"An overpass, street lights, smooth roads," says Roger, naming the odd things - odd for us, anyway - zipping past in the taxi. "And an entire windscreen," he adds, looking straight ahead. "One that isn't cracked."
Welcome to central Accra, Ghana's capital and the most city-like city we've visited since Dakar, more likely Marrakech. Our respective routes have brought some minor misadventure: for me, sleeping on the floor of a Western Sahara petrol station, the encounter with the Senegalese pickpocket, a stolen iPod and a failed bag-snatching in Ouagadougou, to name but a few. But nothing, so far, has made me clutch my noggin in woe and despair.
Disaster is never far from one's mind, though. Roger and I met weeks ago in Timbuktu, two solo travellers attempting the same thing: traversing Africa's western flank to Cape Town entirely on public transport. Neither of us have read an account of anyone actually doing this, but Roger has a plausible-sounding plan for navigating the continent's hairy armpit, the recent war zones between the southern Gabon border and Angola, where transport options are spotty at best. There's an area west of Brazzaville in the Republic of Congo we're particularly keen to avoid, where "security" on the train has been turned over to rebels-turned-bandits who call themselves Ninjas.
I reach the ocean in Cape Coast, Ghana, where Roger and I had agreed to rendezvous before proceeding down the coast together. I'd imagined a beach paradise complete with hammocks and fruity cocktails, but Cape Coast is no Koh Phagnan. The town's fort has been turned into a stirring memorial to the thousands of slaves who once languished in its dungeons, but overcast skies and humidity combined with the stench from the town's open sewers make for a stultifying atmosphere. Plus, there is little of the warmth in human interactions I'd found in northern Ghana. Roger is nowhere to be found, but I finally track him down at a resort in nearby Elmina.
Approaching Accra as though it's the last outpost of civilisation before the woolly yonder, we gorge on two-for-one pizzas at Accra Mall while waiting for our Benin visas. We meet up with two Danish women volunteering in Ghana, enjoying drinks and Lebanese food (almost passable) in Osu, the nearest thing central Accra has to a fashionable neighbourhood.
This is still Africa, though. There's a man washing himself from a bucket on the side of the motorway near our hotel - covered in suds, naked as the day he was born, his whole nature exposed to the passing traffic on the capital's main ring road. Later, less than 100 kilometres outside Accra, we pass a body lying face down on the shoulder of the road - yes, a body, though dead or merely sleeping we never learn, for the mini-bus passes without slowing, as though it were the most normal sight in the world.
Our plan is to head to Togo, the sliver of a country between here and Benin, taking in Akosombo Dam and Wli Falls before crossing the nearby frontier. The dam is - well, a huge dam, a pile of earth and rock creating the world's largest artificial reservoir, Lake Volta. The 40-metre cascade in the frontier village of Wli, billed as the highest in West Africa, is powerful enough to make you scream if you stand right under it, but not actually dangerous. That's the whole region in a nutshell, actually.
Here on the edge of Ghana, Roger and I hit our first snag. We've been told that tiny Togo offered visas at the border. Not at this border, says the staff at our German-owned guest house in Wli. We don't believe them, so we check with the young Ghana border guards. They say the same thing. We don't believe them either and insist on asking Togo immigration in person. Leaving our passports at the Ghana post as collateral - for these were single-entry Ghana visas, and getting stamped out would leave us in one of the world's most remote immigration limbos - we walk down a trail through forested hills, one of the loveliest stretches of no-man's-land I've seen.
We soon reach a single bar blocking the path. An old man snoozes in a chair outside a shack. Welcome to Togo.
The old man stirs. An entry visa? C'est pas possible at any price, he says. We're allowed a poke around the Togo village before heading back to Ghana, where the guards hand our passports back with a told-you-so shake of the head.
Hardly a catastrophe. It means an extra day travelling down to the coastal border, crossing into Lome, the sleepy Togo capital, only to head back north for a day of hiking in these same hills. But given the amount of time we've spent going over border crossings, alternative routes and imagining worst-case scenarios in Congo-Brazzaville, Democratic Republic of Congo and the Angolan enclave of Cabinda, it's a small irony that our plans have gone awry so soon.
Roger talks to me of conserving our nine lives. To the best of my knowledge, I haven't died yet, but given the number of near misses, I'm starting to wonder how many I have to spare.
Scott MacMillan is blogging about his journey on his website, www.wanderingsavage.com
MATCH INFO
Everton 0
Manchester City 2 (Laporte 45 2', Jesus 90 7')
The specs: 2019 BMW i8 Roadster
Price, base: Dh708,750
Engine: 1.5L three-cylinder petrol, plus 11.6 kWh lithium-ion battery
Transmission: Six-speed automatic
Power: 374hp (total)
Torque: 570Nm (total)
Fuel economy, combined: 2.0L / 100km
About Krews
Founder: Ahmed Al Qubaisi
Based: Abu Dhabi
Founded: January 2019
Number of employees: 10
Sector: Technology/Social media
Funding to date: Estimated $300,000 from Hub71 in-kind support
Company%C2%A0profile
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The specs
Engine: 3.0-litre six-cylinder turbo
Power: 398hp from 5,250rpm
Torque: 580Nm at 1,900-4,800rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed auto
Fuel economy, combined: 6.5L/100km
On sale: December
Price: From Dh330,000 (estimate)
The biog
Favourite hobby: taking his rescue dog, Sally, for long walks.
Favourite book: anything by Stephen King, although he said the films rarely match the quality of the books
Favourite film: The Shawshank Redemption stands out as his favourite movie, a classic King novella
Favourite music: “I have a wide and varied music taste, so it would be unfair to pick a single song from blues to rock as a favourite"
Abaya trends
The utilitarian robe held dear by Arab women is undergoing a change that reveals it as an elegant and graceful garment available in a range of colours and fabrics, while retaining its traditional appeal.
Ultra processed foods
- Carbonated drinks, sweet or savoury packaged snacks, confectionery, mass-produced packaged breads and buns
- margarines and spreads; cookies, biscuits, pastries, cakes, and cake mixes, breakfast cereals, cereal and energy bars;
- energy drinks, milk drinks, fruit yoghurts and fruit drinks, cocoa drinks, meat and chicken extracts and instant sauces
- infant formulas and follow-on milks, health and slimming products such as powdered or fortified meal and dish substitutes,
- many ready-to-heat products including pre-prepared pies and pasta and pizza dishes, poultry and fish nuggets and sticks, sausages, burgers, hot dogs, and other reconstituted meat products, powdered and packaged instant soups, noodles and desserts.
The Bio
Favourite place in UAE: Al Rams pearling village
What one book should everyone read: Any book written before electricity was invented. When a writer willingly worked under candlelight, you know he/she had a real passion for their craft
Your favourite type of pearl: All of them. No pearl looks the same and each carries its own unique characteristics, like humans
Best time to swim in the sea: When there is enough light to see beneath the surface
Inside%20Out%202
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%C2%A0%3C%2Fstrong%3EKelsey%20Mann%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarring%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%C2%A0Amy%20Poehler%2C%20Maya%20Hawke%2C%20Ayo%20Edebiri%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E4.5%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Concrete and Gold
Foo Fighters
RCA records
BACK%20TO%20ALEXANDRIA
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EDirector%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ETamer%20Ruggli%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EStarring%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ENadine%20Labaki%2C%20Fanny%20Ardant%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3ERating%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3E3.5%2F5%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Bert van Marwijk factfile
Born: May 19 1952
Place of birth: Deventer, Netherlands
Playing position: Midfielder
Teams managed:
1998-2000 Fortuna Sittard
2000-2004 Feyenoord
2004-2006 Borussia Dortmund
2007-2008 Feyenoord
2008-2012 Netherlands
2013-2014 Hamburg
2015-2017 Saudi Arabia
2018 Australia
Major honours (manager):
2001/02 Uefa Cup, Feyenoord
2007/08 KNVB Cup, Feyenoord
World Cup runner-up, Netherlands
MATCH INFO
Crawley Town 3 (Tsaroulla 50', Nadesan 53', Tunnicliffe 70')
Leeds United 0
More from Neighbourhood Watch:
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
I Feel Pretty
Dir: Abby Kohn/Mark Silverstein
Starring: Amy Schumer, Michelle Williams, Emily Ratajkowski, Rory Scovel
The specs
Engine: 3.8-litre, twin-turbo V8
Transmission: eight-speed automatic
Power: 582bhp
Torque: 730Nm
Price: Dh649,000
On sale: now
The five pillars of Islam
MOUNTAINHEAD REVIEW
Starring: Ramy Youssef, Steve Carell, Jason Schwartzman
Director: Jesse Armstrong
Rating: 3.5/5
more from Janine di Giovanni
Veere di Wedding
Dir: Shashanka Ghosh
Starring: Kareena Kapoo-Khan, Sonam Kapoor, Swara Bhaskar and Shikha Talsania
Verdict: 4 Stars
The specs: 2018 BMW R nineT Scrambler
Price, base / as tested Dh57,000
Engine 1,170cc air/oil-cooled flat twin four-stroke engine
Transmission Six-speed gearbox
Power 110hp) @ 7,750rpm
Torque 116Nm @ 6,000rpm
Fuel economy, combined 5.3L / 100km
INDIA'S%20TOP%20INFLUENCERS
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Company%20profile
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About Karol Nawrocki
• Supports military aid for Ukraine, unlike other eurosceptic leaders, but he will oppose its membership in western alliances.
• A nationalist, his campaign slogan was Poland First. "Let's help others, but let's take care of our own citizens first," he said on social media in April.
• Cultivates tough-guy image, posting videos of himself at shooting ranges and in boxing rings.
• Met Donald Trump at the White House and received his backing.
Greatest Royal Rumble match listing
50-man Royal Rumble - names entered so far include Braun Strowman, Daniel Bryan, Kurt Angle, Big Show, Kane, Chris Jericho, The New Day and Elias
Universal Championship Brock Lesnar (champion) v Roman Reigns in a steel cage match
WWE World Heavyweight ChampionshipAJ Styles (champion) v Shinsuke Nakamura
Intercontinental Championship Seth Rollins (champion) v The Miz v Finn Balor v Samoa Joe
United States Championship Jeff Hardy (champion) v Jinder Mahal
SmackDown Tag Team Championship The Bludgeon Brothers (champions) v The Usos
Raw Tag Team Championship (currently vacant) Cesaro and Sheamus v Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt
Casket match The Undertaker v Rusev
Singles match John Cena v Triple H
Cruiserweight Championship Cedric Alexander v Kalisto
Milestones on the road to union
1970
October 26: Bahrain withdraws from a proposal to create a federation of nine with the seven Trucial States and Qatar.
December: Ahmed Al Suwaidi visits New York to discuss potential UN membership.
1971
March 1: Alex Douglas Hume, Conservative foreign secretary confirms that Britain will leave the Gulf and “strongly supports” the creation of a Union of Arab Emirates.
July 12: Historic meeting at which Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid make a binding agreement to create what will become the UAE.
July 18: It is announced that the UAE will be formed from six emirates, with a proposed constitution signed. RAK is not yet part of the agreement.
August 6: The fifth anniversary of Sheikh Zayed becoming Ruler of Abu Dhabi, with official celebrations deferred until later in the year.
August 15: Bahrain becomes independent.
September 3: Qatar becomes independent.
November 23-25: Meeting with Sheikh Zayed and Sheikh Rashid and senior British officials to fix December 2 as date of creation of the UAE.
November 29: At 5.30pm Iranian forces seize the Greater and Lesser Tunbs by force.
November 30: Despite a power sharing agreement, Tehran takes full control of Abu Musa.
November 31: UK officials visit all six participating Emirates to formally end the Trucial States treaties
December 2: 11am, Dubai. New Supreme Council formally elects Sheikh Zayed as President. Treaty of Friendship signed with the UK. 11.30am. Flag raising ceremony at Union House and Al Manhal Palace in Abu Dhabi witnessed by Sheikh Khalifa, then Crown Prince of Abu Dhabi.
December 6: Arab League formally admits the UAE. The first British Ambassador presents his credentials to Sheikh Zayed.
December 9: UAE joins the United Nations.
UAE%20v%20West%20Indies
%3Cp%3EFirst%20ODI%20-%20Sunday%2C%20June%204%20%0D%3Cbr%3ESecond%20ODI%20-%20Tuesday%2C%20June%206%20%0D%3Cbr%3EThird%20ODI%20-%20Friday%2C%20June%209%26nbsp%3B%3C%2Fp%3E%0A%3Cp%3EMatches%20at%20Sharjah%20Cricket%20Stadium.%20All%20games%20start%20at%204.30pm%0D%3Cbr%3E%0D%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EUAE%20squad%3C%2Fstrong%3E%0D%3Cbr%3EMuhammad%20Waseem%20(captain)%2C%20Aayan%20Khan%2C%20Adithya%20Shetty%2C%20Ali%20Naseer%2C%20Ansh%20Tandon%2C%20Aryansh%20Sharma%2C%20Asif%20Khan%2C%20Basil%20Hameed%2C%20Ethan%20D%E2%80%99Souza%2C%20Fahad%20Nawaz%2C%20Jonathan%20Figy%2C%20Junaid%20Siddique%2C%20Karthik%20Meiyappan%2C%20Lovepreet%20Singh%2C%20Matiullah%2C%20Mohammed%20Faraazuddin%2C%20Muhammad%20Jawadullah%2C%20Rameez%20Shahzad%2C%20Rohan%20Mustafa%2C%20Sanchit%20Sharma%2C%20Vriitya%20Aravind%2C%20Zahoor%20Khan%0D%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
The biog
Name: Gul Raziq
From: Charsadda, Pakistan
Family: Wife and six children
Favourite holes at Al Ghazal: 15 and 8
Golf Handicap: 6
Childhood sport: cricket
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
AWARDS
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20Male%20black%20belt%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ELucas%20Protasio%20(BRA)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20female%20black%20belt%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EJulia%20Alves%20(BRA)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20Masters%20black%20belt%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Igor%20Silva%20(BRA)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20Asian%20Jiu-Jitsu%20Federation%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Kazakhstan%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20Academy%20in%20UAE%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3ECommando%20Group%2C%20Abu%20Dhabi%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EBest%20International%20Academy%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Commando%20Group%2C%20Abu%20Dhabi%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EAfrican%20Player%20of%20the%20Year%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EKatiuscia%20Yasmira%20Dias%20(GNB)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EOceanian%20Player%20of%20the%20Year%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAnton%20Minenko%20(AUS)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EEuropean%20Player%20of%20the%20Year%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Rose%20El%20Sharouni%20(NED)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ENorth%20and%20Central%20American%20Player%20of%20the%20Year%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EAlexa%20Yanes%20(USA)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EAsian%20Player%20of%20the%20Year%3A%20%3C%2Fstrong%3EZayed%20Al%20Katheeri%20(UAE)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ERookie%20of%20the%20Year%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Rui%20Neto%20(BRA)Rui%20Neto%20(BRA)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
At a glance
Global events: Much of the UK’s economic woes were blamed on “increased global uncertainty”, which can be interpreted as the economic impact of the Ukraine war and the uncertainty over Donald Trump’s tariffs.
Growth forecasts: Cut for 2025 from 2 per cent to 1 per cent. The OBR watchdog also estimated inflation will average 3.2 per cent this year
Welfare: Universal credit health element cut by 50 per cent and frozen for new claimants, building on cuts to the disability and incapacity bill set out earlier this month
Spending cuts: Overall day-to day-spending across government cut by £6.1bn in 2029-30
Tax evasion: Steps to crack down on tax evasion to raise “£6.5bn per year” for the public purse
Defence: New high-tech weaponry, upgrading HM Naval Base in Portsmouth
Housing: Housebuilding to reach its highest in 40 years, with planning reforms helping generate an extra £3.4bn for public finances