Don Quixote has spawned many adaptations and radical reinterpretations. One of the most interesting literary rewrites was Graham Greene's 1982 novel Monsignor Quixote, in which a recently elevated parish priest tours Spain – not on horseback with a loyal squire but in an old Seat 600 with a former communist mayor.
Salman Rushdie is the latest author to channel Miguel de Cervantes's seminal work. His latest novel, Quichotte, has him following Greene with a comic restyling. Cervantes's hero was a humble nobleman whose obsession with chivalric romances deluded him into thinking he was a knight errant. Rushdie's fantasist protagonist is a homeless and near-friendless travelling salesman of Indian origin whose brain has been addled by mindless television.
He is Ismail Smile, "a brown man in America longing for a brown woman". The woman in question is Salma R, a bipolar former Bollywood and Hollywood actress who now hosts her own daytime talk show in New York. When Ismail is laid off from his job, he adopts the pseudonym Quichotte, gets into his gunmetal grey Chevy Cruze with his son and sidekick Sancho, and embarks on a cross-country quest to track down and win over "the queen of Must See TV".
So begins an inventive pastiche – or so we believe. Rushdie refuses to play a straightforward imitation game. Having tipped his hat to Cervantes, he proceeds to veer away from his source material and infuse his narrative with a diverse cast and big ideas. Rushdie’s trademark trickery manifests itself in chapter two.
We are led into another realm of fictitiousness when Sam DuChamp is introduced as Quichotte’s creator and the writer of chapter one. This second-rate spy novelist has turned his hand to a different kind of novel. Unbeknownst to him, his own story will play out in tandem with Quichotte’s picaresque adventures.
We also hear of the schemes and struggles of a range of colourful secondary characters. Ismail's cousin and erstwhile employer Dr R K Smile is a pharmaceutical billionaire in Atlanta who dabbles profitably in opioids. Scientist-entrepreneur Evel Cent looks to a future in which his XChange Technology will transport the human race through portals to better worlds. Sam seeks to heal family rifts after years of estrangement from his son and sister – the latter a human rights lawyer who is now fighting a losing battle with cancer in London.
As absorbing as these many strands are, the novel works best when Quichotte or Salma are on the page. Salma's backstory charts her early years in Mumbai, her leap of faith to America following her mother's death and her steady rise to become the second most influential woman in America (after Oprah). But she also harbours a dark family secret that rears its ugly head when Quichotte encloses a photograph of himself with his latest love letter.
Quichotte’s madcap road-trip to his beloved in New York is filled with bouts of absurdity. Father and son encounter talking revolvers, ferocious mastodons and an Italian-speaking cricket called Jiminy. Sancho is in actual fact both an imaginary son and a hazy vision (“I look like a bad TV picture”).
Once again, Rushdie implies that his flights of fancy are signs of the times. His last-but-one novel, Two Years Eight Months and Twenty-Eight Nights, played out in an epoch marked by so-called "strangenesses". Similarly, Quichotte is set in "the Age of Anything-Can-Happen". Everything is possible: "A whole nation might jump off a cliff like swarming lemmings. Men who played presidents on TV could become presidents."
While Rushdie is prone to excess, he is also capable of reining it in. His leaner prose produce dazzling results
As ever, Rushdie's brand of magic realism will not be to every reader's taste. More problematic, however, is the unchecked exuberance that saturates parts of this novel and other recent works. The plot is sidelined for scattershot stories, outlandish set-pieces and tangential riffs. Lengthy descriptive paragraphs or monologues read like rambling screeds overstuffed with facts, repetitive tics, pop-culture references and literary allusions. When a character introduces himself as Conrad Chekhov, we recall how Rushdie appropriated those writers' first names for his memoir Joseph Anton. We then appreciate anew their ability to tell a streamlined tale without recourse to extraneous detail or showy effects.
While Rushdie is prone to excess, he is also capable of reining it in. His leaner prose produce dazzling results. We get caustically satirical sideswipes and beautiful meditations on love, hope, madness, forgiveness and belonging (“Is there a place for us in this America?” an uncertain Sancho asks his father). Quichotte’s journey is made up of one expertly staged tragicomic scene after another, from his farcical study of “classic” dating TV shows to garner tips for wooing Salma, to his confrontation in a diner with the trigger-happy proprietor and his racist clientele.
Quichotte is sitting on the Booker Prize shortlist. It fully deserves its place because, for all its boisterousness, it is Rushdie's finest novel in years.
The years Ramadan fell in May
Killing of Qassem Suleimani
EA Sports FC 26
Publisher: EA Sports
Consoles: PC, PlayStation 4/5, Xbox Series X/S
Rating: 3/5
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Top 10 in the F1 drivers' standings
1. Sebastian Vettel, Ferrari 202 points
2. Lewis Hamilton, Mercedes-GP 188
3. Valtteri Bottas, Mercedes-GP 169
4. Daniel Ricciardo, Red Bull Racing 117
5. Kimi Raikkonen, Ferrari 116
6. Max Verstappen, Red Bull Racing 67
7. Sergio Perez, Force India 56
8. Esteban Ocon, Force India 45
9. Carlos Sainz Jr, Toro Rosso 35
10. Nico Hulkenberg, Renault 26
BIRD%20BOX%20BARCELONA
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The specs: 2017 Lotus Evora Sport 410
Price, base / as tested Dh395,000 / Dh420,000
Engine 3.5L V6
Transmission Six-speed manual
Power 410hp @ 7,000rpm
Torque 420Nm @ 3,500rpm
Fuel economy, combined 9.7L / 100km
Traces%20of%20Enayat
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EAuthor%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20Iman%20Mersal%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPublisher%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20And%20Other%20Stories%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EPages%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%20240%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Sholto Byrnes on Myanmar politics
Our family matters legal consultant
Name: Hassan Mohsen Elhais
Position: legal consultant with Al Rowaad Advocates and Legal Consultants.
War 2
Director: Ayan Mukerji
Stars: Hrithik Roshan, NTR, Kiara Advani, Ashutosh Rana
Rating: 2/5
EMILY%20IN%20PARIS%3A%20SEASON%203
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Crime%20Wave
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FIGHT%20CARD
%3Cp%3E%3Cstrong%3EFeatherweight%204%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EYousuf%20Ali%20(2-0-0)%20(win-loss-draw)%20v%20Alex%20Semugenyi%20(0-1-0)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EWelterweight%206%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EBenyamin%20Moradzadeh%20(0-0-0)%20v%20Rohit%20Chaudhary%20(4-0-2)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EHeavyweight%204%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EYoussef%20Karrar%20(1-0-0)%20v%20Muhammad%20Muzeei%20(0-0-0)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3EWelterweight%206%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EMarwan%20Mohamad%20Madboly%20(2-0-0)%20v%20Sheldon%20Schultz%20(4-4-0)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ESuper%20featherweight%208%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EBishara%20Sabbar%20(6-0-0)%20v%20Mohammed%20Azahar%20(8-5-1)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ECruiseweight%208%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EMohammed%20Bekdash%20(25-0-0)%20v%20Musa%20N%E2%80%99tege%20(8-4-0)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ESuper%20flyweight%2010%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3ESultan%20Al%20Nuaimi%20(9-0-0)%20v%20Jemsi%20Kibazange%20(18-6-2)%3Cbr%3E%3Cstrong%3ELightweight%2010%20rounds%3A%3C%2Fstrong%3E%3Cbr%3EBader%20Samreen%20(8-0-0)%20v%20Jose%20Paez%20Gonzales%20(16-2-2-)%3C%2Fp%3E%0A
Afro%20salons
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MEDIEVIL%20(1998)
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Omar Yabroudi's factfile
Born: October 20, 1989, Sharjah
Education: Bachelor of Science and Football, Liverpool John Moores University
2010: Accrington Stanley FC, internship
2010-2012: Crystal Palace, performance analyst with U-18 academy
2012-2015: Barnet FC, first-team performance analyst/head of recruitment
2015-2017: Nottingham Forest, head of recruitment
2018-present: Crystal Palace, player recruitment manager
Cinco in numbers
Dh3.7 million
The estimated cost of Victoria Swarovski’s gem-encrusted Michael Cinco wedding gown
46
The number, in kilograms, that Swarovski’s wedding gown weighed.
1,000
The hours it took to create Cinco’s vermillion petal gown, as seen in his atelier [note, is the one he’s playing with in the corner of a room]
50
How many looks Cinco has created in a new collection to celebrate Ballet Philippines’ 50th birthday
3,000
The hours needed to create the butterfly gown worn by Aishwarya Rai to the 2018 Cannes Film Festival.
1.1 million
The number of followers that Michael Cinco’s Instagram account has garnered.
Winners
Ballon d’Or (Men’s)
Ousmane Dembélé (Paris Saint-Germain / France)
Ballon d’Or Féminin (Women’s)
Aitana Bonmatí (Barcelona / Spain)
Kopa Trophy (Best player under 21 – Men’s)
Lamine Yamal (Barcelona / Spain)
Best Young Women’s Player
Vicky López (Barcelona / Spain)
Yashin Trophy (Best Goalkeeper – Men’s)
Gianluigi Donnarumma (Paris Saint-Germain and Manchester City / Italy)
Best Women’s Goalkeeper
Hannah Hampton (England / Aston Villa and Chelsea)
Men’s Coach of the Year
Luis Enrique (Paris Saint-Germain)
Women’s Coach of the Year
Sarina Wiegman (England)
The President's Cake
Director: Hasan Hadi
Starring: Baneen Ahmad Nayyef, Waheed Thabet Khreibat, Sajad Mohamad Qasem
Rating: 4/5
COMPANY%20PROFILE
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Tips for job-seekers
- Do not submit your application through the Easy Apply button on LinkedIn. Employers receive between 600 and 800 replies for each job advert on the platform. If you are the right fit for a job, connect to a relevant person in the company on LinkedIn and send them a direct message.
- Make sure you are an exact fit for the job advertised. If you are an HR manager with five years’ experience in retail and the job requires a similar candidate with five years’ experience in consumer, you should apply. But if you have no experience in HR, do not apply for the job.
David Mackenzie, founder of recruitment agency Mackenzie Jones Middle East
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
The biog
Favourite food: Tabbouleh, greek salad and sushi
Favourite TV show: That 70s Show
Favourite animal: Ferrets, they are smart, sensitive, playful and loving
Favourite holiday destination: Seychelles, my resolution for 2020 is to visit as many spiritual retreats and animal shelters across the world as I can
Name of first pet: Eddy, a Persian cat that showed up at our home
Favourite dog breed: I love them all - if I had to pick Yorkshire terrier for small dogs and St Bernard's for big
Super%20Mario%20Bros%20Wonder
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MOUNTAINHEAD REVIEW
Starring: Ramy Youssef, Steve Carell, Jason Schwartzman
Director: Jesse Armstrong
Rating: 3.5/5
The alternatives
• Founded in 2014, Telr is a payment aggregator and gateway with an office in Silicon Oasis. It’s e-commerce entry plan costs Dh349 monthly (plus VAT). QR codes direct customers to an online payment page and merchants can generate payments through messaging apps.
• Business Bay’s Pallapay claims 40,000-plus active merchants who can invoice customers and receive payment by card. Fees range from 1.99 per cent plus Dh1 per transaction depending on payment method and location, such as online or via UAE mobile.
• Tap started in May 2013 in Kuwait, allowing Middle East businesses to bill, accept, receive and make payments online “easier, faster and smoother” via goSell and goCollect. It supports more than 10,000 merchants. Monthly fees range from US$65-100, plus card charges of 2.75-3.75 per cent and Dh1.2 per sale.
• 2checkout’s “all-in-one payment gateway and merchant account” accepts payments in 200-plus markets for 2.4-3.9 per cent, plus a Dh1.2-Dh1.8 currency conversion charge. The US provider processes online shop and mobile transactions and has 17,000-plus active digital commerce users.
• PayPal is probably the best-known online goods payment method - usually used for eBay purchases - but can be used to receive funds, providing everyone’s signed up. Costs from 2.9 per cent plus Dh1.2 per transaction.
UAE currency: the story behind the money in your pockets
THE%20SWIMMERS
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More on animal trafficking
More from Aya Iskandarani
Best Academy: Ajax and Benfica
Best Agent: Jorge Mendes
Best Club : Liverpool
Best Coach: Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool)
Best Goalkeeper: Alisson Becker
Best Men’s Player: Cristiano Ronaldo
Best Partnership of the Year Award by SportBusiness: Manchester City and SAP
Best Referee: Stephanie Frappart
Best Revelation Player: Joao Felix (Atletico Madrid and Portugal)
Best Sporting Director: Andrea Berta (Atletico Madrid)
Best Women's Player: Lucy Bronze
Best Young Arab Player: Achraf Hakimi
Kooora – Best Arab Club: Al Hilal (Saudi Arabia)
Kooora – Best Arab Player: Abderrazak Hamdallah (Al-Nassr FC, Saudi Arabia)
Player Career Award: Miralem Pjanic and Ryan Giggs