifted his fork from his salad and began waving it in the air for emphasis. Bits of tomato and cucumber flew off like sparks.

“I’m telling you, we have to get to him and tell him that when he figures out that actually running for president is a seriously expensive and totally boring endeavour, and at the end of it, if you’re successful, then you have to actually be the president, which means everyone hates you and you have zero power to get anything done – well, when he figures that out and drops out of the race, we need to make sure he knows to call us. That we’re waiting. That we’ve got a fantastic deal for him.”

“We?” I asked. I really didn’t notice, in between the flying salad and the rush of the sales pitch, when I had somehow become roped into this scheme.

“I’m assuming,” he said, “that you’re not so stupid as to pass this opportunity up.”

The truth is, I probably am exactly that stupid, but I didn’t want to hear the monologue again – there was already too much food all over the tablecloth – so I just nodded vaguely and asked: “So what are the next steps?”

The next steps, he told me, were to quietly canvass some major advertisers to gauge their interest in sponsoring a daily televised talk show starring Donald Trump to be broadcast in the late afternoons.

A week after our lunch – and a few days after some intemperate and possibly offensive remarks from Mr Trump about women and America’s neighbours to the south – my friend called with the answer.

“Forget it,” he said. “Trump is radioactive. No brands will touch him. He’s offended the one billion people who live south of the border and the one hundred million adult women who live in this country. I called every big advertiser I know. No one’ll touch the guy. Sorry. I guess your idea is dead.”

Somehow it had become – in failure – my idea. That’s why my friend has been such a successful and enduring figure in Hollywood: he knows how and when to assign the credit.

The strange thing is, in the week between our lunch and that phone call, I had come to see the logic of my friend’s plan. Being president of the United States is a pretty thankless job. If you’re coming from a low-level political position it may seem like a terrific career move, but for a billionaire like Donald Trump, sitting behind a desk in the Oval Office, shackled by bureaucratic demands and complicated regulations, unable, thanks to the rules of civil service employment, to give pretty much anyone the sack – well, it’s a steep step down.

And of course we know he loves to talk. So a talk show of his own seems like a perfect compromise. I have to admit I was a bit disappointed to learn that it wasn’t going to happen.

That is, until my friend called me earlier this week. From the enthusiastic tone of his voice I knew that something major had happened.

“Remember my idea? About the Donald Trump Show? Well, it turns out that despite all of the offensive stuff he’s said, he’s still really popular. People like the whole politically incorrect act he’s got going. I’ve had three advertisers call me to take back what they said about him a few weeks ago! This thing is going to happen!”

Suddenly, it was his idea again.

“But it doesn’t look like Trump wants to drop out of the race. In fact, it looks like,” I said, “Donald Trump really wants to be president.”

“Rob,” my friend said with a sigh, “no sane person wants to be president of the United States.”

“I’m not sure we’re saying different things,” I said.

Rob Long is a writer and producer in Hollywood

On Twitter: @rcbl

Kamindu Mendis bio

Full name: Pasqual Handi Kamindu Dilanka Mendis

Born: September 30, 1998

Age: 20 years and 26 days

Nationality: Sri Lankan

Major teams Sri Lanka's Under 19 team

Batting style: Left-hander

Bowling style: Right-arm off-spin and slow left-arm orthodox (that's right!)

Company%20profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EName%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Yabi%20by%20Souqalmal%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EMay%202022%2C%20launched%20June%202023%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounder%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAmbareen%20Musa%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EDubai%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ESector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EFinTech%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EInitial%20investment%3A%20u%3C%2Fstrong%3Endisclosed%20but%20soon%20to%20be%20announced%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ENumber%20of%20staff%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E12%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestment%20stage%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3Eseed%C2%A0%C2%A0%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestors%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EShuaa%20Capital%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Six large-scale objects on show
  • Concrete wall and windows from the now demolished Robin Hood Gardens housing estate in Poplar
  • The 17th Century Agra Colonnade, from the bathhouse of the fort of Agra in India
  • A stagecloth for The Ballet Russes that is 10m high – the largest Picasso in the world
  • Frank Lloyd Wright’s 1930s Kaufmann Office
  • A full-scale Frankfurt Kitchen designed by Margarete Schütte-Lihotzky, which transformed kitchen design in the 20th century
  • Torrijos Palace dome
THE BIO

Family: I have three siblings, one older brother (age 25) and two younger sisters, 20 and 13 

Favourite book: Asking for my favourite book has to be one of the hardest questions. However a current favourite would be Sidewalk by Mitchell Duneier

Favourite place to travel to: Any walkable city. I also love nature and wildlife 

What do you love eating or cooking: I’m constantly in the kitchen. Ever since I changed the way I eat I enjoy choosing and creating what goes into my body. However, nothing can top home cooked food from my parents. 

Favorite place to go in the UAE: A quiet beach.

If you go

Flight connections to Ulaanbaatar are available through a variety of hubs, including Seoul and Beijing, with airlines including Mongolian Airlines and Korean Air. While some nationalities, such as Americans, don’t need a tourist visa for Mongolia, others, including UAE citizens, can obtain a visa on arrival, while others including UK citizens, need to obtain a visa in advance. Contact the Mongolian Embassy in the UAE for more information.

Nomadic Road offers expedition-style trips to Mongolia in January and August, and other destinations during most other months. Its nine-day August 2020 Mongolia trip will cost from $5,250 per person based on two sharing, including airport transfers, two nights’ hotel accommodation in Ulaanbaatar, vehicle rental, fuel, third party vehicle liability insurance, the services of a guide and support team, accommodation, food and entrance fees; nomadicroad.com

A fully guided three-day, two-night itinerary at Three Camel Lodge costs from $2,420 per person based on two sharing, including airport transfers, accommodation, meals and excursions including the Yol Valley and Flaming Cliffs. A return internal flight from Ulaanbaatar to Dalanzadgad costs $300 per person and the flight takes 90 minutes each way; threecamellodge.com

UFC%20FIGHT%20NIGHT%3A%20SAUDI%20ARABIA%20RESULTS
%3Cp%3E%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EMain%20card%3Cbr%3EMiddleweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3ERobert%20Whittaker%20defeated%20Ikram%20Aliskerov%20via%20knockout%20(Round%201)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EHeavyweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EAlexander%20Volkov%20def%20Sergei%20Pavlovich%20via%20unanimous%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EMiddleweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EKelvin%20Gastelum%20def%20Daniel%20Rodriguez%20via%20unanimous%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EMiddleweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EShara%20Magomedov%20def%20Antonio%20Trocoli%20via%20knockout%20(Round%203)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ELight%20heavyweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EVolkan%20Oezdemir%20def%20Johnny%20Walker%20via%20knockout%20(Round%201)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPreliminary%20Card%0D%3Cbr%3ELightweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3ENasrat%20Haqparast%20def%20Jared%20Gordon%20via%20split%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFeatherweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EFelipe%20Lima%20def%20Muhammad%20Naimov%20via%20submission%20(Round%203)%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EWelterweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3ERinat%20Fakhretdinov%20defeats%20Nicolas%20Dalby%20via%20split%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBantamweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EMuin%20Gafurov%20def%20Kang%20Kyung-ho%20via%20unanimous%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ELight%20heavyweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EMagomed%20Gadzhiyasulov%20def%20Brendson%20Ribeiro%20via%20majority%20decision%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBantamweight%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChang%20Ho%20Lee%20def%20Xiao%20Long%20via%20split%20decision%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The Abu Dhabi Awards explained:

What are the awards? They honour anyone who has made a contribution to life in Abu Dhabi.

Are they open to only Emiratis? The awards are open to anyone, regardless of age or nationality, living anywhere in the world.

When do nominations close? The process concludes on December 31.

How do I nominate someone? Through the website.

When is the ceremony? The awards event will take place early next year.

The%C2%A0specs%20
%3Cp%3E%0D%3Cstrong%3EEngine%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E6-cylinder%2C%204.8-litre%20%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETransmission%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E5-speed%20automatic%20and%20manual%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPower%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E280%20brake%20horsepower%20%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETorque%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E451Nm%20%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPrice%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3Efrom%20Dh153%2C00%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOn%20sale%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3Enow%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
UAE v Gibraltar

What: International friendly

When: 7pm kick off

Where: Rugby Park, Dubai Sports City

Admission: Free

Online: The match will be broadcast live on Dubai Exiles’ Facebook page

UAE squad: Lucas Waddington (Dubai Exiles), Gio Fourie (Exiles), Craig Nutt (Abu Dhabi Harlequins), Phil Brady (Harlequins), Daniel Perry (Dubai Hurricanes), Esekaia Dranibota (Harlequins), Matt Mills (Exiles), Jaen Botes (Exiles), Kristian Stinson (Exiles), Murray Reason (Abu Dhabi Saracens), Dave Knight (Hurricanes), Ross Samson (Jebel Ali Dragons), DuRandt Gerber (Exiles), Saki Naisau (Dragons), Andrew Powell (Hurricanes), Emosi Vacanau (Harlequins), Niko Volavola (Dragons), Matt Richards (Dragons), Luke Stevenson (Harlequins), Josh Ives (Dubai Sports City Eagles), Sean Stevens (Saracens), Thinus Steyn (Exiles)

Jetour T1 specs

Engine: 2-litre turbocharged

Power: 254hp

Torque: 390Nm

Price: From Dh126,000

Available: Now

While you're here
The%20BaaS%20ecosystem
%3Cp%3EThe%20BaaS%20value%20chain%20consists%20of%20four%20key%20players%3A%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EConsumers%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20End-users%20of%20the%20financial%20product%20delivered%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDistributors%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Also%20known%20as%20embedders%2C%20these%20are%20the%20firms%20that%20embed%20baking%20services%20directly%20into%20their%20existing%20customer%20journeys%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EEnablers%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Usually%20Big%20Tech%20or%20FinTech%20companies%20that%20help%20embed%20financial%20services%20into%20third-party%20platforms%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EProviders%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Financial%20institutions%20holding%20a%20banking%20licence%20and%20offering%20regulated%20products%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Sole survivors
  • Cecelia Crocker was on board Northwest Airlines Flight 255 in 1987 when it crashed in Detroit, killing 154 people, including her parents and brother. The plane had hit a light pole on take off
  • George Lamson Jr, from Minnesota, was on a Galaxy Airlines flight that crashed in Reno in 1985, killing 68 people. His entire seat was launched out of the plane
  • Bahia Bakari, then 12, survived when a Yemenia Airways flight crashed near the Comoros in 2009, killing 152. She was found clinging to wreckage after floating in the ocean for 13 hours.
  • Jim Polehinke was the co-pilot and sole survivor of a 2006 Comair flight that crashed in Lexington, Kentucky, killing 49.
if you go
Scoreline

Abu Dhabi Harlequins 17

Jebel Ali Dragons 20

Harlequins Tries: Kinivilliame, Stevenson; Cons: Stevenson 2; Pen: Stevenson

Dragons Tries: Naisau, Fourie; Cons: Love 2; Pens: Love 2

Roll%20of%20Honour%2C%20men%E2%80%99s%20domestic%20rugby%20season
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EWest%20Asia%20Premiership%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChampions%3A%20Dubai%20Tigers%0D%3Cbr%3ERunners%20up%3A%20Bahrain%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20Premiership%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChampions%3A%20Jebel%20Ali%20Dragons%0D%3Cbr%3ERunners%20up%3A%20Dubai%20Hurricanes%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20Division%201%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChampions%3A%20Dubai%20Sharks%0D%3Cbr%3ERunners%20up%3A%20Abu%20Dhabi%20Harlequins%20II%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20Division%202%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChampions%3A%20Dubai%20Tigers%20III%0D%3Cbr%3ERunners%20up%3A%20Dubai%20Sharks%20II%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDubai%20Sevens%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EChampions%3A%20Dubai%20Tigers%0D%3Cbr%3ERunners%20up%3A%20Dubai%20Hurricanes%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The five pillars of Islam

1. Fasting

2. Prayer

3. Hajj

4. Shahada

5. Zakat 

UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
DSC Eagles 23 Dubai Hurricanes 36

Eagles
Tries: Bright, O’Driscoll
Cons: Carey 2
Pens: Carey 3

Hurricanes
Tries: Knight 2, Lewis, Finck, Powell, Perry
Cons: Powell 3

Company%20Profile
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ECompany%20name%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20myZoi%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarted%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%202021%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFounders%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Syed%20Ali%2C%20Christian%20Buchholz%2C%20Shanawaz%20Rouf%2C%20Arsalan%20Siddiqui%2C%20Nabid%20Hassan%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20UAE%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ENumber%20of%20staff%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%2037%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EInvestment%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Initial%20undisclosed%20funding%20from%20SC%20Ventures%3B%20second%20round%20of%20funding%20totalling%20%2414%20million%20from%20a%20consortium%20of%20SBI%2C%20a%20Japanese%20VC%20firm%2C%20and%20SC%20Venture%3C%2Fp%3E%0A

The Birkin bag is made by Hermès. 
It is named after actress and singer Jane Birkin
Noone from Hermès will go on record to say how much a new Birkin costs, how long one would have to wait to get one, and how many bags are actually made each year.

What can you do?

Document everything immediately; including dates, times, locations and witnesses

Seek professional advice from a legal expert

You can report an incident to HR or an immediate supervisor

You can use the Ministry of Human Resources and Emiratisation’s dedicated hotline

In criminal cases, you can contact the police for additional support

CRICKET%20WORLD%20CUP%20LEAGUE%202
%3Cp%3EMannofield%2C%20Aberdeen%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3EAll%20matches%20start%20at%202pm%20UAE%20time%20and%20will%20be%20broadcast%20on%20icc.tv%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20fixtures%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3EWednesday%2C%20Aug%2010%20%E2%80%93%20Scotland%20v%20UAE%3Cbr%3EThursday%2C%20Aug%2011%20-%20UAE%20v%20United%20States%3Cbr%3ESaturday%2C%20Aug%2014%20%E2%80%93%20Scotland%20v%20UAE%3Cbr%3EMonday%2C%20Aug%2015%20%E2%80%93%20UAE%20v%20United%20States%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20squad%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3EAhmed%20Raza%20(captain)%2C%20Chirag%20Suri%2C%20Muhammad%20Waseem%2C%20Vriitya%20Aravind%2C%20CP%20Rizwan%2C%20Basil%20Hameed%2C%20Rohan%20Mustafa%2C%20Zawar%20Farid%2C%20Kashif%20Daud%2C%20Karthik%20Meiyappan%2C%20Zahoor%20Khan%2C%20Junaid%20Siddique%2C%20Sabir%20Ali%2C%20Alishan%20Sharafu%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ETable%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20(top%20three%20teams%20advance%20directly%20to%20the%202023%20World%20Cup%20Qualifier)%3Cbr%3E%3Cbr%3E1.%20Oman%2036%2021%2013%201%201%2044%3Cbr%3E2.%20Scotland%2024%2016%206%200%202%2034%3Cbr%3E3.%20UAE%2022%2012%208%201%201%2026%3Cbr%3E--%3Cbr%3E4.%20Namibia%2018%209%209%200%200%2018%3Cbr%3E5.%20United%20States%2024%2011%2012%201%200%2023%3Cbr%3E6.%20Nepal%2020%208%2011%201%200%2017%3Cbr%3E7.%20Papua%20New%20Guinea%2020%201%2019%200%200%202%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
How to apply for a drone permit
  • Individuals must register on UAE Drone app or website using their UAE Pass
  • Add all their personal details, including name, nationality, passport number, Emiratis ID, email and phone number
  • Upload the training certificate from a centre accredited by the GCAA
  • Submit their request
What are the regulations?
  • Fly it within visual line of sight
  • Never over populated areas
  • Ensure maximum flying height of 400 feet (122 metres) above ground level is not crossed
  • Users must avoid flying over restricted areas listed on the UAE Drone app
  • Only fly the drone during the day, and never at night
  • Should have a live feed of the drone flight
  • Drones must weigh 5 kg or less
THREE POSSIBLE REPLACEMENTS

Khalfan Mubarak
The Al Jazira playmaker has for some time been tipped for stardom within UAE football, with Quique Sanchez Flores, his former manager at Al Ahli, once labelling him a “genius”. He was only 17. Now 23, Mubarak has developed into a crafty supplier of chances, evidenced by his seven assists in six league matches this season. Still to display his class at international level, though.

Rayan Yaslam
The Al Ain attacking midfielder has become a regular starter for his club in the past 15 months. Yaslam, 23, is a tidy and intelligent player, technically proficient with an eye for opening up defences. Developed while alongside Abdulrahman in the Al Ain first-team and has progressed well since manager Zoran Mamic’s arrival. However, made his UAE debut only last December.

Ismail Matar
The Al Wahda forward is revered by teammates and a key contributor to the squad. At 35, his best days are behind him, but Matar is incredibly experienced and an example to his colleagues. His ability to cope with tournament football is a concern, though, despite Matar beginning the season well. Not a like-for-like replacement, although the system could be adjusted to suit.

UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets