Sensible footwear and dawdling investigations hardly seem the right stuff for a ratings-beating detective nowadays, especially when the competition has turned to androids (Almost Human) and a foodie cannibal (Hannibal) to hook the viewer.
But then there's 67-year-old Brenda Blethyn, who readily admits she "looks like a bag lady but rarely looks in a mirror", in her role as the muddled but shrewd detective chief inspector Vera Stanhope, who returns for her third season in Vera.
One would have to rewind the VCR all the way back to the long-winded, dishevelled Columbo, which starred the late Peter Falk in two wildly successful runs - 1968-1978 on ABC and 1989-2003 on NBC - to find such a slovenly yet successful sleuth.
"Usually when you see a female detective, she's a bit of a pin-up," says Blethyn. "But Vera's no sex symbol, which I find very refreshing. Just because she's scruffy doesn't mean she doesn't command total respect from her team."
Blethyn's triumph here, however, is anything but shabby.
This English actress rose from her working-class roots to win a Golden Globe, Bafta and best actress at Cannes for Secrets and Lies (1996) along with a slew of nods from the Emmys to the Oscars for roles in Little Voice (1998), Saving Grace (2000), Anne Frank (2001) and Pride and Prejudice (2005), and was who was awarded the OBE (Officer of the Order of the British Empire) in 2003.
Her second season of Vera achieved an average UK audience of 6.4 million, with a 23 per cent share of all viewers and 23.9 per cent of adults. A fourth season has already been given the green light for 2014 by ITV.
As the moody Vera faces the world with her acidic wit, cunning and courage, she's never alone thanks to her trusty and long-suffering colleague sergeant Joe Ashworth, a surrogate son played by David Leon, a failed footballer who found his calling wandering Northumberland on screen with Blethyn.
Based on the bestselling Inspector Stanhope books by the celebrated writer Ann Cleeves, the new season pits Vera and her hair-flattening scarecrow hat against a series of daunting challenges, including unravelling the slaughter of a young woman at a luxury country retreat as well as the mystery of a pensioner murdered on a packed commuter train at the height of the rush hour.
Combined with beautifully shot landscapes and atmospheric production values, these four new two-hour dramas promise to create a haunting backdrop for Vera's inner turmoil as she discovers hidden truths about her own past, which threaten to change her life forever.
But what really makes the character resonate with viewers is Vera's common touch - a value that's cherished and upheld by Blethyn in her daily life.
During a recent trip to Uganda in support of Comic Relief, the actress recalls: "I went into one lady's home - a tiny mud hut. And it was as if a light came on. I thought of my house, full of stuff I don't need. So I am getting rid of it - furniture, clothes, everything. It feels quite liberating."
She adds: "We had sod all growing up, but we were so rich in other things. My parents taught me right from wrong - and the importance of humour."
During filming, Blethyn, befitting her stature as a world-renowned talent, could rightly demand to be put up in luxury, to be waited on hand and foot and to dine on a chef's delights - instead, she prefers to stay in a small cottage where she takes care of herself and admits to requesting the occasional cheese sandwich.
And, yes, she loves a good whodunit - and tries to solve her Vera mysteries in her head first.
"I usually work it out. I think I would make a good detective because I'm nosy. I like solving things, I like puzzles and brainteasers. I will sit all day in front of a difficult crossword."
. Vera is broadcast at 5.30pm and 9.30pm December 17 on ITV Choice HD
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MATCH INFO
Manchester United 1 (Rashford 36')
Liverpool 1 (Lallana 84')
Man of the match: Marcus Rashford (Manchester United)
Specs: 2024 McLaren Artura Spider
Engine: 3.0-litre twin-turbo V6 and electric motor
Max power: 700hp at 7,500rpm
Max torque: 720Nm at 2,250rpm
Transmission: Eight-speed dual-clutch auto
0-100km/h: 3.0sec
Top speed: 330kph
Price: From Dh1.14 million ($311,000)
On sale: Now
The full list of 2020 Brit Award nominees (winners in bold):
British group
Coldplay
Foals
Bring me the Horizon
D-Block Europe
Bastille
British Female
Mabel
Freya Ridings
FKA Twigs
Charli xcx
Mahalia
British male
Harry Styles
Lewis Capaldi
Dave
Michael Kiwanuka
Stormzy
Best new artist
Aitch
Lewis Capaldi
Dave
Mabel
Sam Fender
Best song
Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber - I Don’t Care
Mabel - Don’t Call Me Up
Calvin Harrison and Rag’n’Bone Man - Giant
Dave - Location
Mark Ronson feat. Miley Cyrus - Nothing Breaks Like A Heart
AJ Tracey - Ladbroke Grove
Lewis Capaldi - Someone you Loved
Tom Walker - Just You and I
Sam Smith and Normani - Dancing with a Stranger
Stormzy - Vossi Bop
International female
Ariana Grande
Billie Eilish
Camila Cabello
Lana Del Rey
Lizzo
International male
Bruce Springsteen
Burna Boy
Tyler, The Creator
Dermot Kennedy
Post Malone
Best album
Stormzy - Heavy is the Head
Michael Kiwanuka - Kiwanuka
Lewis Capaldi - Divinely Uninspired to a Hellish Extent
Dave - Psychodrama
Harry Styles - Fine Line
Rising star
Celeste
Joy Crookes
beabadoobee
Company profile
Name: Infinite8
Based: Dubai
Launch year: 2017
Number of employees: 90
Sector: Online gaming industry
Funding: $1.2m from a UAE angel investor
If you go
The flights
The closest international airport for those travelling from the UAE is Denver, Colorado. British Airways (www.ba.com) flies from the UAE via London from Dh3,700 return, including taxes. From there, transfers can be arranged to the ranch or it’s a seven-hour drive. Alternatively, take an internal flight to the counties of Cody, Casper, or Billings
The stay
Red Reflet offers a series of packages, with prices varying depending on season. All meals and activities are included, with prices starting from US$2,218 (Dh7,150) per person for a minimum stay of three nights, including taxes. For more information, visit red-reflet-ranch.net.
COMPANY PROFILE
Company name: Revibe
Started: 2022
Founders: Hamza Iraqui and Abdessamad Ben Zakour
Based: UAE
Industry: Refurbished electronics
Funds raised so far: $10m
Investors: Flat6Labs, Resonance and various others
Healthy tips to remember
Here, Dr Mohamed El Abiary, paediatric consultant at Al Zahra Hospital Dubai, shares some advice for parents whose children are fasting during the holy month of Ramadan:
Gradual fasting and golden points - For children under the age of 10, follow a step-by-step approach to fasting and don't push them beyond their limits. Start with a few hours fasting a day and increase it to a half fast and full fast when the child is ready. Every individual's ability varies as per the age and personal readiness. You could introduce a points system that awards the child and offers them encouragement when they make progress with the amount of hours they fast
Why fast? - Explain to your child why they are fasting. By shedding light on the importance of abstaining from food and drink, children may feel more encouraged to give it there all during the observance period. It is also a good opportunity to teach children about controlling urges, doing good for others and instilling healthy food habits
Sleep and suhoor - A child needs adequate sleep every night - at least eight hours. Make sure to set a routine early bedtime so he/she has sufficient time to wake up for suhoor, which is an essential meal at the beginning of the day
Good diet - Nutritious food is crucial to ensuring a healthy Ramadan for children. They must refrain from eating too much junk food as well as canned goods and snacks and drinks high in sugar. Foods that are rich in nutrients, vitamins and proteins, like fruits, fresh meats and vegetables, make for a good balanced diet
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
The advice provided in our columns does not constitute legal advice and is provided for information only. Readers are encouraged to seek independent legal advice.
Afro salons
For women:
Sisu Hair Salon, Jumeirah 1, Dubai
Boho Salon, Al Barsha South, Dubai
Moonlight, Al Falah Street, Abu Dhabi
For men:
MK Barbershop, Dar Al Wasl Mall, Dubai
Regency Saloon, Al Zahiyah, Abu Dhabi
Uptown Barbershop, Al Nasseriya, Sharjah