No shortage of good TV shows - except on my television


  • English
  • Arabic

Twenty years ago, Bruce Springsteen sang that he had "57 channels and nothing on". As a look into the future of television, the Boss's lament was almost prophetic. What he should have said, of course, was "57 channels and nothing on ... except CSI: Miami".

There will surely come a time when television broadcasters will do away with the subtleties of programming and simply have one version or another of CSI playing on our screens round the clock. That day is not far off.

Anyone with a passing knowledge of the region's television stations and channels is well aware of the excruciating number of reruns on our screens every day.

And while no one objects to a couple of viewings of, say, The Hangover, the odd Family Guy episode or Australia's Next Top Model, it's the sheer number of repeats that are driving viewers to switch off their televisions and head to their computers. In fact, it's possible to catch the same show three or four times in a day.

Last week, a "technical" problem meant that shows that were screened on OSN channels did not correspond to the ones scheduled on TV menus. (Note: for certain channels this is a matter of policy). Ironically, far from ruining things for viewers, this probably added a bit of spontaneity. There are few feelings to compare with seeing Dharma and Greg on the schedule only to find out that, well, anything else is playing.

It's not that quality shows are not out there. Far from it. Over the last 10 years, television dramas have enjoyed a golden age just as the quality of films, especially the dismal fare from Hollywood, has plummeted. Shows like The Sopranos, The West Wing, The Wire, Lost and many others have set standards that few mainstream films - with their formulaic, common-denominator plot lines - can match. To be fair, some of these shows have been broadcast regionally, but very rarely with any creativity of programming; Law and Order offshoots and CSIs are the order of the day.

Even comedies, inspired by the groundbreaking UK show The Office, have ditched the canned laughter with brilliant shows like 30 Rock, Entourageand several animated shows reinventing the genre. And yet we are still punished with endless repeats of According to Jim and Yes Dear.

Worse still, repeats are in danger of turning us off some of our favourite shows. Watching Jon Stewart is a rare pleasure these days. But the same, weeks-old episodes three times a day? At best it's lazy programming, and at worst treating your audience, which has few other options, with contempt.

The TV industry in the region has not yet adapted to the flood of content on the internet in the way that the music industry at least attempts to do. The poor programming, and even worse customer service, that service providers offer means that more and more people are likely to turn to Apple TV to download shows just released in the US or the UK, or even stream shows illegally onto their computers. Yes, some would rather break the law than watch another episode of Law and Order.

Which brings us back to CSI: Miami and the increasing possibility of a dystopian future in which David Caruso is forever peering over his dark shades at us. Now, I'm willing to suspend disbelief on many aspects of this show: namely, more people get murdered than actually live in the real Miami; that the technology and time spent on each case makes the moon landing seem like a lark; and that cops on the show seem to live in cribs that hip-hop stars couldn't afford.

But where I draw the line, where logic breaks down even within that fantasy world, is that any human could possibly endure working with Horatio Caine for more than a few hours, never mind eight years. We can only hope that "Mr Wolfe" will one day finally snap and tell his smug, condescending boss what to do with those shades.

And that, for once, would be a show worth watching twice.

Results

Female 49kg: Mayssa Bastos (BRA) bt Thamires Aquino (BRA); points 0-0 (advantage points points 1-0).

Female 55kg: Bianca Basilio (BRA) bt Amal Amjahid (BEL); points 4-2.

Female 62kg: Beatriz Mesquita (BRA) v Ffion Davies (GBR); 10-2.

Female 70kg: Thamara Silva (BRA) bt Alessandra Moss (AUS); submission.

Female 90kg: Gabreili Passanha (BRA) bt Claire-France Thevenon (FRA); submission.

Male 56kg: Hiago George (BRA) bt Carlos Alberto da Silva (BRA); 2-2 (2-0)

Male 62kg: Gabriel de Sousa (BRA) bt Joao Miyao (BRA); 2-2 (2-1)

Male 69kg: Paulo Miyao (BRA) bt Isaac Doederlein (USA); 2-2 (2-2) Ref decision.

Male 77kg: Tommy Langarkar (NOR) by Oliver Lovell (GBR); submission.

Male 85kg: Rudson Mateus Teles (BRA) bt Faisal Al Ketbi (UAE); 2-2 (1-1) Ref decision.

Male 94kg: Kaynan Duarte (BRA) bt Adam Wardzinski (POL); submission.

Male 110kg: Joao Rocha (BRA) bt Yahia Mansoor Al Hammadi (UAE); submission.

Mercer, the investment consulting arm of US services company Marsh & McLennan, expects its wealth division to at least double its assets under management (AUM) in the Middle East as wealth in the region continues to grow despite economic headwinds, a company official said.

Mercer Wealth, which globally has $160 billion in AUM, plans to boost its AUM in the region to $2-$3bn in the next 2-3 years from the present $1bn, said Yasir AbuShaban, a Dubai-based principal with Mercer Wealth.

Within the next two to three years, we are looking at reaching $2 to $3 billion as a conservative estimate and we do see an opportunity to do so,” said Mr AbuShaban.

Mercer does not directly make investments, but allocates clients’ money they have discretion to, to professional asset managers. They also provide advice to clients.

“We have buying power. We can negotiate on their (client’s) behalf with asset managers to provide them lower fees than they otherwise would have to get on their own,” he added.

Mercer Wealth’s clients include sovereign wealth funds, family offices, and insurance companies among others.

From its office in Dubai, Mercer also looks after Africa, India and Turkey, where they also see opportunity for growth.

Wealth creation in Middle East and Africa (MEA) grew 8.5 per cent to $8.1 trillion last year from $7.5tn in 2015, higher than last year’s global average of 6 per cent and the second-highest growth in a region after Asia-Pacific which grew 9.9 per cent, according to consultancy Boston Consulting Group (BCG). In the region, where wealth grew just 1.9 per cent in 2015 compared with 2014, a pickup in oil prices has helped in wealth generation.

BCG is forecasting MEA wealth will rise to $12tn by 2021, growing at an annual average of 8 per cent.

Drivers of wealth generation in the region will be split evenly between new wealth creation and growth of performance of existing assets, according to BCG.

Another general trend in the region is clients’ looking for a comprehensive approach to investing, according to Mr AbuShaban.

“Institutional investors or some of the families are seeing a slowdown in the available capital they have to invest and in that sense they are looking at optimizing the way they manage their portfolios and making sure they are not investing haphazardly and different parts of their investment are working together,” said Mr AbuShaban.

Some clients also have a higher appetite for risk, given the low interest-rate environment that does not provide enough yield for some institutional investors. These clients are keen to invest in illiquid assets, such as private equity and infrastructure.

“What we have seen is a desire for higher returns in what has been a low-return environment specifically in various fixed income or bonds,” he said.

“In this environment, we have seen a de facto increase in the risk that clients are taking in things like illiquid investments, private equity investments, infrastructure and private debt, those kind of investments were higher illiquidity results in incrementally higher returns.”

The Abu Dhabi Investment Authority, one of the largest sovereign wealth funds, said in its 2016 report that has gradually increased its exposure in direct private equity and private credit transactions, mainly in Asian markets and especially in China and India. The authority’s private equity department focused on structured equities owing to “their defensive characteristics.”

MATCH INFO

Newcastle United 2 (Willems 25', Shelvey 88')

Manchester City 2 (Sterling 22', De Bruyne 82')

UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
COMPANY%20PROFILE%20
%3Cp%3EName%3A%20DarDoc%3Cbr%3EBased%3A%20Abu%20Dhabi%3Cbr%3EFounders%3A%20Samer%20Masri%2C%20Keswin%20Suresh%3Cbr%3ESector%3A%20HealthTech%3Cbr%3ETotal%20funding%3A%20%24800%2C000%3Cbr%3EInvestors%3A%20Flat6Labs%2C%20angel%20investors%20%2B%20Incubated%20by%20Hub71%2C%20Abu%20Dhabi's%20Department%20of%20Health%3Cbr%3ENumber%20of%20employees%3A%2010%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
GAC GS8 Specs

Engine: 2.0-litre 4cyl turbo

Power: 248hp at 5,200rpm

Torque: 400Nm at 1,750-4,000rpm

Transmission: 8-speed auto

Fuel consumption: 9.1L/100km

On sale: Now

Price: From Dh149,900

The specs
Engine: 2.7-litre 4-cylinder Turbomax
Power: 310hp
Torque: 583Nm
Transmission: 8-speed automatic
Price: From Dh192,500
On sale: Now
Our family matters legal consultant

Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais

Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.

The advice provided in our columns does not constitute legal advice and is provided for information only. Readers are encouraged to seek independent legal advice. 

COMPANY%20PROFILE
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EName%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EYango%20Deli%20Tech%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBased%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EUAE%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ELaunch%20year%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E2022%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ESector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ERetail%20SaaS%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EFunding%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ESelf%20funded%0D%3Cbr%3E%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
MATCH INFO

Uefa Champions League semi-final, first leg
Bayern Munich v Real Madrid

When: April 25, 10.45pm kick-off (UAE)
Where: Allianz Arena, Munich
Live: BeIN Sports HD
Second leg: May 1, Santiago Bernabeu, Madrid

Formula Middle East Calendar (Formula Regional and Formula 4)
Round 1: January 17-19, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 2: January 22-23, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 3: February 7-9, Dubai Autodrome – Dubai
 
Round 4: February 14-16, Yas Marina Circuit – Abu Dhabi
 
Round 5: February 25-27, Jeddah Corniche Circuit – Saudi Arabia